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ThePlanetRodinia — The Call of Andria
Published: 2012-09-18 02:28:33 +0000 UTC; Views: 1181; Favourites: 46; Downloads: 33
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What if a descendant of Cthulhu called upon an artificial race?Would they be affected by the madness, or might they understand the beast?
The original is for sale on eBay in case you're interested.
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Comments: 96
Cool!
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That depends on whether the race would understand the Cthulian's logic, or lack thereof.
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Cthulhu's logic is simple, the world was better off without humans.
So if they didn't understand it, you think they would fight him?
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Hmm....The only problem with that is that there were some other Elder Ones and entities that were somewhat fond of humans, or at least in meddling in their lives. However....Since most humans didn't understand Cthulhu's logic either, chances are the artificial race might not fight him unless he exerts what would come across as an overwhelmingly harmful influence, if not one which would inhibit said race's main objectives, in part and as a whole.
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Yeah, I guess I assumed Cthulhu's madness only effected creatures with organic minds.
I don't think there were any robots in the Lovecraft stories.
I soppose if AIs could see that Cthulhu was destroying humanity, they might intervene on our behalf.
But, he is a timeless creature, for him, even death has died.
Perhaps he has encountered robots in the ancient past on another world.
Artificial beings might be even easier to destroy than organic ones.
I think the idea of Cthulhu encountering artificially intelligent beings should be further explored.
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Hmm....True that. I'd love to see more interactions between Cthulhu, or his descendants, and AI beings. ^^
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Yes, please do! It's probably already infected...
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There is some serious controlled line work in your pieces, but this one really stood out for me when I was looking. I love the geometric patterns that emerge in areas of the image. If you took sections of this and printed them onto clothing it would work really well.
Impressive work mate, keep it up.
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Thanks, yeah I really like to get into the 'shading shapes' sometimes.
Instead of traditional shading it's a trip to try to make every line a pattern that might be on the object
and then leave some white on the lighter areas.
Glad you like it.
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There is something immense about this image. I love the layout of it, it really allows for the whole thing to unfold. I also like the 'three' eyes in the Cthulhu.
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Cool, I'm hoping there'll be monsters in out next album.
I've be trying forever to come up with a somewhat pretty for a female Cthulhu.
I came across Lolthulhu recently, I think I kinda like it cause it has Lolth in there too.
Maybe Lolthulhula?
I'm up for any suggestions.
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lol really not at all going along the idea. I read a book of short stories around this time of year a couple of years ago by Kelly Link ([link] ). She does an interestingly wide variety of stories most of which feature cute little illustrations a the beginning of them. I must admit that I both liked and disliked a lot of her work as it tends to run towards very open ended. I think open ended work both works and sometimes does not work towards the readers satisfaction.
Not being a monster person, I'm not really sure. I've never been good at creatures or monsters not even when I try and make them up. They always look rather dumpy and childish.
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Yeah, open ended stuff can be frustrating sometimes.
Well, especially in stories.
I guess my thing with the pretty monster is that I'd like to be able to picture a beautiful form that wasn't human.
If I could pull of a sexy monster, that would be really amazing, and not just tentacles or bat wings stuck on a beautiful woman, but a whole strange form that was some how attractive.
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Okay, so I've been trying to formulate a good response to this this comment. While I'm not sure this is good, here is what I have.
I think that you have 'pretty' monstrous elements in quiet a lot of your images. I think that perhaps it is the association between the pretty woman and the less human content in much of your work. The combination of elements with in the art work plays upon it's self.
This image for example. I think that the creature has a sexuality all of it's own by association with the female figure in the foreground. There is something sinuous and flowing about the spread of the creature across the ground. I think to the association of pattern within the human females garments as well as on the creature adds to that association. I think that, that also works to some extent in this one [link] , with the way the creatures weaves through the image, juxtaposed with her figure.
Similarly in images like these: [link] [link] [link] . You have a lot of monstrous elements, combined with the softer human figure. I think, that's one of the things that you do really well is build this world around the figures within. It ties them together and makes them something more than just sexy fantasy female or scifi image.
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Wow! Really great observations!
I don't know what to say.
I ponder the meaning of my "monstrous beauty" motif constantly.
I think it has something to do with sexuality being a natural and creative or generative aspect of attraction.
But there are many horrors associated with nature as well.
And with sexuality. Perhaps I want to get to a point where I don't judge the dark or pleasant aspects of love or loving, but just accept it
and experience it.
I feel like the monsters are saying. "It's ok to think whatever crosses your mind."
If you can entertain you dark fantasies in a harmless or maybe even beautiful way,
You'll be a happier person for all the real people in your life?
I'm kinda reaching here.
I'd love to hear your thoughts.
You seem to describe what I'm doing very accurately, now can you tell me why?
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Why... I think that some of my insights come from knowing and talking with you. However a lot of what I see is there within the work it's self, if you look for it. Many of my insights stem from conversations that I had during critiques in school as well.
The idea of repeated motifs and shape associations, for example in this piece [link] the combination of the sharp shapes are most often associated with 'danger' whether we realize it or not, that gives this image a darker feel while the softer forms temper that. There are other aspects as you look closer. Also I tend to look at shapes and think about their associations, working with silhouettes has really made me think a lot more about that side of a work. But it's funny, I don't always think about it when I drawing but I can see it in someone else's work.
So I guess the 'why is two fold', it's a combination of a knowledge of the artist, and a knowledge of the art world. Would I be able to do so if I didn't have some idea of what you were doing or your predilections? Probably to some extent but maybe not completely, it also depends. Because sometimes my reading is totally different from what someone is trying to say.
That's why I'm always interested in how people read my own work. I know what I was trying to convey but range of readings is astounding and talking with people about what they see or how they read my work, helps me better target what I want to do with an image. For example this [link] piece was up in the group show on Friday and the people I managed to talk to had a somewhat different read from what i was going for; however, I ended up realizing that some of what they were seeing actual worked as I intended it to just in a different way.
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Yeah, I guess when we put out art we have to let it go a bit as far as people's intepretations.
But that's what I really like about yours.
There pretty right on and sometimes seem to surpass my own.
I suppose it helps that I don't often have a specific message or intent in my work. It's weird how the message can be so important and the desire to share it too, but the actual message might be rather vague.
What I mean is that I think you get what I'm saying even if I don't totally get it and even if we can't explain it to eachother.
Sharp and soft, dangerous and comfoting. I like to think my characters stride gracefully through a world full of such forms.
How did your piece end up being accuately recieved in an unintented way?
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I suppose it's one of those things you try and you learn and sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn't. I don't know, I guess a lot of my images come from a very clear image or moment from my own mind, a story or sometimes a song. It's that moment that is key not everything else. The moment of choice or the moment just before that choice.
I think that with a lot of things you have a much wider story base that you're drawing from with your images. You're thinking about the whole story and everything that is there. Perhaps in that, sometimes the specific moments get a little hazy. However, each of your images often features a moment or an action so perhaps not.
My intent behind that silhouette was to try and display a number of emotions and feelings. Stressed out, but uncertain what to do about it and yet also have the uncertainty of movement. In that, is this girl going to jump up and start screaming or start crying or neither.
In talking to people at the show that night the biggest percentage of reaction or words that I got were more: sad, introspective and others. But the majority of people read the introspective or looking inward. Which is in part what I was trying to get at. In that the color was intended to be an outward expression of an internal feeling that was in some ways the cause of or the driving force behind the emotion and the feeling.
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I think in some ways it isn't even 'ourselves' who are judging the darker aspects of where our fantasies may take us. It's the knowledge that is left with us from society. We are taught from a young age what is right and what is wrong in regards to many things from gender, sexuality and other aspects of our lives. Often sex is considered a secret thing that leaves people filled with shame because of their desires, especially when those desires are none hetero-normative. And if you take the definition of hetero-normative 'one guy, one girl + sexual penetration', there are a lot of acts and desires that do not fit into that category.
One of my favorite series of books was written by W. A. Hoffman, the series is "Raised by Wolves", and it's about a couple of men and it's set during the lat 1600 and early 1700. But one of the things I really like about this series is the exploration that occurs into and surrounding desires that are of a none hetero-normative inclination. And they aren't simply homosexual desires but desires that include some bondage elements. Of the course of the story things build up and are explored. Many people don't care for the more philosophical bent to these books but I enjoy the way the characters question actions, events, and desires and then work through them slowly.
Actually I don't think that you're reaching in the least. I think that many of us have dark fantasies, whether those include bondage of some sort, or other desires. I think that is where roll playing can come in for some people. However, I think that we are taught be ashamed of our desires--as mentioned above--and that makes it hard for us to face, embrace or even work with those things. We are afraid to tell other people what those desires might be, etc. But if we can except them and find different outlets for them such as art, roll playing (in all it's varieties), etc... I do think we would be happier more balanced people.
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Last night I was at a friends house.
She's a lesbian and lives with her girlfriend.
Their house is such a warm and wonderful place.
I felt such joy there, they were making creepy cute stuffed animals to sell at the Patchwork Festival.
To base someone's goodness or badness on sexual preference seems so ignorant!
Plus they had four big fluffy cats!
Our desires may deviate from the norm, but they're not really wrong unless we want to hurt someone.
Oh, but what if someone wants us to hurt them or bind them?
Or if we would like to be hurt or bound ourselves?
I think peoples need are partly genetic and partly generated by our life experience.
If your girlfriend/boyfriend likes to be tied up because of some psychological "problem" resulting an imperfect childhood,
Are you a bad person for entertaining their dark desire?
I don't think so, if your motive is pleasing them.
And especially not if you love them.
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I honestly don't think that you are a bad person for your desires unless the ones you act upon are acted upon in a non consensual violent or sexual fashion. You can roll play noncon or violet fantasy in a safe way but if you decide to enact them out in truth, that's when it crosses over the lines. Hell you can want to 'rape' someone and find people who want that and who will play that part. If they are willing and consent to it. I don't think it's wrong.
Unfortunately we love to judge ourselves and those around us by right or wrong and what we do in life, in bed and in everything else.
BTW, Patchwork stuffed animals sound great! I just finished up a whole bunch of hand dyed scarves for a Art/Craft Fair today.
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Yeah, it's funny how simple it is. Your rights only extend as far as the edge of someone else's.
I think "right and wrong" are a misconception in many cases.
The human animal is what it is, it should only be limited when it's actions infringe on it's comrades.
(Socially speaking of course, our actions against nature are a whole other matter.)
Yeah, it was pretty fun to party at their house when they were in craft mode.
My work gets so personal and I think meaningless to the outside world sometimes.
Sometimes it seems like it would fun to just make neat stuff.
How did it go at the Art/Craft fair?
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Well then you get into the whole question of sin or sinning. What is it to sin? To sin against self, to sin against man or to sin against god? Would one add to sin again nature in there which then rises the whole question of what is natural... It's a great big can of worms that in the end we will all never agree upon.
I think that much of "Right and Wrong" is subjective much like truth. What is right for you will not be right for me and visa versa. However, that leads back to the question of 'sin' in some ways. Because right and wrong do not necessarily = sin or not sinning. I think that in the end it comes down to when our actions hurt others without their consent. Or perhaps when our actions hurt others physically or mentally without their consent. There are many, many ways to infringe on someone elses space, life, thought, or physicality and I don't think that all of them are persay wrong.
I think the difference often is a lot of what matters to you is the process that went into the making but what the outside world sees is the finished product and not all the work that went into it.
It was alright, it did not go as well as I would have liked it to. But such as it is. I suppose now I should begin to rebuild my Etsy store since it has fallen into disrepair.
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I think sins are an artificial construct,
Like right and wrong.
Animals and nature just seem to follow their course.
But, part of human nature is to be able to change that course.
I think often in our case, compassion and empathy equal survival.
And not just survival, excellence.
So we construct rules of moral conduct, some of which make sense
and other that don't.
As long as you follow the basic ideas of compassion and empathy concerning others,
I think you are on a natural path.
(Sorry to get all philosophical, this might be the most satisfying conversation I'll have all day.
Thanksgiving with the family never seems to get very interesting.
Cool! you've got and Etsy store? I do too!
Have you had much luck with that?
I really wanna try to sell some of my work on there.
I set up a few thing but probably didn't spend enough time figuring out how it works.
Can we friend each other on there?
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Oh, I agree with the artificial construct of it but I think that any construct that we use to try and define or describe nature is just that 'artificial' in some way. We use words and concept that do not exist in the world around us. They are simply a took to help us understand.
After all do the ideas of compassion and empathy exist around us? The world works on a different set of rules regarding nature and survival that for a great part we do not operate under any longer--save on the most basic level.
I think that we pick and choose our tools, constructs and ideas with which we choose to talk about sin, right, wrong, compassion, nature, empathy, or other wise. They are all similar in some ways, the word choices simply give them different connotations. I was thinking about on a book I read, in which the ideas were discussed in terms of who was being sinned against. Self, Man, Nature and God... but I haven't to go back to get the specifics. I disagree with the choice of the word 'sin' but it is handy in some ways despite the religious association.
Lol, no worries Thanksgiving actually went well over here which is an odd occasion. There were no fights, no tension... we all got along which is a first in a couple of years. The conversation might not be stimulating but it is nice to just have fun with others. Of course we tend to come and gone and just get together for the meal, so I spent a nice morning at the park.
Sure, I haven't gotten around to posting anything else yet. LOL, should. [link] I've found the hardest thing to do on Etsy is to get started. People don't like purchasing from people who don't have any ratings or reviews. One of the things I've noticed a lot of people do is trades. If you like something in someone's shop ask them if they would be willing to trade for something out of your shop. Then you both just send the items instead of payment and write reviews. I've done it a few times but my Etsy sort of fell out of use when I was working towards graduation and I haven't picked it back up again yet. But I'm getting there, started working with my sister as a model since I don't have access to the maniquins and such at school.
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You are so wise!
I really think so!
And you like me and what I do so it makes it seem like they might be wise too.
Yeah, all our words and names are not what the "thing" actually is.
They're just abstractions.
There is a true reality, but it's hard to see through all the preconceptions.
I guess what makes me feel great about the concept of right and wrong, sin,
Is that violence is the exception, peace is the norm. If humans were mostly killing,
the world would have become a wasteland long ago.
I like that the universe has a life clause that says "Things must be "mostly" stable for the organism to survive."
Nice there were no fights on the turkey day.
My house is not like that at all.
It's super mellow, I guess I'm kinda selfish, I just find myself thinking "Man! a day off work and I'm just hanging out when I could be making art!". I guess there's more to life than art, but typical family stuff just feels like a delay sometimes.
So I've been thinking I need to make some prints of my work, to sell at shows and maybe on Etsy,
I was wondering if you would like to help me pick out the best, or ones that need a slight adjustment.
You seem to look so deeply into my work, maybe just 3 or 4 pieces that I should really focus on.
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In the end I think it all goes back to balance. For all the violence, darkness and destruction there is often strength, courage, love, kindness and beauty. In truth there is actually even a beauty in destruction.
lol, I know what you mean. On one hand it is kind of nice to be around friends and family for the Holidays, on the other hand it's like... awe man there are so many other things I could be drawing, sewing, writing, etc.
Alright hmmm.... I guess if I had to pick here are some of the ones that I would look at.
[link]
[link]
[link]
[link]
[link]
[link]
[link]
Beyond that, you might also consider,
[link]
[link]
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Wow! you really picked a lot of my favorites.
I'm think of doing mostly color prints, people seem to like color so much more.
I'm actually coloring a few of the ones you mentioned.
I've been spending a lot more time getting the colors to look richer and deeper,
but do you think the simpler more Mucha style works as well?
Which on do you like better?
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People do seem to like color more. I think because it's flashier and we like our flashy. Though... I don't know. There is still something to be said for pushing black and white. I need to think about that more--again.
I sort of addressed this question in a couple of posts already today. I honestly don't want to label either one as better or worse because there are elements that I like in both of them. And in the new images you've been posting there are moments I like and there are moments in the old images I like as well.
Which do I like better, hmmm.... Let me try something. Okay so here are a few of the ones you've re done that I can find the previous versions of as well:
Kali Kills Amorphous: [link] [link] [link]
Of these three, I honestly like parts of all of them and no one stands out as just being greater than the others. But again I think it really--with this image--depends on what you are going for.
Icons of Andria vs Approaching the Temple: [link] [link]
Okay so again... I feel torn. I really love the dimension and the depth that you've gained in the new one. I love the way the temple looks and how her ship feels more defined. I love the depth that the head dress has but there is something that I just really like in the white as well.
I think that I especially like the gold work on the body suit and the details on the 'wings' is beautiful, but I really do love them white. They just jump out. I wonder if maybe some areas don't stay white as well. Not that you need to go back and change it but think about it.
So Jula: [link] [link]
On this one, I like the new version better. There are elements in the old one I like. The contrast of colors and the elements of pop. But there is something in the subtly of the second one that appeals to me more. I think that it feels more dangerous and I think for this image, that works better. Given the diagonal's in the composition, the blood, the points on his head vs the sinuous shape of his body, etc. I think the new version works better.
Neo-Elven vs Elven-Nouveau: [link] [link]
A couple of points on this one, the cropping in the new version... the fact that the top of her hair/head is cut off really bothers me. I like the edition of the sheer areas to the body suit.
However, I think the lighting worked a lot better with the old image than with the new image. She is very bright--which could be an elven thing. But it looks like she's under a shield/umbrella like thing and it's shadowing the tower behind her but she is all highlighted, etc. The light/shadow/highlight's throw me off on the new version but I think they worked better in the old version as a whole.
I think I do like the whole image better than the cropping... it feels richer.
The Oracle: [link] [link]
I thought you had another colored version of this but I couldn't find it.
On this image, I actually like the black and white better than the color. I like the flatness of it, I think that it makes the image feel a little more ambiguous, it leaves more questions where as the colored one explains too much.
Ummm... I in the colored version I also find the tan/gray lines somewhat off putting. I think they flatten the image out because there seems to be no shadow falling from the dais and yet no obvious light source. Like wise I find the lighting on her to be very ambiguous. Everything around her is darker, dimner, less obvious but she just pops right out of there full of detail which seems to leave little mystery about her.
I don't know it's hard to explain and a lot of this is again subjective and just my own impressions or ideas.
Hypnotized by Flowers and Ikiou the Sylph: [link] [link]
Oooh... again I'm torn on this one. I love the exotic qualities in the new one. The purple and gold, the shiny flower and lights and her hair and wings. But I just find something wonderful in the flatter coloring style of the other one as well.
I think for the purposes of the image I would go with the new one... because it highlights the flower more than the old one. That seems to be the focal point of the image. In the old image she stands out more than anything else because of the white and the bright purple and gold jumps out before the flower. In the new image with the darker richer colors the flower stands out.
Alright, I shall stop now. Just some food for thought.
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Ok first of all, I just want to say, I'm really flattered that you took the time to compare so many of my works.
Sometimes I wish I could just give you all the photoshop files and you could make a composite of all your favorite elements.
But I'm not sure if all the sizes would line up, might be fun or a tedious nightmare.
It would be neat to see you sort of painting with different versions of my work. So conceptual.
I really think the bottom line is that I need the think more about the whole image rather than the individual parts.
I love line art, and I love white, but once I start rendering part of the image, it's so hard to leave other parts alone!
Which parts do I leave and which do I render?
It seems so intuitive for this guy.[link]
Maybe heavier rendering around the face hands and other gracefulness.
Or maybe more rendering of things in the foreground and more space in the back like Moebius [link]
And then there's the whole color issue, part of me thinks I should study color theory but part of me thinks
I'll get more interesting combinations if I just make it up.
Sometimes it seems like pushing things that clash a little bit can be more stimulating to the eye.
Some of my more overworked pieces seem slightly less exciting color wise.
I guess I don't really want to make realistic images, I always like a little bit of a graphic or design element in them.
My favorite quote from Stanley Kubrick: "Realistic is good, but interesting is better."
Well, you probably have no idea how often you pop into my head while I'm working.
It's really pleasantly comforting sometimes, like have a friend in your head guiding you on.
I totally get what you're saying and agree with your thoughts on my work.
I guess the message I want to convey with a lot of my work is "Wow, this is a gorgeous and powerful goddess, I should worship at her feet, but I would love to sleep with her too!"
No matter where they are or what they are doing, my figures seem so calm and relaxed and in control.
So I don't think I want to convey any kind of message of pain or fear.
But many of them are almost nude and surrounded by wiggly danger or at least creepiness.
I guess the idea of potential vulnerability is really moving to me,
especially if it is never acted upon.
No one attempts to defile the precious one because the know the good she will bring to all.
The figures are drawn from real models, I feel I try to respect what nature has made to the best of my abilities,
But the nouveau suits and surroundings are pretty much in my head.
It's funny though, I always spend the first part of the work trying to get the model to look right.
It can be a tedious and frustrating experience, but it's kind like an artistic work out,
once my mind gets in that place of trying to capture subtly gorgeous forms,
The wiggly world around her seems to flow more smoothly.
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I think in the end just doing what you're doing will help you work out a lot of questions. The best way to figure out how you want to do something or what you want to do is to try and do it. See what happens when you do it one way, it might work and it might not. However, you won't know until you try.
Hmm... I think you've hit on something with the 'potential vulnerability' that is there. A lot of your images have that the potential for danger, or fear or violence without going there. That edge in between, the moment where things could go either way is what I see a lot. I tend to think of things in moments, in glimpses, in the times when we decide and it changes our lives or the way we see the world. I often feel like you capture the moments before or after those decisions.
There is something beautiful about getting the figure just right and then putting cloths on it. That's often the turning point in an image for me, is when the figure looks right. Many images end up going nowhere because the figure never quite works out right--mostly because I didn't take the time to figure out the proportions right--but such as it is.
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It's funny, when I look back on my teen life, I think I was a pretty shy boy,
dates could go on till 6am before we even kissed.
As an older man, up for anything two consenting adults might desire,
I find that my earlier innocent reluctance to act might have been a lot of what was attractive about me.
The dream of what may come can be a lot more enticing than what has already transpired.
I feel all my responses to your comments have been really sexual tonight,
But you started it!
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*chuckles* It was probably a team effort there. But when you start talking about desire and sexy goddesses... It is probably bound to end up there anyway.
The hunt is as exciting as the eventuality if not more so. The chase is the fun part, the uncertainty of dancing around someone, waiting, hoping, dreaming... Sometimes those nerve wracking feelings are more exciting.
I think that those first moments sometimes mean more than the sex. The first time you hold hands, the first kiss. Those little moments when things begin to shift they can hold a lot of power, they can be turning points in either direction. But often they get over looked. I have a short story somewhere that's about a first kiss and the tension leading up to it.
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Yeah, the idea of being safe or even harmless is kinda cool too.
I remember a lot of times thinking maybe she really want's to kiss me too but I'm not making the first move.
I remember one of the most erotic experiences of my life was when a girl just traced lines around my face with her finger.
Granted, it was high school so there was quite a bit of pent up hormone stuff going on, but it was really euphoric.
Though, I once had a girl friend tell me, never ask for a kiss, just do it. What's wrong with asking!
For a guy like me, the 'just do it' approach meant the girl would have to make it pretty obvious or make the first move.
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I don't know in some ways I think as we get older certain pattern's emerge and sometimes it's the breaking of those patterns that is the most exciting. When someone else does something that we don't expect even if it isn't what we might think of or originally categorize as 'erotic'. The presents and nearness of someone else doing or touching us in some way can be that, whether the touch is sexual in nature or not. Especially when it's unexpected.
Hmmm... I don't know I would go back and forth on that one. 'To ask', is polite and has its charm but it also means you might get turned down.. 'To take' you might but you might also get slapped, depending. There is something to be said for either approach. I guess I'm of two minds but I go back and forth. I can make the first move but sometimes I don't want to be the one doing it, I want to be the girl and have the guy make the first move. So for me it depends on what sort of mood I'm in. But I suppose I've always in some ways always been old fashioned, I would have fit into a society where the girls were courted and guys had to prove their interest, etc. *chuckles*
I suppose because it's not always easy to tell when someone's interested. So far I've pretty much managed to make a fool of myself more often then not but at least I can say that I tried, even though nothing ever worked out.
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Yeah, I get way stuck in patterns, it's nice when they get broken up.
My daughter's aunt gave me a haircut the other day, I've always thought she was kinda cute.
She seemed so comfortable touching my head and shoulders. It was really pleasant.
Like you said, not intentionally erotic or anything, just nicely out of the ordinary.
But I did buy her bowl of her favorite, mac and cheese earlier.
...is that the kind of thing you meant?
Yeah, I guess I think there should just be an across the board rule of asking for everything sensual.
I sometimes think our idea of romance sprang from the acts of so called "extraordinary" men
who treated their woman with reverence while most around them did not.
But now that it's clear that all woman should be revered, the idea of a man who "Knows what she want's" seems presumptive.
It's funny, I think the idea of romance will be more like a role play situation in the future.
Both parties understanding they are equal under the law. But, if one chooses to be submissive and one chooses to be dominant it's ok.
And I suppose the roles could flip flop. I think it feels good to do both.
And chivalry would not be dead either, with everyone understanding the a woman should never be coerced into anything,
hearts would have to be won by things besides the suitor's physical strength.
I think there might be more moonlit serenades in the future.
Ok, now I'm getting into Rodinian Sci-Fi territory, but it is a dream world I like to imagine.
Yeah, I pretty much have no clue if someone likes me or not.
But, unlike you, rather than take a chance, I choose to never act.
I really think I need to break that pattern soon.
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There is something nice about physical contact. Just being close to someone in a none sexual atmosphere. I find it sad that such much of physical contact and interaction have become about sexuality or the implications of it or the possibility of it. I suppose it always was to some extent. But it seems sad that we can't just be physical without it meaning or being thought of as more.
I think give and take is good. But then it's funny. I think it would be nice to be wined and dined so to speak but at the same time I have a hard to excepting that from someone either. I went to lunch with a guy the other day or insisted on opening and close the car door for me...which to be honest, just seemed silly to me. But then I have a hard time letting anyone spend money on me the first few times we get together because it makes it feel more serious. And perhaps it's just the guy I had lunch with and me not wanting him to get the wrong idea because he's nice but I'm not really interested in a relationship with him... I don't know, I can't quiet sort it all out in my head.
Hmmm... I don't know I think romance springs from the idea of doing something to make someone else feel special. Perhaps it has gotten blown out of proportion in some ways but it doesn't mean that the idea is all together bad and it can go both ways. Romantic moments don't have to be initiated by the man, the women can put them together to.
In my own--albeit limited experience--I have come to a couple of conclusions. If you're interested in someone it's easier to ask earlier rather than later. That way you aren't as emotionally attached to the idea or the person as you might be. If they say no it's easier to get over and go on. The problem with this approach is that, that often makes it harder to just be friends in the end. Lol, but it's leap of faith. I might have tried it but it's never gone anywhere... I don't know if that makes it better or worse.
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Yeah it kinda sucks the physical contact always has that association with it. I probably hug my mom once in a weekend visit but more than that would seem awkward, I wonder why that is. It's easier to be affectionate with my daughter.
Yeah, I guess I really do like the ideal of the romantic man in my head. I mean if I lived in my fantasy world I'm sure I would be quite enamored of Susan Strange or Kali. I wonder why it seems kinda silly in the real world. I guess it can be more subtle in modern times. My daughters aid at school went on a long tiring with her son, when she got home her husband had taken the day off work to clean the house and make dinner for them, she said she just cried she was so moved. I have to admit I've been pretty clueless about that kind of thing in the past.
My problem is I often get interested in people that I will probably never be with, but I'm never sure how much of it is a fact or just lines I've draw in my head.
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I don't know... Once I get to know people I can be kinda affectionate but it's hard. Because I can just be 'being' friendly with someone and be willing to get a hug, or bump shoulders and sometimes people take it all the wrong way. *sigh* Often, people see that as a sign of flirting when often I'm just being nice--because I will talk to just about anyone who's willing--it has gotten me into trouble on occasion.
Hmm... It's easy to get wrapped up in our own worlds, our own wants and our own needs. Even when you live or are closely involved with someone. Often it's those little things that if we take the time to notice and do them make a big difference. I know that there are days if someone had simply been waiting at home for me with a meal prepared, a cold beer and no dishes to do, I could've cried. But, it's easy not to think about these things especially if one person in the relationship just naturally falls into the roll of doing certain tasks.
*laughs* And I don't mean that in a mean way, more as in I know how that goes. I've always been the kind of person to fall for people I know I will never have, specifically for that reason. And even when there is a connection it's hard to know if it's in your head or if it's actually there. That's why the last few times it has happened I've just gone out on a limb. A limb that didn't go anywhere but I was proud of myself for being forward. Unfortunately the last few times anyone else has shown interest... it's the people I'm nice to that I just want to be friends with but take it the wrong way. There is nothing wrong with that but it's hard when that line is crossed to deal with. I don't like telling people now but I don't want people to get the wrong idea either.
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Yeah, there are a couple friends at work that are just really sweet,
it almost feels a little flirty, but I like that kind of attention so much ( I don't get it from many.
I wouldn't want to do anything to make it awkward.
It can be frustrating but often I'm amazed how good it makes me feel to just be around adorable people,
even if I won't ever be with them.
It's inevitable that there will be failures if you take a chance.
I'm a bit of wimp, I don't take rejection very well, it makes me feel sad about myself.
So I really admire your forwardness, at least you're trying.
It's just basic odds that if you go out on a limb, once in a while, it might pay off,
but in my case, if you never try, you're almost guaranteed to find nothing.
It's such a tough call for me, part of me wants to be with someone so bad,
but I've lived so long doing pretty much what I want a lot of the time,
it would be such a mental and emotional shift to start considering another's needs.
But, I guess it depends on the other person too, if they were encouraging and inspiring
to me, I bet I could go a long way to make them happy.
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I have a number of older guy friends that I enjoy just going out for dinner with or talking with. A couple of them will go out on walks in the park with me. But it's a fine line sometimes. Because I just enjoy the company and sometimes some harmless flirting... But I have to be careful to state boundaries because just having a good time isn't always enough for people. I don't know really understand why being friends, eating good food, and having good conversation can't be enough for people. I know it's not everything but why can't that make you feel good and just enough what is there?
True. Though occasionally there are those who try from the other side. So far I've had to disappoint most of them. I've got a guy from when I took my car to the Ford dealer still bothering me. I'm going to have to figure out how to nicely cut that one up soon. I'm getting ready to throw my phone out the window otherwise. I hate it when the thing keeps going off every half an hour or so.
I know how that goes. I'd like to give a relationship a try but at the same time... I'm a very do what I want when I want sort of person. I also enjoy having my space and quiet time. Spending a lot of time around other people makes me want to hide for a few days afterwards. The guy that I'm sort of seeing right now lives two hours away. So it kinda works but at the same time it's frustrating. I don't really want to date someone who can't just come over and hang our or watch a movie whenever... But then this way when I need my space I can have it. I don't know, I honestly can't figure it out.
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Yeah, well at this point in my life, I just really enjoy female company.
Not to be too crude, but if I want to get off, I'm very capable of doing that one my own.
To talk, to walk, to appreciate who the other person is, can be a perfect evening.
It kinda sucks that all your advances seem to go nowhere,
but at the same time you're getting a bunch you don't want.
It kinda seems like the worst of both worlds.
I could change all that if you just wanted to be my...
Ok just kidding, but I bet you were scared for a second there.
Guys are pigs, why are you even messing around with them?
I thought you were gay!
Not that you have to stick to any rules, but girls seem to understand other girls so much better than the boys do.
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