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Imprisoned-Acres — Lesson Learned
Published: 2011-07-03 02:22:28 +0000 UTC; Views: 683; Favourites: 16; Downloads: 0
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*Edit* Thank you to for pointing this out to me. Guys, I know in my story at the moment, well after you read this, getting tangled in a lead rope just sounds like a joke, but honestly, it is very dangerous, and I don't want to change what I already have written, but I will be making changes to my future story. From experience I can tell you it is very, very bad to have this happen, and I wasn't even dragged. You can read a few of the comments below to hear stories of injuries, and those are minor. Please, be careful. Also, maybe to wake people up, I know some of you guys have simular stories to mine, it would be nice to share them on this deviation, so those who don't know might better understand the danger that my story fails to mention as of this point.Anyways, if you just read through all of that, high five to you, now on with the story.
Story: Well, here is day two, and after not succeeding at anything the day before, Delilah was determined to get the halter on her new horse. After much deliberation, and a sudden act of bravery, she entered the stallion's stall ready for battle, but he stood there patiently as she clipped the halter on.... Delilah wasn't sure what was going on with the horses, maybe he was just having a good day or something?
She decided to go ahead and let him out of his stall and into the pasture, but didn't open the stall door until she had wrapped the cotton lead several times around her arm in case he tried to bolt. This horse was the most expensive piece of property she owned, there was no way she was going to let him escape and hurt himself.
With a deep breath, she opened the door, and closed her eyes... Not good. Fortune's ears pricked forwards, and he bolted until he was free of the stall. Only realizing after a few strides that Delilah who hadn't been paying attention was now being dragged along behind squealing at the top of her lungs.
The confused horse slowed to a trot and continued to drag her around the yard until she was thoroughly soaked with mud. After a few minutes of her bellowing, and him dragging her around, they came to a stop in front of the house where Fortune began to help himself to the flower beds.
Delilah slowly picked herself up off the ground, and cringed from all the bruises she was sure to see in a couple days. She tentatively pulled on the lead rope when she was on her feet, this time unwrapping her wrist.
Fortune, having had his fun, looked up at her with only mild irritation, and followed a few paces behind on the way back to his stall, and would only go in when a treat was produced. Which he nearly took Delilah's hand off in the process of retrieving it.
Maybe take a break tomorrow. Delilah thought as she let herself out of the stallion's stall, and limped back to the house.
***
So for the art perspective on this, i am actually pleased with the results for the most part. The grass is a brush, but I had downloaded it from this site so long ago before I was even a member that I don't exactly remember who. If anyone knows, that would be great.
No reference was used for this picture either which makes me happy.
Anyways, I would love critique on this if anyone has any.
Thanks for looking.
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Comments: 22
Critique: don't use grass brushes! paint it yourself 
Story: She's incredibly lucky she didn't get hurt! I said in my other comment that you've done well with the story; my eyes normally glaze over at stories for pictures, but I found yours interesting and readable. I do suggest you should be sure you don't make being dragged by a horse sound too much like "lol I got pulled through mud" considering how you can get really serious injuries and amputations from wrapping a horse's leadrope around you - and people die after being dragged. I can't believe she wasn't stepped on! Hopefully she'll have better luck next time... can I suggest food bribes, or selling the horse on to a rich sucker? 
Picture: I'll just point out a few things. Overall you've got a nice sense of movement and action! In terms of anatomy, the eye is off -it needs to be just a little bigger and rounder (remember the ball of a horse's eye actually sticks out from their face). The bottom half of his face is bent sideways too much, perspective-wise - like his nose is more front on but the top of his head is more in profile. Looks like she's actually bent his face from pulling
His hooves are a little large, and have another look at the foreleg closest us - could do with being a bit thinner, it's kinda sausage-y atm.
the halter and leadrope look awesome @-@ and the back legs look good
Protip: don't use thin lines inside his body to describe muscles. I know lots of people do it (same with grass brushes) but that doesn't mean it's good. Thing is, horses DON'T have thin little lines on their bodies! If you use lines to show the sharpest shadows from muscles and want to actually pull it off, you would have to know EXACTLY where the muscles go and EXACTLY where ALL of the bulges and bumps are on a horse's body. If you put the lines in the wrong places, as you have here, all it does is shout from the rooftops that you don't know that shit.
Watch your shading and highlights - when you're showing muscles and bumps on a horse the same principle that go for lines: don't just stick random stuff in if you don't know where it goes. You've given him three big dents down his side that just aren't right. The first on his ribs just shouldn't be there at all, that whole area is his rib cage and is convex (look at a skeleton). The second is too large and high up, and should be a gradual inward curve anyway not a hole. The third is too big (and bear in mind not all horses go inward on their rumps there).
So anyway! I know this was a metric ton of crit but I'm only bothering to give it to you because I can see that you've got clear talent and creativity
hope that helps!
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As for the story line, don't worry, I do know the dangers, but *spoiler* that is for tomorrow's picture. I know all too well the dangers of it. I will actually go back after I type this though, and put in the image comments something about that though. I guess I never really thought of someone thinking that as a joke in real life though my story portrayed it. I am also going to fix his nose, and eye, though it is slightly closed to give him an irritated look. XD I know it is cartoonish.
As for the lines in the body, I never really thought of that, when I make my sketches I just go whilly nilly all over the place with my muscle lines. >.< I think I am going to go study and take more detailed pictures of my horses for reference, and try and add more detail to my shading so I can remove them all together.
XD and you hit my weakness with the ribcage because if I don't add anything then it just looks like a big empty space, and it bothers me terribly, so I just scribble something on there.
Thank you so much for all those pointers, along with some pictures I am going to take tomorrow, this critique is going to help me fix some of my problems. And I am going to make a story change to better emphasize the dangers of getting caught in a rope.
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Oh yeah, and USE PHOTO REFERENCE!
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Which is why you never tie anything horse-related to your body
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I did get my foot caught in a loop of a dog's leash. A big Great Dane, that is, and her owner called her... let's just say, the ground had a dent
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>.< the poor ground. XD lol that sounds like it hurt. I have a scar that wraps around the side of my wrist when I was loading my appaloosa into a trailer. I had the rope wraped around a post, and my hand was between the rope and the post when he pulled back. 
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We ought to bubble wrap all ropes that are used for horses
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Oh, yes. That sounds perfect
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My mum has a missing thumb because of a similar accident to yours - the leadrope tangled around the chest bar and she tried to undo it, the pony bolted backwards off the float, and yeah. Fairly gruesome! I was like NO NO DON'T DO THAT! when I got to the part in your story where she wrapped the rope around, hahah. I really like the story you've got going here, by the way
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and my friends mumu tied the leadrope around her arm as she was unloading a horse and the horse bolted backwards and she was flung over the front bar with it
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Ouch. Yeah I have a nasty scar, but luckily it was my wrist. Wow that sounds painful. cringe-worthy. lol and I am glad you like the story.
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I always have a conversation stopper-story to tell when people start swapping tales of injuries! xD
I'm watching
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>.< that is true. At least you didn't have to go through it first hand for the tale. lol it might not be worth it then. I still get shivers thinking about that. I hope I get to keep all my fingers through all the dipshit moves I pull with my horses. And thank you so much!
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XD didn't feel great.
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hope she's able to tame him.
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