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Description

Our story begins with our strange hero winning a trip to Romania on Wheel of Fortune. The trip was an all expenses paid week long stay at Castle Dimitrioff. A few weeks after the show aired, he checked the mail box and saw that his money and plane tickets had arrived. He quickly packed his things and the next day he jumped on a private plane that Wheel of Fortune provided. By the time our hero landed in Romania, he had forgotten what the castle's name was. He found the nearest map in the airport and took a look at it only to find out that everything was in Romanian. After trying to figure out what the names on the map said he spotted a name that was in English. "Castle Dimitrescu sounds close enough I guess." he shrugged. He wandered over to the taxi area but all the taxi drivers ran off once he said where he was going. So our hero had to rent a car and drive to the village by himself. A few hours later, he arrived at a snow covered ramshackle village with a giant castle in the background. Trying to figure out if this was the right place, he got out of the car to check a sign. Suddenly he heard a loud noise and turned around to see some werewolf looking creatures stealing the rental car. "Welp I guess I've got no choice but to go to castle now." he sighed.

As he walked through the village, he noticed that it was kind of quiet and the few people he saw ran inside when they saw him. After walking through the village for what seemed forever, he finally reached the castle. There was an extremely fat guy selling things outside the castle so he decided to go over and see what was for sale. "Ah welcome stranger, they call me The Duke. If you're heading into Castle Dimitrescu, you may want to look at my gun selections." suggested the Duke. "I'm here on vacation I don't think I'll need any guns." our hero explained. "Vacation? I suppose that makes sense, you are rather pale. Might you be interested in some flyswatters then? The flies tend to swarm this time of year." the Duke offered. "I'm not sure what that has to do with anything but I'll take a few I guess." Our hero bought a few flyswatters and the Duke thanked him for his patronage. He then made his way up to the castle's door and knocked on it.

"Hello? I'm here for my vacation." he yelled while knocking on the door. Inside, three women swarmed over to the window and looked outside. "Mother come quick! There's a manthing knocking on our door! Ohhh he's pale maybe he's one of Mother's cousins?" giggled the three women. "What is all of the commotion, daughters?" asked a tall lady. "Mother, one of your cousins is here on vacation." "Dear, I have no cousins. I'm not sure but I think this is just a regular man." she said while looking out the window. "Let him in so I can take a look at him." The 3 women nodded, opened the door and dragged our hero inside. Our hero started sweating when he saw a tall woman staring at him. "H-hello. I-I'm here on vacation. Here's a letter from Pat Sajak." he stammered, his hands shaking as he gave the letter to the tall lady. The tall lady barely glanced at it and said that everything looked in order. "I am Lady Dimitrescu and these are my daughters Cassandra, Bela, and Daniela." she said pointing to each of her daughters. "After a nice cup of wine, my daughters will show you to your room." she explained. "I'm more of a whiskey guy myself but that sounds good to me." he said. Lady Dimitrescu glared at him and took him to the dining room where her daughters were gulping down their wine already. Our hero sat down and tried some of the wine. He thought it tasted too irony for some reason and gave the rest to Lady Dimitrescu who didn't mind that at all.

After they finished their wine, the daughters showed (more like dragged) our hero to his room. Once there they chained him to the ceiling. "Whoa hey now I didn't know it was this kind of vacation." he chuckled. "Now then let's see what your blood tastes like." Cassandra handed Lady Dimitrescu a knife and she cut our hero's hand with it. She slowly licked the blood off of his hand a few times before taking a long drink of it. "Hmm this blood has a peculiar taste to it. Daughters, try his blood and see what you think." After her daughters bit his hand a few times they agreed that his blood tasted weird. "You should try my right hand too. Maybe there's something wrong with my left hand." suggested our hero. So Lady Dimitrescu cut open his right hand and the four women tried his blood again but found that it tasted weird still. "Oh I know what it tastes like, Mother! It tastes like that garlicky pizza the maid I sent to the dungeons, I mean fired, bought for us one time." said Bela. "Drat he must have eaten a lot of pizza before he arrived. Now we'll have to keep him here overnight." sighed Lady Dimitrescu. "Can he sleep in my room, Mother?" giggled Cassandra. "No he may not sleep in your room, Cassandra." said Lady Dimitrescu. "Mother, I think the manthing is enjoying this. He's not screaming like the others." frowned Daniela. "Hmm you might be right. He was making strange faces when we tried his blood. Cut him down at once." Lady Dimitrescu ordered. "No no wait! Ow oh no this hurts so bad." groaned our hero but they cut him down anyway and he landed on the floor with a thud. The women left the room and locked the door behind them. "This has definitely been a fun vacation so far." Our hero remembered he brought presents for everyone. He went over to his bag, took out the gifts and set them on the table for the morning. "Maybe I should've bandaged my hands up first." he said, noticing that he got blood all over the presents. He figured it would be ok though since they liked that sort of thing. He then bandaged his hands up and went to bed.

The next morning, our hero made his way downstairs and found everyone waiting for him. "I forgot to give you all your presents yesterday." he said as he gave Lady Dimitrescu something that looked like a perfume bottle, then went over to give the daughters their presents. While he was doing that, Lady Dimitrescu opened up her box and sprayed herself with what she thought was perfume. She felt her belly tighten up and asked what was in the perfume. "That wasn't perfume. That was pregspray." he explained. "Preg what? Why did you give us this in the first place?!" yelled Lady Dimitrescu. "I figured that since you're a noble you might need some heirs. Or I guess more heirs in this case." he said. Lady Dimitrescu tried to stop her daughters from spraying themselves but it was too late. She let out a moan when she felt her belly start to slowly inch out. She tried to press her belly back in but all that did was make it grow faster. Her belly grew rounder and tauter by the second. Her growing belly strained her dress more and more until the front of her dress ripped open, showing off her now heavily pregnant belly to the world. She slowly rubbed her belly and let out a loud sigh when her belly button "popped" and turned into an outie. Once her belly finally finished growing she looked overdue with at least quadruplets or maybe even more than that. It was hard to tell due to how tall she was. Meanwhile her daughters now looked like they were overdue with twins and were giggling in a corner while playfully pressing their bellies together. Amazed at the sight of such a huge belly, our hero ran over to Lady Dimitrescu and gave her belly a hug, pressing his face into her belly as well. "You disgusting manthing take your face off of my belly!" she yelled as she slapped our hero off of her belly and onto a couch, knocking him out. "Mother, you killed him! No I don't think so, he still has that weird smile on his face. Oh look he's waking up!" said the daughters. Our hero briefly woke up but passed out again after seeing four huge bellies hovering over him. Lady Dimitrescu heard her phone ring and told her daughters to take the manthing back to his room while she answered the phone. Her daughters decided that would be too much work with them being pregnant now so they left him on the couch and watched him sleep instead.

An hour later, Lady Dimitrescu's daughters left to eat lunch leaving our hero alone. Our hero woke up and seeing that he was alone, went back to his room. Back in the dining room, Lady Dimitrescu finished her phone call and told her daughters that they needed to "take care" of their guest immediately. Daniela was the first one to go since she was the oldest. Daniela waddled up the stairs and found our hero in his room. "Hehe there you are. You've been naughty and Mother has sent me to take care of you." giggled Daniela. "Hmm there are a bunch of flies flying around her. I know! I'll swat them for her to make up for being rude to her mom." our hero thought while Daniela was talking. Our hero whipped out the flyswatter the fat guy sold him and started swatting away at the flies. "N-no quit that! W-why does that feel so good?" stammered Daniela as she fell to her knees. Lady Dimitrescu started getting worried that Daniela hadn't returned yet so she sent Bela to help her sister. Bela entered the room and saw her sister on the floor moaning while being swatted by our hero. Our hero saw flies around Bela also so he quickly whipped out the other flyswatter and started swatting Bela also. "Stop that! No, wait keep going!" moaned Bela. The minutes passed by with no word from Bela or Daniela so Cassandra was sent to check on them. "Manthing! What are you doing to my sisters and why wasn't I invited?" gasped Cassandra. "Oh no she has flies around her too. I need to think of something." Our hero thought for a second then came up with a brilliant idea. He put two flyswatters in his right hand, grabbed another flyswatter with his left hand and then started swatting all three of the women at the same time. "Daniela! Cassandra! Bela! Are you alright?" called out Lady Dimitrescu to no response. "Oh must I do everything myself?" She stomped up the stairs and barged into the room to see her daughters rolling on the floor moaning while our hero was swatting them like he was playing the drums. "Swat me hard! Swat my belly next! No swat mine next!" her daughters moaned. "Daughters go to your room at once! I am very disappointed in you." "As for you manthing you have until I calm my daughters down to hide because if I catch you you will be very sorry." threatened Lady Dimitrescu. She then stormed/waddled off with her daughters.

Our hero then bravely decided he didn't need to hide and valiantly walked across the hall into the library to wait for Lady Dimitrescu to return. Our hero was sitting down in a chair with his feet up and was reading 101 Blood Pudding Recipes when Lady Dimitrescu came back. Our hero noticed her and waved at her. "Hello there. I found some recipes that I might try to make for you all some time." he said. "What's the matter with you? Everyone else either runs away from me or tries to shoot me but you're just sitting here reading." she asked. Our hero shrugged after she said that. "I mean you're not really scary especially with that." he said pointing at her belly. Lady Dimitrescu stood there speechless for a while with her hands on her belly before saying, "I know you said you won a trip here but did Mother Miranda really send you here just to annoy me? Or are you just weird?" "I don't know any Mother Mirandas so I guess I'm just weird." he said. Lady Dimitrescu muttered that she needed a relaxing (blood)bath, then told him not to break anything before leaving. Our hero went to bed himself after reading for a while longer.

The next morning, Lady Dimitrescu felt refreshed after her bath and a good night's sleep. She managed to find an old sleeveless maternity dress that was tight fitting but still loose enough that her belly wouldn't rip it. Unfortunately for her, her belly had gotten so big that the dress only went down to above her knees instead of down to the ground. "It's way too short but at least it fits." sighed Lady Dimitrescu. She made her way downstairs and saw Cassandra waiting for her. "Mother, come see the neat trick the manthing can do!" giggled Cassandra. "I don't have time for games. Mother Miranda has summoned me to a very important meeting and I have to leave earlier than usual due to my condition." Lady Dimitrescu frowned while drumming her fingers on her belly. Cassandra pouted until Lady Dimitrescu gave in and followed her into the next room. There our hero was sitting in a chair with Bela and Daniela standing next to him with their bellies next to his head. "Mother's here. Let's show her the trick!" grinned Cassandra. Bela and Daniela grinned back at her and then rubbed their bellies against our hero's head making blood shoot out of his nose and into Cassandra's mouth. "Hehe I bet he would fill a whole bucket up if he saw you wearing that dress, Mother." giggled Cassandra, licking her lips. "I don't need a bucket now but a wine glass will do nicely." she smiled as she held out a wine glass. Cassandra rubbed her belly against our hero and her mother's wine glass was quickly filled. She thanked her daughters then emptied the wine glass. "Mmm his blood definitely tastes better than the other day. Maybe I'll have some more." she thought. Lady Dimitrescu stood in front of our hero, showing off her dress to him. As soon as our hero saw her dress, he started making strange noises and a huge amount of blood shot out of his nose, filling up half the bucket Cassandra was carrying. Lady Dimitrescu dipped her wine glass into the bucket, drank two more glasses then told her daughters to drink the rest. "Now then girls, watch the manthing until I get back and make sure he doesn't get into any trouble." she ordered as she left for the meeting.

At Mother Miranda's lair, the meeting had already begun without Lady Dimitrescu. At the meting was a guy wearing sunglasses and a hat named Heisenberg, a lady named Donna who had a creepy doll, and a weird fish man named Moreau. "Even though we're still missing a certain someone, I'm starting this meeting. Does anyone have any ideas for my grand plan?" asked Mother Miranda. Moreau gave her a piece of paper that said Plan 2 bother Ethun Winners on it along with some stick figures. "That's real nice, I'll look at it later. Anyone else?" No one answered her though and they all sat around awkwardly until Lady Dimitrescu showed up finally. She waddled over to her chair and plopped down in it. She huffed and puffed a bit then apologized for being late. "Hahaha looks like you've stopped growing up and started growing out." laughed Heisenberg. "Alcina, what happened to you?" asked Mother Miranda. Lady Dimitrescu glared at Heisenberg then explained what all had happened the last few days. "Bring him here to me at once. I must try this pregspray out for myself." ordered Mother Miranda. "Are you sure Mother Miranda? He's a bit strange." asked Lady Dimitrescu. "Yes I am very sure. Now hurry up and bring him here." she said. Lady Dimitrescu was too pregnant and too tired to walk all the way back to her castle so she called her daughters and told them to bring him to the meeting place instead. A while later our hero and the daughters showed up. The daughters brought him to the middle of the room then stood behind Lady Dimitrescu.

"Alcina told me all about her mishap with your pregspray and just by looking at her I can tell it can be useful to me." said Mother Miranda. She then asked how the pregspray works. "Well I found out that instead of healing you like the other herbs do if you eat them, purple herbs make women pregnant if they eat them. So I cut the herbs up and made a spray out of them and as you can see it works." our hero explained. "You also can add DNA into the spray to make a clone, make someone the dad or whatever else you want ." he added. "Wait a minute! Your blood was all over the bottles you gave us. Does that mean you got us pregnant?" Lady Dimitrescu interrupted. Our hero sweated a bit then said yes. Lady Dimitrescu let out a loud oh no and her daughters swarmed over to calm her down. Heisenberg started laughing so hard he fell out of his chair. Annoyed by the interruptions, Mother Miranda told everyone to shut up and they did just that. She took out a DNA vial and handed it to our hero. "Use the DNA I just gave you and use your pregspray on me." ordered Mother Miranda.

"I don't know if I should. I like Lady Dimitrescu but the rest of you seem kind of suspicious." our hero said. "If you spray me I'll let you join our family. That way you can live with Alcina forever." Mother Miranda bribed. "Mother Miranda I must protest!" Lady Dimitrescu shouted before being told to be quiet. This was the easiest decision of our hero's life and he rushed over to Mother Miranda and sprayed her with the pregspray. Mother Miranda's belly quickly swelled out until she looked like she was 9 months pregnant. She began laughing when her water broke, which was some sort of black liquid. "Uh I don't think that black liquid-" our hero started but was cut off. "Stop. Talking. Go and claim your prize." Mother Miranda said in a dangerous tone of voice. Our hero then made a hasty strategic withdrawal over to Lady Dimitrescu. Before going off into her lair to give birth, Mother Miranda gave some final orders. Donna was to start growing purple herbs in her garden, Heisenberg was to stop making zombie robots and start making pregspray in his factory instead, Lady Dimitrescu was to welcome our hero into the family, and Moreau was to go be stupid some place else. "I feel like I helped her take over the world or something." our hero said. "She just wanted her daughter back. That's all. Now hold still, this might hurt a bit." said Lady Dimitrescu as she grabbed our hero, bit his neck and started sucking.

The next thing our hero remembered was waking up on a couch. "Mother are you sure it worked? He doesn't look any different." asked Bela. Our hero suddenly fell off the couch and started shambling around groaning about bellies. "Oh no you sucked him off so much that he turned into a zombie." gasped Daniela. "Phrasing, dear. And I think he's just being weird again." sighed Lady Dimitrescu. "Shall I fetch the shotgun to make sure, Mother?" asked Cassandra. "No, no, I'm fine I think." nervously laughed our hero who started rubbing his neck. Lady Dimitrescu looked over our hero and said "Hmm your glowing eyes look a bit creepy but other than that you don't look too bad. You look much better than you did as a human." "That's good to hear anyway." he said. "Try my wine again just to make sure everything is in order." said Lady Dimitrescu as she handed our hero a wine glass. He gulped it down and said it didn't taste irony anymore like it did before. "You're one of us now. I guess we'll find out if that's a good or bad thing soon enough." she said. "Hey I guess I need a vampire name now. How about Count Manthing?" our hero laughed. The daughters thought it was a good name but Lady Dimitrescu didn't really say much of anything.

A week later, pregspray was flying off the shelves all over village and even in neighboring villages. "You know, I'm actually impressed you managed to convince the Duke to give people discounts if they donated blood. How ever did you do that?" asked Lady Dimitrescu while drinking a cup of blood tea. "Oh it was easy. I made him some burgers and fried chicken that he enjoyed so much that he agreed to the deal." our hero explained while also drinking blood tea. "Hmm maybe turning into a vampire made him smarter." Lady Dimitrescu thought. "Of course. I really do appreciate you making it easier for us to find blood especially in our conditions. In fact I will allow you to hug my belly as a reward." she said. She regretted saying that though as our hero pressed his face into her belly and gave it a hug. "Count Manthing, I must remind you of what happened the last time you did that." she warned. "I'm sorry but your belly is too big to hug without me pressing my face into it." our hero apologized while lifting his head up before pressing it into her belly again. Lady Dimitrescu sighed and let him hug her belly, deciding that slapping our hero away again would be too much effort since he would enjoy it anyway.

In the end, everyone was happy or at least slightly annoyed. And so ends the story of Count Manthing, a hero to us all.

"Well, I thought your autobiography was... interesting, but did you really have to put that ending hero line in there?" asked Lady Dimitrescu, who was now pregnant with her seventh daughter. "I didn't really want to but Mother Miranda told me to put in there because of how happy she was about having her daughter back." Count Manthing said as Lady Dimitrescu handed him the manuscript back. "Uh-huh. Well I suppose your book should do fine. It can't be any worse than Donna's puppet show and everyone seems to like that." she said. "I guess you're right. It can't be any worse than that." Count Manthing agreed. Suddenly the three daughters burst into the room. "Mother, our sisters ate all the waffles and blood syrup before we could get any!" cried Bela. "And our daughters refused to eat any and ate fruit instead. Please help us out!" pleaded Daniela. "Oh I'm so disappointed that our daughters are fruit flies." sighed Cassandra. "Girls, I am very busy right now. You'll have to take care of it yourself." Lady Dimitrescu said. "Yes, mother." they sighed as they went back to the kitchen. "Now then I have a favor to ask of you. I had too much blood pudding so if you don't mind, would you please rub my sore belly." Lady Dimitrescu smiled. "Yes Ma'am!" Count Manthing grinned. He sat on the couch next to her and rubbed her belly for the rest of the afternoon and for the years to come.

A special thanks to BustyBabes3D for making the cover picture and for previewing the story.

Thanks to ZERO-THL Kyubits Pacci-d for previewing the story also.

I hope you enjoy the story! If not that's cool too!

Description

Our story begins with our strange hero winning a trip to Romania on Wheel of Fortune. The trip was an all expenses paid week long stay at Castle Dimitrioff. A few weeks after the show aired, he checked the mail box and saw that his money and plane tickets had arrived. He quickly packed his things and the next day he jumped on a private plane that Wheel of Fortune provided. By the time our hero landed in Romania, he had forgotten what the castle's name was. He found the nearest map in the airport and took a look at it only to find out that everything was in Romanian. After trying to figure out what the names on the map said he spotted a name that was in English. "Castle Dimitrescu sounds close enough I guess." he shrugged. He wandered over to the taxi area but all the taxi drivers ran off once he said where he was going. So our hero had to rent a car and drive to the village by himself. A few hours later, he arrived at a snow covered ramshackle village with a giant castle in the background. Trying to figure out if this was the right place, he got out of the car to check a sign. Suddenly he heard a loud noise and turned around to see some werewolf looking creatures stealing the rental car. "Welp I guess I've got no choice but to go to castle now." he sighed.

As he walked through the village, he noticed that it was kind of quiet and the few people he saw ran inside when they saw him. After walking through the village for what seemed forever, he finally reached the castle. There was an extremely fat guy selling things outside the castle so he decided to go over and see what was for sale. "Ah welcome stranger, they call me The Duke. If you're heading into Castle Dimitrescu, you may want to look at my gun selections." suggested the Duke. "I'm here on vacation I don't think I'll need any guns." our hero explained. "Vacation? I suppose that makes sense, you are rather pale. Might you be interested in some flyswatters then? The flies tend to swarm this time of year." the Duke offered. "I'm not sure what that has to do with anything but I'll take a few I guess." Our hero bought a few flyswatters and the Duke thanked him for his patronage. He then made his way up to the castle's door and knocked on it.

"Hello? I'm here for my vacation." he yelled while knocking on the door. Inside, three women swarmed over to the window and looked outside. "Mother come quick! There's a manthing knocking on our door! Ohhh he's pale maybe he's one of Mother's cousins?" giggled the three women. "What is all of the commotion, daughters?" asked a tall lady. "Mother, one of your cousins is here on vacation." "Dear, I have no cousins. I'm not sure but I think this is just a regular man." she said while looking out the window. "Let him in so I can take a look at him." The 3 women nodded, opened the door and dragged our hero inside. Our hero started sweating when he saw a tall woman staring at him. "H-hello. I-I'm here on vacation. Here's a letter from Pat Sajak." he stammered, his hands shaking as he gave the letter to the tall lady. The tall lady barely glanced at it and said that everything looked in order. "I am Lady Dimitrescu and these are my daughters Cassandra, Bela, and Daniela." she said pointing to each of her daughters. "After a nice cup of wine, my daughters will show you to your room." she explained. "I'm more of a whiskey guy myself but that sounds good to me." he said. Lady Dimitrescu glared at him and took him to the dining room where her daughters were gulping down their wine already. Our hero sat down and tried some of the wine. He thought it tasted too irony for some reason and gave the rest to Lady Dimitrescu who didn't mind that at all.

After they finished their wine, the daughters showed (more like dragged) our hero to his room. Once there they chained him to the ceiling. "Whoa hey now I didn't know it was this kind of vacation." he chuckled. "Now then let's see what your blood tastes like." Cassandra handed Lady Dimitrescu a knife and she cut our hero's hand with it. She slowly licked the blood off of his hand a few times before taking a long drink of it. "Hmm this blood has a peculiar taste to it. Daughters, try his blood and see what you think." After her daughters bit his hand a few times they agreed that his blood tasted weird. "You should try my right hand too. Maybe there's something wrong with my left hand." suggested our hero. So Lady Dimitrescu cut open his right hand and the four women tried his blood again but found that it tasted weird still. "Oh I know what it tastes like, Mother! It tastes like that garlicky pizza the maid I sent to the dungeons, I mean fired, bought for us one time." said Bela. "Drat he must have eaten a lot of pizza before he arrived. Now we'll have to keep him here overnight." sighed Lady Dimitrescu. "Can he sleep in my room, Mother?" giggled Cassandra. "No he may not sleep in your room, Cassandra." said Lady Dimitrescu. "Mother, I think the manthing is enjoying this. He's not screaming like the others." frowned Daniela. "Hmm you might be right. He was making strange faces when we tried his blood. Cut him down at once." Lady Dimitrescu ordered. "No no wait! Ow oh no this hurts so bad." groaned our hero but they cut him down anyway and he landed on the floor with a thud. The women left the room and locked the door behind them. "This has definitely been a fun vacation so far." Our hero remembered he brought presents for everyone. He went over to his bag, took out the gifts and set them on the table for the morning. "Maybe I should've bandaged my hands up first." he said, noticing that he got blood all over the presents. He figured it would be ok though since they liked that sort of thing. He then bandaged his hands up and went to bed.

The next morning, our hero made his way downstairs and found everyone waiting for him. "I forgot to give you all your presents yesterday." he said as he gave Lady Dimitrescu something that looked like a perfume bottle, then went over to give the daughters their presents. While he was doing that, Lady Dimitrescu opened up her box and sprayed herself with what she thought was perfume. She felt her belly tighten up and asked what was in the perfume. "That wasn't perfume. That was pregspray." he explained. "Preg what? Why did you give us this in the first place?!" yelled Lady Dimitrescu. "I figured that since you're a noble you might need some heirs. Or I guess more heirs in this case." he said. Lady Dimitrescu tried to stop her daughters from spraying themselves but it was too late. She let out a moan when she felt her belly start to slowly inch out. She tried to press her belly back in but all that did was make it grow faster. Her belly grew rounder and tauter by the second. Her growing belly strained her dress more and more until the front of her dress ripped open, showing off her now heavily pregnant belly to the world. She slowly rubbed her belly and let out a loud sigh when her belly button "popped" and turned into an outie. Once her belly finally finished growing she looked overdue with at least quadruplets or maybe even more than that. It was hard to tell due to how tall she was. Meanwhile her daughters now looked like they were overdue with twins and were giggling in a corner while playfully pressing their bellies together. Amazed at the sight of such a huge belly, our hero ran over to Lady Dimitrescu and gave her belly a hug, pressing his face into her belly as well. "You disgusting manthing take your face off of my belly!" she yelled as she slapped our hero off of her belly and onto a couch, knocking him out. "Mother, you killed him! No I don't think so, he still has that weird smile on his face. Oh look he's waking up!" said the daughters. Our hero briefly woke up but passed out again after seeing four huge bellies hovering over him. Lady Dimitrescu heard her phone ring and told her daughters to take the manthing back to his room while she answered the phone. Her daughters decided that would be too much work with them being pregnant now so they left him on the couch and watched him sleep instead.

An hour later, Lady Dimitrescu's daughters left to eat lunch leaving our hero alone. Our hero woke up and seeing that he was alone, went back to his room. Back in the dining room, Lady Dimitrescu finished her phone call and told her daughters that they needed to "take care" of their guest immediately. Daniela was the first one to go since she was the oldest. Daniela waddled up the stairs and found our hero in his room. "Hehe there you are. You've been naughty and Mother has sent me to take care of you." giggled Daniela. "Hmm there are a bunch of flies flying around her. I know! I'll swat them for her to make up for being rude to her mom." our hero thought while Daniela was talking. Our hero whipped out the flyswatter the fat guy sold him and started swatting away at the flies. "N-no quit that! W-why does that feel so good?" stammered Daniela as she fell to her knees. Lady Dimitrescu started getting worried that Daniela hadn't returned yet so she sent Bela to help her sister. Bela entered the room and saw her sister on the floor moaning while being swatted by our hero. Our hero saw flies around Bela also so he quickly whipped out the other flyswatter and started swatting Bela also. "Stop that! No, wait keep going!" moaned Bela. The minutes passed by with no word from Bela or Daniela so Cassandra was sent to check on them. "Manthing! What are you doing to my sisters and why wasn't I invited?" gasped Cassandra. "Oh no she has flies around her too. I need to think of something." Our hero thought for a second then came up with a brilliant idea. He put two flyswatters in his right hand, grabbed another flyswatter with his left hand and then started swatting all three of the women at the same time. "Daniela! Cassandra! Bela! Are you alright?" called out Lady Dimitrescu to no response. "Oh must I do everything myself?" She stomped up the stairs and barged into the room to see her daughters rolling on the floor moaning while our hero was swatting them like he was playing the drums. "Swat me hard! Swat my belly next! No swat mine next!" her daughters moaned. "Daughters go to your room at once! I am very disappointed in you." "As for you manthing you have until I calm my daughters down to hide because if I catch you you will be very sorry." threatened Lady Dimitrescu. She then stormed/waddled off with her daughters.

Our hero then bravely decided he didn't need to hide and valiantly walked across the hall into the library to wait for Lady Dimitrescu to return. Our hero was sitting down in a chair with his feet up and was reading 101 Blood Pudding Recipes when Lady Dimitrescu came back. Our hero noticed her and waved at her. "Hello there. I found some recipes that I might try to make for you all some time." he said. "What's the matter with you? Everyone else either runs away from me or tries to shoot me but you're just sitting here reading." she asked. Our hero shrugged after she said that. "I mean you're not really scary especially with that." he said pointing at her belly. Lady Dimitrescu stood there speechless for a while with her hands on her belly before saying, "I know you said you won a trip here but did Mother Miranda really send you here just to annoy me? Or are you just weird?" "I don't know any Mother Mirandas so I guess I'm just weird." he said. Lady Dimitrescu muttered that she needed a relaxing (blood)bath, then told him not to break anything before leaving. Our hero went to bed himself after reading for a while longer.

The next morning, Lady Dimitrescu felt refreshed after her bath and a good night's sleep. She managed to find an old sleeveless maternity dress that was tight fitting but still loose enough that her belly wouldn't rip it. Unfortunately for her, her belly had gotten so big that the dress only went down to above her knees instead of down to the ground. "It's way too short but at least it fits." sighed Lady Dimitrescu. She made her way downstairs and saw Cassandra waiting for her. "Mother, come see the neat trick the manthing can do!" giggled Cassandra. "I don't have time for games. Mother Miranda has summoned me to a very important meeting and I have to leave earlier than usual due to my condition." Lady Dimitrescu frowned while drumming her fingers on her belly. Cassandra pouted until Lady Dimitrescu gave in and followed her into the next room. There our hero was sitting in a chair with Bela and Daniela standing next to him with their bellies next to his head. "Mother's here. Let's show her the trick!" grinned Cassandra. Bela and Daniela grinned back at her and then rubbed their bellies against our hero's head making blood shoot out of his nose and into Cassandra's mouth. "Hehe I bet he would fill a whole bucket up if he saw you wearing that dress, Mother." giggled Cassandra, licking her lips. "I don't need a bucket now but a wine glass will do nicely." she smiled as she held out a wine glass. Cassandra rubbed her belly against our hero and her mother's wine glass was quickly filled. She thanked her daughters then emptied the wine glass. "Mmm his blood definitely tastes better than the other day. Maybe I'll have some more." she thought. Lady Dimitrescu stood in front of our hero, showing off her dress to him. As soon as our hero saw her dress, he started making strange noises and a huge amount of blood shot out of his nose, filling up half the bucket Cassandra was carrying. Lady Dimitrescu dipped her wine glass into the bucket, drank two more glasses then told her daughters to drink the rest. "Now then girls, watch the manthing until I get back and make sure he doesn't get into any trouble." she ordered as she left for the meeting.

At Mother Miranda's lair, the meeting had already begun without Lady Dimitrescu. At the meting was a guy wearing sunglasses and a hat named Heisenberg, a lady named Donna who had a creepy doll, and a weird fish man named Moreau. "Even though we're still missing a certain someone, I'm starting this meeting. Does anyone have any ideas for my grand plan?" asked Mother Miranda. Moreau gave her a piece of paper that said Plan 2 bother Ethun Winners on it along with some stick figures. "That's real nice, I'll look at it later. Anyone else?" No one answered her though and they all sat around awkwardly until Lady Dimitrescu showed up finally. She waddled over to her chair and plopped down in it. She huffed and puffed a bit then apologized for being late. "Hahaha looks like you've stopped growing up and started growing out." laughed Heisenberg. "Alcina, what happened to you?" asked Mother Miranda. Lady Dimitrescu glared at Heisenberg then explained what all had happened the last few days. "Bring him here to me at once. I must try this pregspray out for myself." ordered Mother Miranda. "Are you sure Mother Miranda? He's a bit strange." asked Lady Dimitrescu. "Yes I am very sure. Now hurry up and bring him here." she said. Lady Dimitrescu was too pregnant and too tired to walk all the way back to her castle so she called her daughters and told them to bring him to the meeting place instead. A while later our hero and the daughters showed up. The daughters brought him to the middle of the room then stood behind Lady Dimitrescu.

"Alcina told me all about her mishap with your pregspray and just by looking at her I can tell it can be useful to me." said Mother Miranda. She then asked how the pregspray works. "Well I found out that instead of healing you like the other herbs do if you eat them, purple herbs make women pregnant if they eat them. So I cut the herbs up and made a spray out of them and as you can see it works." our hero explained. "You also can add DNA into the spray to make a clone, make someone the dad or whatever else you want ." he added. "Wait a minute! Your blood was all over the bottles you gave us. Does that mean you got us pregnant?" Lady Dimitrescu interrupted. Our hero sweated a bit then said yes. Lady Dimitrescu let out a loud oh no and her daughters swarmed over to calm her down. Heisenberg started laughing so hard he fell out of his chair. Annoyed by the interruptions, Mother Miranda told everyone to shut up and they did just that. She took out a DNA vial and handed it to our hero. "Use the DNA I just gave you and use your pregspray on me." ordered Mother Miranda.

"I don't know if I should. I like Lady Dimitrescu but the rest of you seem kind of suspicious." our hero said. "If you spray me I'll let you join our family. That way you can live with Alcina forever." Mother Miranda bribed. "Mother Miranda I must protest!" Lady Dimitrescu shouted before being told to be quiet. This was the easiest decision of our hero's life and he rushed over to Mother Miranda and sprayed her with the pregspray. Mother Miranda's belly quickly swelled out until she looked like she was 9 months pregnant. She began laughing when her water broke, which was some sort of black liquid. "Uh I don't think that black liquid-" our hero started but was cut off. "Stop. Talking. Go and claim your prize." Mother Miranda said in a dangerous tone of voice. Our hero then made a hasty strategic withdrawal over to Lady Dimitrescu. Before going off into her lair to give birth, Mother Miranda gave some final orders. Donna was to start growing purple herbs in her garden, Heisenberg was to stop making zombie robots and start making pregspray in his factory instead, Lady Dimitrescu was to welcome our hero into the family, and Moreau was to go be stupid some place else. "I feel like I helped her take over the world or something." our hero said. "She just wanted her daughter back. That's all. Now hold still, this might hurt a bit." said Lady Dimitrescu as she grabbed our hero, bit his neck and started sucking.

The next thing our hero remembered was waking up on a couch. "Mother are you sure it worked? He doesn't look any different." asked Bela. Our hero suddenly fell off the couch and started shambling around groaning about bellies. "Oh no you sucked him off so much that he turned into a zombie." gasped Daniela. "Phrasing, dear. And I think he's just being weird again." sighed Lady Dimitrescu. "Shall I fetch the shotgun to make sure, Mother?" asked Cassandra. "No, no, I'm fine I think." nervously laughed our hero who started rubbing his neck. Lady Dimitrescu looked over our hero and said "Hmm your glowing eyes look a bit creepy but other than that you don't look too bad. You look much better than you did as a human." "That's good to hear anyway." he said. "Try my wine again just to make sure everything is in order." said Lady Dimitrescu as she handed our hero a wine glass. He gulped it down and said it didn't taste irony anymore like it did before. "You're one of us now. I guess we'll find out if that's a good or bad thing soon enough." she said. "Hey I guess I need a vampire name now. How about Count Manthing?" our hero laughed. The daughters thought it was a good name but Lady Dimitrescu didn't really say much of anything.

A week later, pregspray was flying off the shelves all over village and even in neighboring villages. "You know, I'm actually impressed you managed to convince the Duke to give people discounts if they donated blood. How ever did you do that?" asked Lady Dimitrescu while drinking a cup of blood tea. "Oh it was easy. I made him some burgers and fried chicken that he enjoyed so much that he agreed to the deal." our hero explained while also drinking blood tea. "Hmm maybe turning into a vampire made him smarter." Lady Dimitrescu thought. "Of course. I really do appreciate you making it easier for us to find blood especially in our conditions. In fact I will allow you to hug my belly as a reward." she said. She regretted saying that though as our hero pressed his face into her belly and gave it a hug. "Count Manthing, I must remind you of what happened the last time you did that." she warned. "I'm sorry but your belly is too big to hug without me pressing my face into it." our hero apologized while lifting his head up before pressing it into her belly again. Lady Dimitrescu sighed and let him hug her belly, deciding that slapping our hero away again would be too much effort since he would enjoy it anyway.

In the end, everyone was happy or at least slightly annoyed. And so ends the story of Count Manthing, a hero to us all.

"Well, I thought your autobiography was... interesting, but did you really have to put that ending hero line in there?" asked Lady Dimitrescu, who was now pregnant with her seventh daughter. "I didn't really want to but Mother Miranda told me to put in there because of how happy she was about having her daughter back." Count Manthing said as Lady Dimitrescu handed him the manuscript back. "Uh-huh. Well I suppose your book should do fine. It can't be any worse than Donna's puppet show and everyone seems to like that." she said. "I guess you're right. It can't be any worse than that." Count Manthing agreed. Suddenly the three daughters burst into the room. "Mother, our sisters ate all the waffles and blood syrup before we could get any!" cried Bela. "And our daughters refused to eat any and ate fruit instead. Please help us out!" pleaded Daniela. "Oh I'm so disappointed that our daughters are fruit flies." sighed Cassandra. "Girls, I am very busy right now. You'll have to take care of it yourself." Lady Dimitrescu said. "Yes, mother." they sighed as they went back to the kitchen. "Now then I have a favor to ask of you. I had too much blood pudding so if you don't mind, would you please rub my sore belly." Lady Dimitrescu smiled. "Yes Ma'am!" Count Manthing grinned. He sat on the couch next to her and rubbed her belly for the rest of the afternoon and for the years to come.

A special thanks to BustyBabes3D for making the cover picture and for previewing the story.

Thanks to ZERO-THL Kyubits Pacci-d for previewing the story also.

I hope you enjoy the story! If not that's cool too!