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Theophilia — What to do with Drunk Templars

Published: 2010-11-12 05:11:47 +0000 UTC; Views: 7796; Favourites: 67; Downloads: 38
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Description "What do you do with a Drunken Templar?"
October 27th, 2010
Pencil and pen

What do you do with a drunken Templar?

Take him on a tour of the brothels of Antioch, of course! (That is, if you're a certain Andronicus Comnenus). And, this WAS a scene from the book. And I laughed.

And deviantART needs to allow for longer title spaces.

"Goodness graciousness, Sir Templar Knight! Thou hast been assailed by Lust!"*

Okay, everyone all together now: 1, 2, 3: AWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!! POOR GODFREY!!!!

You are cruel Andronicus, so very, very cruel...Don't you just want to hug that poor guy (Godfrey that is, not Andronicus. )?! Andronicus has no compassion for the poor tempted celibate.

Sooooooo.....this takes place after Andronicus asks Godfrey if he wants to tour Antioch and they're hanging out and being Drinking Buddies . So, what's the first stop on the tour? Andronicus' favorite brothels.

Wow.

Like I said, he's terribly cruel. Godfrey's not THAT drunk Andronicus (that is, he's not drunk enough to throw his vows of celibacy to the wind)... awww....Poor Godfrey. Oh yeah, and that's his cloak he's pulling over his head, to shield his gaze from temptation. *VIRGIN EYES!! VIIIIRGIN EYES!!!*


Hookers:

Andronicus: "Hey, hey, HEY???!!!"

Godfrey: "Yea, though I walk through the dark valley, I shall fear no evil...."


RUN GODFREY!!! RUN!!!! BRAVELY RUN AWAY, AWAY!!!!!!

Blame my little sister for this (and, well, all of the totally random but somehow hilariously appropriate modern pop songs that *somehow* pertain to the pictures I draw), but....it *is* rather perfect for Andronicus: [link]

"Womanizer, woman-womanizer, you're a womanizer,
Oh womanizer, oh you're a womanizer, baby
You you you are, you you you are
Womanizer, womanizer, womanizer (womanizer)

Boy don't try to front
I (I) know just (just) what you are-are-are
Boy don't try to front
I (I) know just (just) what you are-are-are"


And, note to self: Perspective takes a long time. Never attempt it AGAIN.

*Credit for that one goes to ~ThatOneGuy92 'ppreciate it very much sir.


Other Crown of the World inspired pieces:

The Crown of the World
25 Expressions: Godfrey de Montferrat
Malik, Godfrey and Jacques sketch
Oh Godfrey
Poor Jacques
An (almost) Friendless Templar
A Serenading Saracen
Godfrey meets Baldwin IV
Well, this is awkward
A Beef with Gerard de Ridefort
Godfrey's Singing
Dreams of Chivalry
Dormez-vous?
Godfrey and Baldwin-Calvin and Hobbes Style
Godfrey de Montferrat, Knight of the Temple
Boys will be Boys
Drinking Buddies
What do you do with a Drunken Templar?
Chibi Godfrey
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Comments: 79

Theophilia In reply to ??? [2023-07-17 04:28:52 +0000 UTC]

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ZigNaj [2021-05-25 02:13:05 +0000 UTC]

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ariodante28 [2013-10-08 06:53:36 +0000 UTC]

Templar + manga sparkle. You have made my evening! 

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Theophilia In reply to ariodante28 [2013-10-08 15:22:17 +0000 UTC]

Hahaha, thank you!

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Mahira-MCAquila [2011-08-05 01:14:37 +0000 UTC]

I don't know the story this is from, but this is hilarious! The expressions make this....and the description helps Poor bloke...nice work with the perspective!

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Theophilia In reply to Mahira-MCAquila [2011-08-05 13:51:39 +0000 UTC]

Hahah, thank you! It's from "Crown of the World" the same book that all these comic pages are coming from. This is, of course, later in the book though.

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Mahira-MCAquila In reply to Theophilia [2011-08-05 14:20:07 +0000 UTC]

You're welcome ^^ I see!

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Gryffgirl [2011-06-07 01:18:46 +0000 UTC]

LOL--I love their faces! Andronicus sparkles! Poor Godfrey looks like he's on the verge of a nervous breakdown--poor lad! I spy some rats!

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Theophilia In reply to Gryffgirl [2011-06-09 21:46:01 +0000 UTC]

Hahahahah! Why thank you! Yes, Andronicus is quite the sparkly meanie. Poor Godfrey. I think he is on the verge of a mental breakdown.

Yep, lots of little ratsies.

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Aodhagain [2011-01-30 01:43:38 +0000 UTC]

"Poor fellow..." (The Pirates of Penzance). Poor Gaw-fwee. At least he has the decency to remember his vows, unlike a certain nameless individual of the same order of "religious-gentlemen-soldier-horsemen" as Godfrey here...

Hehehehe... Andronicus.

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Theophilia In reply to Aodhagain [2011-01-30 22:17:39 +0000 UTC]

Heeheehee.... Oh that just made me laugh. Pirates of Penzance is fabulous.

Not only does he simply remember his vows, I think he is very, painfully conscious of them.

Heh. Yes. Andronicus may be just a little too fun to draw.

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Aodhagain In reply to Theophilia [2011-01-30 23:34:51 +0000 UTC]

"With catlike tread, upon our prey we steal! in silence dread, our cautious way we feel!"

Imagine that! A Templar in a story actually conscious of his vows and the fact that he is a warrior monk.

Oh, has Andronicus won you over too? The womanizer.....

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Theophilia In reply to Aodhagain [2011-01-31 00:53:05 +0000 UTC]

What would make that line hilarious if it were the hookers saying it.

Hookers: "With catlike tread, upon our prey we steal! in silence dread, our cautious way we feel!"

Godfrey: NOOOOOO!!!!!!

Andronicus:

OH I KNOW RIGHT???!!! Especially when it comes to most Templar fiction novels out there...

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Aodhagain In reply to Theophilia [2011-01-31 00:59:54 +0000 UTC]

LOLOL...

I'm suddenly reminded of that scene from Michael Collins... "Some died for Ireland, Dev, he whored for Ireland!"

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Theophilia In reply to Aodhagain [2011-01-31 01:24:22 +0000 UTC]

Best line from that movie. Or definitely up there. "Hullo, what d'ya eat for breakfast?"

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Aodhagain In reply to Theophilia [2011-01-31 01:35:51 +0000 UTC]

"Well, now what? Do I get to wear that hat?"

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haius [2010-12-31 00:17:33 +0000 UTC]

Andronicus is like Ashton Kutcher: pretty but obnoxious. And also full of himself.

POOOOOOOOOOR Godfrey.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Theophilia In reply to haius [2011-01-07 18:24:05 +0000 UTC]

BEST.

ANALOGY.

EVER.

All the more so because it is so terribly true.

And yes, poor little persecuted Templar. And not even for having to put up with the hookers, most of all for having to put up with Ashto--I mean, Andronicus.

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haius In reply to Theophilia [2011-01-10 21:22:21 +0000 UTC]

So who's Andronicus's Demi Moore?

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Theophilia In reply to haius [2011-01-10 22:54:24 +0000 UTC]

Hmmmm....that's a toughie. Let me see....

I don't really know, he had so many mistresses... Well, Aston Kutcher married Demi Moore, so let's see....Andronicus married Anna of France when she was about 12 and he was 65....but before that he had a bunch of affairs with various cousins and nieces of his'. Nice guy, eh?

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haius In reply to Theophilia [2011-01-11 05:49:17 +0000 UTC]

NIECES? Nothin' like a little incest to liven things up a bit! DX

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Theophilia In reply to haius [2011-01-12 01:16:54 +0000 UTC]

Yeah, well, it is Andronicus. Is anyone really suprised?

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haius In reply to Theophilia [2011-01-12 01:24:12 +0000 UTC]

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Theophilia In reply to haius [2011-01-14 17:26:50 +0000 UTC]



And that is an amazing plz account.

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blackcat101 [2010-12-07 18:54:27 +0000 UTC]

I like this one mostly for the face of Andronicus. So funny. As if he knew what he were doing to him...

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Theophilia In reply to blackcat101 [2010-12-07 18:56:00 +0000 UTC]

Oh, I think he knows....

Heeheeheheheh, thank you very much! ^^

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Inarigamer [2010-12-03 23:59:10 +0000 UTC]

what to do with a drunken templar? put him in with the captains daughter xD

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Theophilia In reply to Inarigamer [2010-12-04 03:11:41 +0000 UTC]

Heheheheheh....poor Godfrey.

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Inarigamer In reply to Theophilia [2010-12-04 03:25:10 +0000 UTC]

oh indeed

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Theophilia In reply to Inarigamer [2010-12-04 03:30:16 +0000 UTC]

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VeniceGirl [2010-12-02 00:25:55 +0000 UTC]

LOL
Their expressions are great!! XD
... I feel like I should put this book on my to-read list.

👍: 0 ⏩: 2

Theophilia In reply to VeniceGirl [2011-01-03 01:58:14 +0000 UTC]

Sorry, not "Crown of the World", I meant "Ivanhoe." "Crown of the World" is not slow, Ivanhoe is. My bad.

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VeniceGirl In reply to Theophilia [2011-01-03 16:14:00 +0000 UTC]

Oh, lolol. XD That's fine.

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Theophilia In reply to VeniceGirl [2010-12-04 03:13:57 +0000 UTC]

Heheheheh, why thank you! ^^

Oh you definitely should. I'm just warning you, it's very slow, and the Victorian prose is overloaded and budensome, but you get used to it eventually, and then it just adds to the hilarity.

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FaeTian [2010-11-27 16:58:29 +0000 UTC]

Awwww, poor Godfrey indeed! I love his expression though. PRICELESS.

And Andronicus's pose is hilarious too. Nicely done!

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Theophilia In reply to FaeTian [2010-11-28 01:31:32 +0000 UTC]

*pets* Poor little Templar.

Heeheehee, thank you! ^^ Andronicus was, as always, very fun to draw.

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FaeTian In reply to Theophilia [2010-11-28 02:00:43 +0000 UTC]

Hehe, you're more then welcome! I like these Templar drawings of yours.

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Theophilia In reply to FaeTian [2010-11-28 15:05:07 +0000 UTC]

*gets all warm and fuzzy inside*

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FireFiriel [2010-11-25 05:48:55 +0000 UTC]

This is so funny and a great use of setting and perspective! This would make a very impressive comic panel.

I gotta say tho, I never expected you to draw a bunch of hookers....

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Theophilia In reply to FireFiriel [2010-11-28 01:30:37 +0000 UTC]

HAHAHAHHA, why thank you!!! The perspective was like...GAH! (well, it always is for me. ) Thanks! ^^ It might, if I hadn't gotten so darn lazy on the cross-hatching, especially in the background.

Hmmm, yeah.... Can't say I really expected it myself. I thought it would help explain poor Godfrey's mortification though.

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FireFiriel In reply to Theophilia [2010-11-29 05:21:33 +0000 UTC]

Very welcome! Perspective is always tough.

Hehehe. Poor Godfrey.

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Theophilia In reply to FireFiriel [2010-11-30 19:41:00 +0000 UTC]



Poor little Templar indeed...

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Lykex [2010-11-19 02:35:08 +0000 UTC]

Pff, brothels. They're no fun. If I were to ever get sucked into some medieval fantasy, you'd sooner find me making rats out of the local rogues... literally. q:

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Theophilia In reply to Lykex [2010-11-20 23:55:43 +0000 UTC]

Hahahah, turning rogues into rats would be an engaging and fun pastime.

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Lykex In reply to Theophilia [2010-11-24 01:25:15 +0000 UTC]

I'd probably get in a wee bit trouble myself though since I doubt Templars would get along with Wizards... or Ninjas, or kung-fu Monks (random those suddenly sound).

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Theophilia In reply to Lykex [2010-11-24 17:15:08 +0000 UTC]

Well, I suppose the closest thing to ninjas back in the Holy Land during the Middle Ages were the Hashashin. Which...I doubt the Templars were on terribly friendly terms with them.

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Lykex In reply to Theophilia [2010-11-25 13:53:54 +0000 UTC]

Aah yes... the assassins. >B)

The Arabian counterpart to ninjas as samurai are the Japanese counterpart to knights. Despite how impossible it would be for such warriors to ever meet, it nevertheless amuses me to imagine how such an encounter would turn out.

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Theophilia In reply to Lykex [2010-11-25 19:45:57 +0000 UTC]

Hahahah, I totally agree with that.

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elavoria [2010-11-14 16:30:25 +0000 UTC]

Hahaha! The perspective turned out great! I love their expressions; they're so perfect! I love the little ratties, too.

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Theophilia In reply to elavoria [2010-11-17 21:32:27 +0000 UTC]

Well shucks, thanks! ^^ It takes a bloody long time to do though. And I'm pretty sure you're the only person who commented on the rats. They were a bit of an after-thought though. I just wanted the place to look more dismal and back-alley than it already did.

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