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Description
MerMay 2021 - 19

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I'd like to say it's difficult to come up with anything new, but rather than a limitation in imagination or difficulty finding inspiration or ideas I think there's something else that's holding me back. I think I've mostly (not entirely) got myself to not get discouraged or grow jealous of others' masterful works, instead turning that to further inspiration and motivation to get better。

I'm not sure how to best describe this, but I have caught myself thinking about how others perceive my work, whether it would be acceptable or permissible to draw something in such a way. I know, I've seen the advices and quotes like: "You can't please everybody" or "If you try to make everyone happy, you make nobody happy" and whatever variation of those. Maybe I do want to draw something over-sexualized, or something something gory, or offensive, or uncomfortable. Maybe even draw furries. Idk.

Maybe this MerMay challenge has kinda exhausted me, as I strive to crank out as many artworks within a month or so. Maybe it's this social media culture I've found myself in, having to share every piece of art I make and post it online sometimes feels like shouting to the void just to make myself heard and hoping for a reply or answer, like a dancer who must perform before an audience and receive their validation to know whether one's efforts and performance have borne fruit.

This isn't me trying to disparage social media or anything, for an introvert like me it's been a useful avenue that has allowed me to make connections I could never make otherwise. I guess it's mostly because I haven't met anyone face-to-face with whom I get to discuss and share my interests in, and even then I probably wouldn't know what to say or react to them. Because who can safely say they've found someone they can share not just your interests or plans or ideas, but also your darkest desires, fetishes, and inner demons?

Thanks for coming to my TED talk

Description
MerMay 2021 - 19

=====

I'd like to say it's difficult to come up with anything new, but rather than a limitation in imagination or difficulty finding inspiration or ideas I think there's something else that's holding me back. I think I've mostly (not entirely) got myself to not get discouraged or grow jealous of others' masterful works, instead turning that to further inspiration and motivation to get better。

I'm not sure how to best describe this, but I have caught myself thinking about how others perceive my work, whether it would be acceptable or permissible to draw something in such a way. I know, I've seen the advices and quotes like: "You can't please everybody" or "If you try to make everyone happy, you make nobody happy" and whatever variation of those. Maybe I do want to draw something over-sexualized, or something something gory, or offensive, or uncomfortable. Maybe even draw furries. Idk.

Maybe this MerMay challenge has kinda exhausted me, as I strive to crank out as many artworks within a month or so. Maybe it's this social media culture I've found myself in, having to share every piece of art I make and post it online sometimes feels like shouting to the void just to make myself heard and hoping for a reply or answer, like a dancer who must perform before an audience and receive their validation to know whether one's efforts and performance have borne fruit.

This isn't me trying to disparage social media or anything, for an introvert like me it's been a useful avenue that has allowed me to make connections I could never make otherwise. I guess it's mostly because I haven't met anyone face-to-face with whom I get to discuss and share my interests in, and even then I probably wouldn't know what to say or react to them. Because who can safely say they've found someone they can share not just your interests or plans or ideas, but also your darkest desires, fetishes, and inner demons?

Thanks for coming to my TED talk