HOME | DD

Description
watch this ;

one two three four
i am knocking on your door.

five six seven eight
i am the girl that you hate.

.

she's always there [no matter
where i go] -
inside mirrors, outside doors [in
my mind, in my bones, in my
soul].

she tells me that my skeleton is
made of steel [because that is
stronger than wrought iron],
and that i have to stand up
straight, even know this
misery is crushing me [and
she knows exactly how to stop it,
but i have to bear it-
because i have bones so stainless, a
heart so cold, lungs so empty and devoid.]

.

no matter how far i run
[she is always there inside my mind]

no matter where i try to hide
[she is always ready to find me]

.

she [i] am the reason you check [look]
under your beds for monsters [demons].

.

i told myself that ghosts were just angels
without the pomp and ceremony and fanfare.
i told myself that nothing could harm me
as long as i was asleep. i told myself so much
and yet here i am, hurt wounded vulnerable.

and i have to wonder,
was it worth it?

[and she will always answer yes, because that
monster of mine will always be ready to make
me cry for mercy, ready to suffocate me under
the pressure of being as perfect as her, as perfect
as i have been, could be, should be. she will
always tell everyone to watch this, because
i should always act as if my every move was
being watched, because that meant i could
never fall to pieces without an audience to
scorn me].

Description
watch this ;

one two three four
i am knocking on your door.

five six seven eight
i am the girl that you hate.

.

she's always there [no matter
where i go] -
inside mirrors, outside doors [in
my mind, in my bones, in my
soul].

she tells me that my skeleton is
made of steel [because that is
stronger than wrought iron],
and that i have to stand up
straight, even know this
misery is crushing me [and
she knows exactly how to stop it,
but i have to bear it-
because i have bones so stainless, a
heart so cold, lungs so empty and devoid.]

.

no matter how far i run
[she is always there inside my mind]

no matter where i try to hide
[she is always ready to find me]

.

she [i] am the reason you check [look]
under your beds for monsters [demons].

.

i told myself that ghosts were just angels
without the pomp and ceremony and fanfare.
i told myself that nothing could harm me
as long as i was asleep. i told myself so much
and yet here i am, hurt wounded vulnerable.

and i have to wonder,
was it worth it?

[and she will always answer yes, because that
monster of mine will always be ready to make
me cry for mercy, ready to suffocate me under
the pressure of being as perfect as her, as perfect
as i have been, could be, should be. she will
always tell everyone to watch this, because
i should always act as if my every move was
being watched, because that meant i could
never fall to pieces without an audience to
scorn me].