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Description
Someone posted this internet-famous fanfic on a forum that was pretty awful, and in it, whomever had written it originally had either accidentally or purposely mixed up the words "masticating" and "masturbating".

Someone in the ME LJ comm brought up meal times aboard the Normandy, and then this kind of happened.

EDIT: Unfortunately, it wasn't a fanfic, just a discussion, as awesome as this would have been!

And although Tali and Garrus can share the same food (nutrient paste in a turian shelter? nom noms) I figured that it's Garrus' way of teasing her, that she can technically eat it, but it's not in some sterilized squeeze tube form. It'd be like having your jaw wired shut, and your buddy having delicious Italian food.... *tear*

Description
Someone posted this internet-famous fanfic on a forum that was pretty awful, and in it, whomever had written it originally had either accidentally or purposely mixed up the words "masticating" and "masturbating".

Someone in the ME LJ comm brought up meal times aboard the Normandy, and then this kind of happened.

EDIT: Unfortunately, it wasn't a fanfic, just a discussion, as awesome as this would have been!

And although Tali and Garrus can share the same food (nutrient paste in a turian shelter? nom noms) I figured that it's Garrus' way of teasing her, that she can technically eat it, but it's not in some sterilized squeeze tube form. It'd be like having your jaw wired shut, and your buddy having delicious Italian food.... *tear*