HeatherTheSkelter [2010-09-24 00:16:09 +0000 UTC]
"Even with her steadfast call Clint could not fine the confidence within himself to stand once again." You mean "find" not "fine".
"Once it became apparent that he was no longer being compliant the wind seemed to calm just enough to offer hope again. Seeing now that his journey was not hopeless, he attempted to follow the call again, but just as he stood up the wind began to howl and return to its former velocity, almost knocking him to the ground." This hope/ wind thing is interesting but confusing. Maybe take it out or clarify.
"The more he resisted, the louder her desperate calls got" I don't think you specified earlier that it was a female voice. When you first mention the voice, I would advise making it a very strong thing grammatically, as well as making it clear what feelings the voice sparks intitially in Clint.
"Being fade up he propped himself up slightly and yelled with animosity," Fed up?
"waiting to surcome to its hold" succumb?
"With no warning, the ground vibrated as if something large landed right beside him. " I would make this a new paragraph.
Good ideas, gotta run to class, my biggest suggestion is to work on making the grammar and punctuation work with you in order to make the scene like come alive... and stuff. gotta run...
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