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SVespiary ā Nemesis: You'll burn first
#nemesis #yandere #yanderechan #yanderesimulator #yanderesim #yandere_simulator #yandere_chan #nemesischan #nemesischanyandere #nemesis_chan #nemesis_contest
Published: 2016-12-04 02:09:02 +0000 UTC; Views: 2666; Favourites: 86; Downloads: 13
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Description
Hello again, fellas!Here's the final version of my Nemesis contest entry! Hope the gasoline canister answers some of the questions related to my last submission
You can find a different version of it on my tumblr A good friend of mine said he likes this one (the original) more because of its "noir" colours.
I'm sorry for the wrong perspective on the background! I was afraid I won't have enough time to finish this work, so the houses are just screenshots from the game.
upd: I realized that she reminds me of Cinder Fall from RWBY, but it was too late xDD
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Comments: 11
In six words. watch hell break loose. *Clears throat* Oka and Nemesis can be sisters!
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I guess all things have to come to an end.
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Hi, mate! I saw your comment on the result thingy, asking for a critique. I'm not gonna claim I know how to do anything, but maybe you'll find my two cents helpful!
Overall, the image is very good, it gets the point across very well - Ayano was just being the lovely murderer she normally is, but then a more powerful enemy appeared - Nemesis-chan. That's great, the point of the nemesis is to be exactly that, so I think you got the story down quite nicely.
What bothers me most is the actual presentation. When I look at the image my eyes immediately go to Nemesis-chan, but stay there, so I noticed very quickly that she doesn't really look like she belongs in the scene. This is either happening on a very dark, rainy day or a rainy evening/night, so there is no real way for her to be lit so brightly and evenly. And it doesn't seem like any of the rain is in front of her? Maybe it's because the colours would be too similar (which is kind of a problem if you ask me). It is quite a jump form the nemesis' legs to Yan-chan's hand (the nearest bright thing) and what seems to be a bit of a problem here is that she's not blurred evenly. Even if you wanted, let's say the knife, as it is the farthest away from the camera, not to be blurry, her hand wouldn't be as well since she's holding it.
You've mentioned you think the perspective is wrong, but it's actually very hard to tell what the correct one would be. If we take Nemesis-chan as our guide, her shoes point to a horizon line somewhere about mid-thigh, but the rest of her is flat in that regard. And if we take Ayano as an example for the perspective.. well she would have very, very long legs but the horizon line would be somewhere above her, so I think we can work with that.
And from Ayano's legs... the anatomy should be mentioned. It's very consistant, so props for that, but as with the legs, there seems to be a problem with Nemesis-chan's right fore arm - it's longer than the left despite them both having been drawn straight in front of her torso. That also creates a funny tangent, it looks like she has a veeeery long middle finger, when it's just in front of a part of the fence. With such a heavy rain the background elements would be very off-black, so even if you decided to make both of her arms this long, they would show up well against the usually grey/black fence.
With that - back to the presentation. The blur is supposed to create some sense of depth, but in my opinion, it doesn't reeeeally do that and it's actually quite distracting. The composition is alright, but I'd advise you to look into 'The rule of thirds', which gives some very nice suggestions for placement of your points of interest. I think the image would feel way better and a bit easier to look at if the characters had more room to breathe and weren't placed so close to the edges of the image.
Ā
Here is how I think I'd handle a picture like this -Ā prnt.sc/dg6c9s
I chose a dark night for the time/setting, and with that I've increased the contrast, changed the composition slightly, tweaked the perspective, pushed back the BG, touched up the anatomy and the pose of Nemesis-chan a tiny bit, changed Ayano's pose a bit and added more colour to the rain, but this is a very quick paint over so it looks more like snow. Oh well, you know what it's supposed to be. ~(^o^)~
This is how I think it would look better, so there is some preference in there, but I hope you still consider my critisism. I'm in no way a masterful artist or something like that, I just tried to apply what I've learned so far on my 'artistic journey'. Keep working on your art, we all have room to improve! ^.^
PS: Sorry if there are any typos or the grammar is a bit awkward at times!
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Reminds me of Karma.Ā www.youtube.com/watch?v=tX0J-zā¦
Now you've used up all your luck,
It's time to get what you deserve,
I'm holding out for Karma,
I'm holding out to watch you burn!
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Wow, this sounds great, thank you for showing me this song! I didn't know about it before, but the song is really kind of associated with my drawing
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I've been addicted to it ever since I first heard it!
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It's beginning to seem like I'm addicted too
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