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Description
I let it fall, my heart,
And as it fell you rose to claim it
It was dark and I was over
Until you kissed my lips and you saved me.

Eyes wet and fingers trembling, she reached her hand up to the door, managing one weak knock before all of her adrenaline-fueled strength left her, and she collapsed beside it.

But it was enough, because a moment later, she heard footsteps, footsteps that had become so achingly, lovingly familiar so quickly, and she had just enough energy to turn her face up as the door slid open, a shaky smile working its way to her lips as she greeted the golden-eyed beauty who stepped out.

"I did it," she said, and she couldn't believe it even now, how easy it had been to tell them she was leaving, how easy it had been to walk away from the only life she'd ever known in this big, unforgiving city in order to give herself utterly and wholly to this woman she'd only just met. "I left. I'm yours."

And she knew then that she'd never regret it for as long as she lived.

My hands, they were strong
But my knees were far too weak,
To stand in your arms
Without falling to your feet.

In all of her life, she had never been as happy as she had been now, simply lying in bed next to this woman who had stolen her heart - once, not very long ago, she would have doubted that she'd even had enough of a heart left to steal. But the seer had taken up the shards, each shattered piece carefully and painstakingly set back into place until she once again felt whole.

But there were times, when she would look, and she would see those eyes that she loved so well look past her, far away in a place she could never reach, and she would feel cold and inexplicably alone, even with the woman sitting right beside her. In those moments, she was the weakest she had ever been, the weakest she would ever be, because how could you stand beside the person you loved most and yet be completely unable to help them?

But there's a side to you
That I never knew, never knew.
All the things you'd say
They were never true, never true,
And the games you play
You would always win, always win.

She'd never thought it would end, and certainly not that way. But in the span of a single moment, watching that back walk away from her had sent her entire world crashing down around her.

Those days were spent in numb, dream-like succession, void even of pain to break the monotony. Her head told her to hate, but her heart could feel nothing, dulled and empty where love and adoration had once filled it near to bursting.

But I set fire to the rain,
Watched it pour as I touched your face,
Well, it burned while I cried
'Cause I heard it screaming out your name, your name!

She came to her, then, like a dream vision - perhaps it was more like a nightmare. At least, she thought that's what it was when the cold golden eyes locked on hers that night. She shifted, slowly pushing herself up as she desperately chased the sleep from her mind, hoping and dreading that it was not a dream.

But no, she was there, with that cruel smile that had come to haunt her sleepless nights. A quick step and then she was only a breath away, and she didn't know whether she should shout, or fight back, or simply fall into her arms like her traitorous heart so desperately wanted.

"You're still mine."

"I'm not."

"You can tell yourself that, but even now, as you look at me with those pathetic eyes, you and I both know you are."

And she was right.

Her hand reached up to cup her chin, and a moment later, she was gone, and all that was left was her crying her name after her.

When I lay with you
I could stay there
Close my eyes
Feel you here forever
You and me together
Nothing is better.

A winter wind blew in with the sun of a clear day, but here in bed it hardly mattered. Her eyes opened to meet the tanned face, amber eyes looking back at her, and she could see the depths of her love mirrored there. She was different now, scarlet hair darkened to ebony and that empty, otherworldly light forever gone from her eyes, but her adoration was unchanged.

She smiled, and let her hand drop to rest between them, and a smile answered her as the other warm hand reached up to twine their fingers together.

If there was no heaven, if there was only this, here and now, then that would be alright.

'Cause there's a side to you
That I never knew, never knew,
All the things you'd say,
They were never true, never true,
And the games you play
You would always win, always win.

A darkness enveloped her heart, so deep and black that she nearly choked with it, and then the pain was gone, and she turned to look back at the bounty hunter with a gaze as cold as ice. A chilled smile lifted at her lips, and with a few cruel words, she was gone, leaving a shocked face behind her.

Once, she'd tried to hate her for leaving her to go with that evil man and she'd been unable to muster it - she could muster it now, and it enveloped her with such a sensuousness that even now, like this, she was just slightly afraid of it.

When they met again, the blackness had enveloped her as well, a disease that was worming its way through the hearts of the city, and even like that, they couldn't be quite free of each other.

Sometimes I wake up by the door,
That heart you caught must be waiting for you
Even now when we're already over
I can't help myself from looking for you.

There was heat, but she couldn't feel it. Could she feel it? She thought, in the back of her mind, that the house might be burning down around them, but how could that matter? How could that matter now as she looked down at the woman in her arms as she tried to smile up at her, reassuring to the last. She was choking, she was drowning, she must have been, how else could -- a shaking hand reached up to wipe away a tear, and she might have tried to say something . . .

" - couldn't let you get hurt."

"Why did you - "

"Shhh. Shhh, love. At least I get to . . . staring into your eyes."

"Please - "

"Beautiful . . ."

I set fire to the rain,
Watched it pour as I touched your face,
Well, it burned while I cried
'Cause I heard it screaming out your name, your name

What did it matter now? Red lips smiled gently up at her - was that lipstick, or blood? - but the light in the eyes had gone, and with that, every thing she was, every thing she had ever been or ever would be -

- slipped away.

I set fire to the rain,
And I threw us into the flames
Where it felt something die
'Cause I knew that that was the last time, the last time, oh!

The last thing she knew was her hands holding her beloved, her life, her heart, tenderly in her arms, the blistering cold raging around her to combat the flames as slowly, slowly, her world faded to an icy blackness.

"Wait for me."

She would wait.

"You saved me once."

She'd been saved so many times.

"I'm coming after you."

Oh no!
Let it burn, oh
Let it burn
Let it burn

"The part I really loved, was chasing her."

- - -

Cioko is one of my most beloved characters. I don't know if I've ever had the pleasure of playing a woman who's grown and changed so much, who's loved so fiercely and lost so deeply. I don't think I knew when I made her that I would connect so strongly with her, and with her story.

And now she's dying, and I feel a little of myself going with her, but that's okay, because she's going to continue to grow, and I still have her, she's just a little different. More for me to play with and learn about.

From the first time I heard this song, I thought it was her song, hers and Amaterasu's. I wanted to set the moments of her life to the lyrics, a progression of being chased after and chasing, of hurting and hating and, most importantly, of loving. Amaterasu was her life, and there was no way she wasn't going to follow after her.

The last quote at the end is from the ending line of Millenium Actress, a brilliant movie from which I drew much of my inspiration from Cioko in the first place. I thought it described her love affair with Amaterasu quite well.

Description
I let it fall, my heart,
And as it fell you rose to claim it
It was dark and I was over
Until you kissed my lips and you saved me.

Eyes wet and fingers trembling, she reached her hand up to the door, managing one weak knock before all of her adrenaline-fueled strength left her, and she collapsed beside it.

But it was enough, because a moment later, she heard footsteps, footsteps that had become so achingly, lovingly familiar so quickly, and she had just enough energy to turn her face up as the door slid open, a shaky smile working its way to her lips as she greeted the golden-eyed beauty who stepped out.

"I did it," she said, and she couldn't believe it even now, how easy it had been to tell them she was leaving, how easy it had been to walk away from the only life she'd ever known in this big, unforgiving city in order to give herself utterly and wholly to this woman she'd only just met. "I left. I'm yours."

And she knew then that she'd never regret it for as long as she lived.

My hands, they were strong
But my knees were far too weak,
To stand in your arms
Without falling to your feet.

In all of her life, she had never been as happy as she had been now, simply lying in bed next to this woman who had stolen her heart - once, not very long ago, she would have doubted that she'd even had enough of a heart left to steal. But the seer had taken up the shards, each shattered piece carefully and painstakingly set back into place until she once again felt whole.

But there were times, when she would look, and she would see those eyes that she loved so well look past her, far away in a place she could never reach, and she would feel cold and inexplicably alone, even with the woman sitting right beside her. In those moments, she was the weakest she had ever been, the weakest she would ever be, because how could you stand beside the person you loved most and yet be completely unable to help them?

But there's a side to you
That I never knew, never knew.
All the things you'd say
They were never true, never true,
And the games you play
You would always win, always win.

She'd never thought it would end, and certainly not that way. But in the span of a single moment, watching that back walk away from her had sent her entire world crashing down around her.

Those days were spent in numb, dream-like succession, void even of pain to break the monotony. Her head told her to hate, but her heart could feel nothing, dulled and empty where love and adoration had once filled it near to bursting.

But I set fire to the rain,
Watched it pour as I touched your face,
Well, it burned while I cried
'Cause I heard it screaming out your name, your name!

She came to her, then, like a dream vision - perhaps it was more like a nightmare. At least, she thought that's what it was when the cold golden eyes locked on hers that night. She shifted, slowly pushing herself up as she desperately chased the sleep from her mind, hoping and dreading that it was not a dream.

But no, she was there, with that cruel smile that had come to haunt her sleepless nights. A quick step and then she was only a breath away, and she didn't know whether she should shout, or fight back, or simply fall into her arms like her traitorous heart so desperately wanted.

"You're still mine."

"I'm not."

"You can tell yourself that, but even now, as you look at me with those pathetic eyes, you and I both know you are."

And she was right.

Her hand reached up to cup her chin, and a moment later, she was gone, and all that was left was her crying her name after her.

When I lay with you
I could stay there
Close my eyes
Feel you here forever
You and me together
Nothing is better.

A winter wind blew in with the sun of a clear day, but here in bed it hardly mattered. Her eyes opened to meet the tanned face, amber eyes looking back at her, and she could see the depths of her love mirrored there. She was different now, scarlet hair darkened to ebony and that empty, otherworldly light forever gone from her eyes, but her adoration was unchanged.

She smiled, and let her hand drop to rest between them, and a smile answered her as the other warm hand reached up to twine their fingers together.

If there was no heaven, if there was only this, here and now, then that would be alright.

'Cause there's a side to you
That I never knew, never knew,
All the things you'd say,
They were never true, never true,
And the games you play
You would always win, always win.

A darkness enveloped her heart, so deep and black that she nearly choked with it, and then the pain was gone, and she turned to look back at the bounty hunter with a gaze as cold as ice. A chilled smile lifted at her lips, and with a few cruel words, she was gone, leaving a shocked face behind her.

Once, she'd tried to hate her for leaving her to go with that evil man and she'd been unable to muster it - she could muster it now, and it enveloped her with such a sensuousness that even now, like this, she was just slightly afraid of it.

When they met again, the blackness had enveloped her as well, a disease that was worming its way through the hearts of the city, and even like that, they couldn't be quite free of each other.

Sometimes I wake up by the door,
That heart you caught must be waiting for you
Even now when we're already over
I can't help myself from looking for you.

There was heat, but she couldn't feel it. Could she feel it? She thought, in the back of her mind, that the house might be burning down around them, but how could that matter? How could that matter now as she looked down at the woman in her arms as she tried to smile up at her, reassuring to the last. She was choking, she was drowning, she must have been, how else could -- a shaking hand reached up to wipe away a tear, and she might have tried to say something . . .

" - couldn't let you get hurt."

"Why did you - "

"Shhh. Shhh, love. At least I get to . . . staring into your eyes."

"Please - "

"Beautiful . . ."

I set fire to the rain,
Watched it pour as I touched your face,
Well, it burned while I cried
'Cause I heard it screaming out your name, your name

What did it matter now? Red lips smiled gently up at her - was that lipstick, or blood? - but the light in the eyes had gone, and with that, every thing she was, every thing she had ever been or ever would be -

- slipped away.

I set fire to the rain,
And I threw us into the flames
Where it felt something die
'Cause I knew that that was the last time, the last time, oh!

The last thing she knew was her hands holding her beloved, her life, her heart, tenderly in her arms, the blistering cold raging around her to combat the flames as slowly, slowly, her world faded to an icy blackness.

"Wait for me."

She would wait.

"You saved me once."

She'd been saved so many times.

"I'm coming after you."

Oh no!
Let it burn, oh
Let it burn
Let it burn

"The part I really loved, was chasing her."

- - -

Cioko is one of my most beloved characters. I don't know if I've ever had the pleasure of playing a woman who's grown and changed so much, who's loved so fiercely and lost so deeply. I don't think I knew when I made her that I would connect so strongly with her, and with her story.

And now she's dying, and I feel a little of myself going with her, but that's okay, because she's going to continue to grow, and I still have her, she's just a little different. More for me to play with and learn about.

From the first time I heard this song, I thought it was her song, hers and Amaterasu's. I wanted to set the moments of her life to the lyrics, a progression of being chased after and chasing, of hurting and hating and, most importantly, of loving. Amaterasu was her life, and there was no way she wasn't going to follow after her.

The last quote at the end is from the ending line of Millenium Actress, a brilliant movie from which I drew much of my inspiration from Cioko in the first place. I thought it described her love affair with Amaterasu quite well.