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LexiWynn — The Keys
Published: 2011-09-30 12:19:02 +0000 UTC; Views: 185; Favourites: 6; Downloads: 2
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Description
Five of black for seven whitea dull ringing of the lonely noise
Filling the world with their empty please
Gathering dust on each and every night.
Notes might sing like the cries of angels
But for me they are the callings of demons
With sharps that stab me deep inside
And flats that push the light away
The world turns the corner and waits
For a show of music too wonderful to see
I pour my soul onto the board
But the Keys won't play for me.
Comments: 7
Oh and if you want I'd be more than happy to fix the piano Keys for you
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Haha it was supposed to be more metaphorical, not necessarily that they Keys are broken, but that the person playing them is. That they're trying to find some false ideal of being good at something when all they really need is love.
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Wow.... Almost leave me speechless... I love your style and I have certainly learned something new. I can see you playing the piano while writing this
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I love the way you wrote "empty please" at the second line -- both pleas and please, the notion of begging in multiple ways to be heard, to be recognized, to be appreciated (like comments 
The second stanza is interesting, the imagery here is pretty straight-forward, but it almost seems too blunt and is in contrast to the first and third stanza -- as if you're explaining what the metaphor is rather than simply showing it through subtlety, you know what I mean?
The third stanza is wonderful however, "I pour my soul onto the board / But the Keys won't play for me." You capitalize "Keys" because they have become a proper noun now, they are now the subject of the poem, a character as it were. They have a mind of their own, vicariously living through your own desires (or lack thereof). "For a show of music too wonderful to see" -- playing with dual notions again, to see you playing the piano, but also to "see" the sound music -- and both won't be seen because the notes drop silent before they reach any ears. Good stuff Lexi!
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Thank you so much!!! And thanks for the watch!!! I'm really glad you took the time to read my work! ^^
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every poem deserves a chance to be read with thoughtfulness, right? Just glad I could have the opportunity to show that thoughtfulness!
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