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kiwi-damnation β€” DFC 2015: 1. Outliving Fear
#dfc #sardine #decemberformchallenge
Published: 2015-12-01 12:37:33 +0000 UTC; Views: 2226; Favourites: 71; Downloads: 0
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Description When darkness rips away her joy
With claws that flay and deftly tear,
Her bones and sinew are laid bare
As lifeless as a tattered toy,
Her heartbeat gently pulses quick
Beneath that skin like porcelain,
Each slash breeds more adrenaline
As palms grow slick and breath constricts,
Her eyes see nothing but the pain,
Her very sanity is slain,
But as she clutches onto hope
And feels the fibres of her rope,
She knows that daylight’s face is near
Which means she will outlive the fear.
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Comments: 72

kiwi-damnation In reply to ??? [2017-06-12 21:46:54 +0000 UTC]

Thank you very much . I am still here because I live by one statement "Never make lasting decisions when emotional". It has worked well for me. I just wanted to illustrate the battles that PTSD throws at you, and how clinging to life - even a little - is an accomplishment.

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TheLunaLily In reply to kiwi-damnation [2017-07-03 00:26:38 +0000 UTC]

I'm glad that you were able to get that message out there in such a clear and eloquent way.

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kiwi-damnation In reply to TheLunaLily [2017-07-09 00:41:13 +0000 UTC]

Thank you very much You are wonderful.

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TheLunaLily In reply to kiwi-damnation [2017-07-28 19:39:11 +0000 UTC]

You are very much welcome and wonderful.

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cholie [2016-11-27 04:30:06 +0000 UTC]

So, I totally dig the message of this poem. The flow and rhythm are amazing! I've been reading it out loud.

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kiwi-damnation In reply to cholie [2016-11-27 13:12:41 +0000 UTC]

Thank you beautiful . <3 I appreciate it.Β 

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cholie In reply to kiwi-damnation [2016-11-27 18:31:10 +0000 UTC]

My pleasure, gorgeous!!!! You're so very welcome!!!

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C-A-Harland [2016-05-02 21:21:51 +0000 UTC]

This was incredibly powerful. Amazing piece.

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kiwi-damnation In reply to C-A-Harland [2016-05-02 21:26:03 +0000 UTC]

Wow thank you very much

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Think-Indifferently [2016-03-10 12:38:52 +0000 UTC]

I wish more people would write in traditional poetry forms.
I love the poem, and you've also given me someone to look up to as a poet
Maybe one day I'll be s good as you.

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kiwi-damnation In reply to Think-Indifferently [2016-03-10 21:45:41 +0000 UTC]

Aww thank you . Well if you're interested in creating more fixed form/traditional poetry, you should check out my group ProjectDFC . This piece was written for our December challenge DFC, where we write 31 poems in the month, or one a day for all of December. This month is Middle Eastern March, focussing on Middle Eastern forms. Next month is Alphabetic April, focussing on alphabetic sequence forms .

Thank you again . We also have form charts/guides in our Featured Gallery that demonstrate how to write over a hundred and thirty different form poetry pieces.

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Think-Indifferently In reply to kiwi-damnation [2016-03-10 22:21:07 +0000 UTC]

Thanks, I actually joined up after I read the piece, haha.
Some of the forms sound really fun!

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kiwi-damnation In reply to Think-Indifferently [2016-03-11 02:21:14 +0000 UTC]

Yay glad to have you

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Master-of-the-Boot [2016-02-24 06:23:58 +0000 UTC]

I think it's an amazing piece of art, definitely not happy but still profound.Β 

I've never suffered mental illness of any sort but I've felt personal pain and loss in my life. I want to extend you all my support and my admittedly limited understanding.Β 

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kiwi-damnation In reply to Master-of-the-Boot [2016-02-24 08:17:57 +0000 UTC]

Thank you so much. It isn't happy but I guess at the end it is lighter as it shows that just outliving something is enough sometimes .

thank you.

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psycocat [2016-01-20 15:39:09 +0000 UTC]

Congrats on the DD. This is tragic but lovely. I can't imagine what you've got PTSD from but I'm so sorry you do. Though I do also see hope in this. "Outliving Fear" is something we all can do.

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kiwi-damnation In reply to psycocat [2016-01-20 22:47:07 +0000 UTC]

Thank you. Yeah it sucks. I have C-PTSD from many many things. This piece was after a particularly bad episode where I spent a night just wishing it would leave me and did everything I could possibly think of to calm myself. I focused on the fact that episodes are temporary whereas actions can be permanent and waited for daylight to arrive. I knew, as I have before, that I just had to outlive the fear.

That's all we ever have to do. Just stay standing long enough for it to leave.

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psycocat In reply to kiwi-damnation [2016-01-21 09:32:21 +0000 UTC]

I just looked up what C-PTSD meant.Β  Wow.Β  I don't need details at all, but that sucks.Β  I'm sorry you had to go through whatever you did, but you can make it.Β  If you ever need help get it.Β  I can willing to do what I can (though I know it is limited).Β  Keep up the good work.

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kiwi-damnation In reply to psycocat [2016-01-21 10:27:14 +0000 UTC]

Thank you . I appreciate the support. I have help and great friends and best of all, my writing .Β 

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psycocat In reply to kiwi-damnation [2016-01-21 10:45:09 +0000 UTC]

I often feel the same way about my writing (and have even wrote about that more than once, LOL).

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kiwi-damnation In reply to psycocat [2016-01-21 14:26:56 +0000 UTC]

then you are a true artist.

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psycocat In reply to kiwi-damnation [2016-01-21 15:56:48 +0000 UTC]

I don't know about that ... but I often find myself writing to myself things to help cheer me up or give me strength. Β 

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kiwi-damnation In reply to psycocat [2016-01-22 03:07:17 +0000 UTC]

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Pyrefang [2016-01-20 13:04:11 +0000 UTC]

This looks absolutely marvelous! I hadn't known about the sardine platform before this.Β 

The diction is entirely sound and full, giving you a rounded sense of what is taking place (both externally and internally).Β 

Honestly, this piece just gives an otherworldly omniscient aura to it.Β 

I am most certainly going to keep an eye out for inspiration.

* Pyrefang approves of your work with a standing ovation.

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kiwi-damnation In reply to Pyrefang [2016-01-20 15:34:12 +0000 UTC]

Thank you so much for this feedback . I'm happy that you could experience this piece along with me, and be a part of it also.

Thank you.

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copper9lives [2016-01-20 04:09:25 +0000 UTC]

Baby, this is so POWERFUL a work, and you so richly deserve the DD β€” GO, SAMMY, GO! I'm so proud of you…

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kiwi-damnation In reply to copper9lives [2016-01-20 05:04:00 +0000 UTC]

Awwww thanks Cat

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copper9lives In reply to kiwi-damnation [2016-01-20 06:27:53 +0000 UTC]

You're BRILLIANT, mate. Never forget it. I'm proud to be a friend.

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kiwi-damnation In reply to copper9lives [2016-01-20 07:18:41 +0000 UTC]

So are you honey

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copper9lives In reply to kiwi-damnation [2016-01-20 12:41:05 +0000 UTC]

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segura2112 [2016-01-19 23:08:40 +0000 UTC]

Wow, just EFING WOW!! Thank You and congrats on the DD.

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kiwi-damnation In reply to segura2112 [2016-01-20 00:27:11 +0000 UTC]

Thank you so much, I'm glad this piece resonated with you .Β 

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MadPrinceFeanor [2016-01-19 03:01:11 +0000 UTC]

Congratulations on the DD! Β  You deserve it.

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kiwi-damnation In reply to MadPrinceFeanor [2016-01-19 03:29:50 +0000 UTC]

Awww thanks so much , I appreciate your thoughts.

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Moltenkitty [2016-01-18 23:27:47 +0000 UTC]

Beautiful wow.. Congratulations on your DD

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kiwi-damnation In reply to Moltenkitty [2016-01-19 00:05:06 +0000 UTC]

Thank you so very much Β 

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Moltenkitty In reply to kiwi-damnation [2016-01-20 05:33:00 +0000 UTC]

You're welcome

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autumnicity [2016-01-18 22:09:53 +0000 UTC]

Yes, yes, this is brilliant! Sardine was an incredibly difficult form, and I think you took full advantage of it. The last four lines were especially poignant to me, and I think they captured the essence of PTSD quite well.

Congratulations on the DD, I'm so happy for you!

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kiwi-damnation In reply to autumnicity [2016-01-18 22:31:52 +0000 UTC]

THANK YOU! Thank you for this comment, I really appreciate your feedback .Β 

I'm floored by all of this.

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autumnicity In reply to kiwi-damnation [2016-01-18 22:36:50 +0000 UTC]

You're very welcome! Of course, I love all your work, but I'm really happy that I got the chance to read this one today

I bet, I'm so glad you can get a little more exposure and more people can read this piece! I was just browsing through today's DD's and thought "hey! I recognize that deviant!"

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kiwi-damnation In reply to autumnicity [2016-01-18 22:45:49 +0000 UTC]

Hehehe Awwww . You are so nice .

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autumnicity In reply to kiwi-damnation [2016-01-19 19:24:20 +0000 UTC]

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RJBG [2016-01-18 19:55:36 +0000 UTC]

Great work!

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kiwi-damnation In reply to RJBG [2016-01-18 21:21:28 +0000 UTC]

Thank you so much

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RJBG In reply to kiwi-damnation [2016-01-18 23:22:01 +0000 UTC]

Your welcome! ( :

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Lintu47 [2016-01-18 19:32:35 +0000 UTC]

Congrats on the DD!
Have a nice day!

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kiwi-damnation In reply to Lintu47 [2016-01-18 21:21:40 +0000 UTC]

Awww thank you! Β 

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Lintu47 In reply to kiwi-damnation [2016-01-22 14:57:44 +0000 UTC]

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LostGryphin [2016-01-18 16:45:13 +0000 UTC]

Congrats on the DD

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kiwi-damnation In reply to LostGryphin [2016-01-18 21:21:51 +0000 UTC]

Thank you!

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