Comments: 5
yellowplasma [2013-05-18 02:54:50 +0000 UTC]
Poor Darneth is going to have an itchy, swollen face! Interesting how you factored the tossing and turning of old ships at high sea (as opposed to coastal sailing). I like that the party is a team of youngsters (like in the original movie "Red Dawn"), because it makes their adventures a truly formative experience for them. Agnes is clearly "the good, studious" girl, Darneth is the "wise-guy" and Aron is the "coming of age hero." Emil is almost a human "Chewbacca" and Agnes is his female "Han Solo." Now that the party has landed, let's hope the twins don't justify Aron's suspicions. Let's hope Darneth's efforts to woo the girls (for himself AND Aron) doesn't get them all into trouble.
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TFB71 [2013-05-03 05:59:52 +0000 UTC]
Very nice beginning. Just one criticism: The first officer wouldn't be the one rowing them ashore. That would fall to either the coxwain or one of the midshipmen. Assuming this to be something other than a free trader.
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KheldarLars In reply to TFB71 [2013-05-09 05:59:07 +0000 UTC]
I did mention the ship concept is a new one for Verintos at this time?
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TFB71 In reply to KheldarLars [2013-05-09 15:16:01 +0000 UTC]
Ah. So Verintos hasn't had much of a navy before? Would make more sense that way.
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KheldarLars In reply to TFB71 [2013-05-17 17:57:32 +0000 UTC]
Yeah, their "navy" was all one to six-man fishing vessels that never left sight of shore. This ship is the first of three actually sea-worthy vessels
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