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kenzie — Bitterness
Published: 2002-04-02 05:37:51 +0000 UTC; Views: 253; Favourites: 1; Downloads: 55
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Description
He says goodbye to the romanceYou were feeding in your dreams
He cuts the leash and it runs from you
Disappears from sight
You turn to him tearstained
Pink and breathless and bruised
And he smiles nonchalantly and says, "You're not what I want forever"
And you nod shakily
Hoping he wont notice the synthetic quality of your mechanical laugh
And sewn on smile
You turn to walk away
But he grabs your hand
Flips you around in what seems like a dizzying dance
For one final impersonal kiss
His lips are crinkled and tight like balled up paper
You pull away, and smile at the irony
And catch a glimpse of his hollow eyes
What once looked like some gorgeous storm ripped sky
Now vaguely resembles the space between two crayons still in the box
You walk away
And find comfort in the hollow beat of your boots against the cement
Into faded fabric and silicon tears
Betrayal that smells the way old blood does
And the sunny afternoon is bleaker than the fields of murdered rainforests
On a search for the romance he let run away from you
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Comments: 6
I love the last line, such a good closing. Oooh, and the space between two crayons, you always have such creative and effective images! I love it!
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i like this alot.
real sense of your feelings, but also good control, i liked the images they seemd quite carefully chosen.
i particulary loved the 'sewn on smile' gave me images of lips sewn shut, which worked well wityh the balled up paper
nice aliteration too.
talented bitch
x x x
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your talent for putting you emotions to words is amazing...and you proved that here....great work
-tank
-=don't fear to imagine=-
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Wow...great imagery. I see that you are amazing with words...
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First reaction: "Fcking awesome!"
But I don't like to just post comments like that. Fantastic poem, and for once I can understand it immediately.
I like that.
"And the sunny afternoon is bleaker than the fields of murdered rainforests"
Gah!! I gotta dig that. Once again, wonderfully-written tale of rage. I figured something might have come out of it when you told me about it this morning. Love,
- Ed
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Oooh...this is painful and melancholy. I can see how something like that would cause you to feel so hurt. I'm sorry he said that to you. It was completely insensitive and he's lucky that you love him so much. This conveys your emotions very well. Keep writing, dear!
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