HOME | DD

Description
Blam sat back in his seat comfortably.  Some of Earth’s music was playing over Tnt’s speakers.  “Heh I love this part… ‘I’m sick I’m twisted I’m broken, you can’t fix it.  Red button and we’ll all go-‘Huh?” The Voot beeped that it’d reached its destination.  Blam sat up and looked out of the large window and before him he could not believe his eyes.  He was told not to return to Irk.  Yet the Tallest had sent him there.  He couldn’t fathom being forced to destroy his home.  So many Irken’s were still on it.  Emperor Zix must have lost his mind.
“We can’t do it Tnt… But if we don’t do it we’ll be deserters…”  He said softly as Tnt beeped a soft sad tone.  “Maybe Lord Zix will have an explanation?” Blam rushed to his holopad and punched in the code to speak with the palace.  A female Irken’s head appeared and acted as if he was bothering her. “Irken Palace what do you need?”  She asked rather rudely.  “I need to speak to Emperor Zix it’s of the utmost importance.”  Blam said with urgency.  “Do you have an appointment?”  The woman asked. “Holy Hand Grenades… No I don’t have an appointment, patch me through NOW!” Blam yelled angrily at the hologram.  “Your tone is not appreciated Drone.  Request denied.” With that the hologram vanished. Blam’s PAK forced Nitro into his brain to keep him calm.
Tnt whizzed around the ship gathering items for some idea it had concocted. “What’re you doing Tnt? We’ve gotta get out of here… Even if Lord Zix gave the direct order I couldn’t do it… And we can’t get into see him unless…” A sly grin spread across his lips. “Tnt… No one can resist free Snacks…” He said rather matter-of-factly.  The small droid blinked and beeped its approval of the statement.  “Load it all up onto one of those gravity carts.  I’ll deliver it to Emperor Zix myself. “
The Voot entered Irk’s atmosphere and slowly approached the docking bay nearest the palace.  ~Status Pilot?  Why are you entering a patrolled zone where civilian spacecraft are prohibited?~ A voice came over the computer.  Blam cleared his throat. “I’m a rep from planet Foodcortia I’ve come with a banquet for Lord Zix.”  ~Banquet?  I’ve received no informat…~ Blam could hear other Irken’s speaking now in hushed whispers. ~Access cleared.  Lord Zix’s birthday banquet is right here on my list.  Welcome to the Irk Palace.~  Blam sighed in relief as the Voot loudly locked itself in place.  “Stay hidden Tnt.  Under the hat, quickly.” Blam lifted his hat and the small droid floated in and landed on his head.  Holding his antennae for support.
He slowly began wheeling the cart into the palace.  Smiling as innocently at the guards as he could.  Dressed like a chef he was pretty out of place.  However his quick thinking along with the help of his little friend aided him greatly in his mission.  He reached the elevator and a guard approached him. “Halt cook.” Blam instantly froze. “Uhm… Yes sir what can I do for you?” He asked nervously.  “You don’t… Oh my… is that devil’s food cake?” The guard pointed to a slice of dark brown cake with a strawberry on top. “Uhm… why yes it is.  You may have it, if Lord Zix asks why his cake is short for his birthday party I’ll say it must have been an accident at the bakery… You know how those Vortians are eh?” He nudged the guard whom smiled happily. “Wow thanks Master Chef.” He pushed the button on the elevator for Blam and together they entered.
The elevator rose for quite a while stopping one floor below Emperor Zix’s office.  “This is where I get off… I can’t be seen with chocolate on my face.” The guard grinned and patted Blam’s shoulder.  “Good luck in there.  The Emperor can be a tough cookie… Cookies sound…” Blam raised a large chocolate chip cookie in front of the guard’s face and tossed it down the hallway like a Frisbee.  The guard chased after it like a hungry animal.  The doors closed and within seconds Blam stood mere feet from the woman whom was so rude to him over the holographic projector and behind her, his Lord Emperor Zix.
The woman at the desk was busy doing something with her antennae when Blam approached.  “Uhm… Gifts for Lord Zix. “ He said quietly and the woman looked over the cart.  “Go on in.  He might be busy so if he is you need to leave immediately.  Don’t even look at him. Better yet stop living while you’re in there.” The woman looked him over again and tilted one of her eyebrow. “You look fermillior…” She said still trying to place him. “I’m just your average Irken trying to make his way in the universe.” Blam said as he entered the large double doors of the emperor’s office.  As the doors began to close the woman’s eyes opened wide and she pointed at him. “You’re the rude Irken from the hologram!” Blam waved cockily and made a rude gesture with his hands as the doors closed.  He lifted his hat and Tnt floated to the door.  Searing the opening and blocking all entrance and exit.
“Time to move…” Blam said as he rushed toward the large desk.  “My Lord Emperor Zix I come in your presence out of fear for your life and that of the planet. The Tallest…”
Emperor Zix’s chair turned slowly and the Tallest sat in its large comfy seat. “The Tallest…What?” Tallest Red asked rather grimly. Purple sat with a bag of cookies in his lap and a SUCK in his hand.  Slurping its contents Blam glared at the Tallest.
“You’re setting up Irk’s destruction… Why? Where is Lord Zix?” Blam demanded.  Red merely shrugged. “We sent him on an urgent errand to a planet which no longer exists… In the Milky-Way Galaxy… Mars.”
Blam growled and Tnt beeped loudly at the Tallest. “You want control of the empire…” Blam said with a certainty that sent shivers down his spine. “So? It’s our time.  That old windbag has been Emperor long enough.  It’s like… Been his while life.”  Purple said as he took another hard gulp of his drink.
“He’s the Emperor you idiots!” Blam yelled as the guards outside the sealed door began beating on it violently.  “I’ll stop you… Lord Zix will know what to do…”  Blam grabbed a pizza box and rushed toward the door. “Tnt hat!” The droid floated into the hat and held on.  The door burst open and before him stood the guard with the large cookie still in his mouth. “Special Delivery!” Blam yelled as he threw the Pizza box at the guard and his coworkers.  The lid opened slightly and exploded as the grenade went off.  Blowing a large hole in the side of the building.  Tnt Beeped rapidly and the Voot appeared at the hole.  Blam leapt into it and the cockpit closed.  He took a final glance at the Tallest whom were now standing rather angrily at the hole.  The secretary looked both shocked and amazed by their presence.
“Tnt hack into the mainframe and make our ship a ghost of the armada.  Then set course for Mars. We’ve gotta catch Lord Zix before the Tallest do.”  Blam ordered and Tnt did as instructed.  Within seconds they blasted into hyper-overdrive.  Vanishing into the darkness of space.
Purple dropped his drink and watched as Blam’s Voot vanished.  “This will ruin everything, what about all that planning… Ohhh Snacks.” He rushed over to the cart and began eating.  “Careful Purple. You saw the box that food could be-“ a soft boom and loud splat sounded from the cart as the rest of the Devil’s food cake exploded all over the Tallest. “Rigged…” Red said with finality as Purple happily ate. “It has a kick to it.” He said with a mouth full.  “Oh shut up Purple…” Red said as he rubbed his eyes in annoyance.

Description
Blam sat back in his seat comfortably.  Some of Earth’s music was playing over Tnt’s speakers.  “Heh I love this part… ‘I’m sick I’m twisted I’m broken, you can’t fix it.  Red button and we’ll all go-‘Huh?” The Voot beeped that it’d reached its destination.  Blam sat up and looked out of the large window and before him he could not believe his eyes.  He was told not to return to Irk.  Yet the Tallest had sent him there.  He couldn’t fathom being forced to destroy his home.  So many Irken’s were still on it.  Emperor Zix must have lost his mind.
“We can’t do it Tnt… But if we don’t do it we’ll be deserters…”  He said softly as Tnt beeped a soft sad tone.  “Maybe Lord Zix will have an explanation?” Blam rushed to his holopad and punched in the code to speak with the palace.  A female Irken’s head appeared and acted as if he was bothering her. “Irken Palace what do you need?”  She asked rather rudely.  “I need to speak to Emperor Zix it’s of the utmost importance.”  Blam said with urgency.  “Do you have an appointment?”  The woman asked. “Holy Hand Grenades… No I don’t have an appointment, patch me through NOW!” Blam yelled angrily at the hologram.  “Your tone is not appreciated Drone.  Request denied.” With that the hologram vanished. Blam’s PAK forced Nitro into his brain to keep him calm.
Tnt whizzed around the ship gathering items for some idea it had concocted. “What’re you doing Tnt? We’ve gotta get out of here… Even if Lord Zix gave the direct order I couldn’t do it… And we can’t get into see him unless…” A sly grin spread across his lips. “Tnt… No one can resist free Snacks…” He said rather matter-of-factly.  The small droid blinked and beeped its approval of the statement.  “Load it all up onto one of those gravity carts.  I’ll deliver it to Emperor Zix myself. “
The Voot entered Irk’s atmosphere and slowly approached the docking bay nearest the palace.  ~Status Pilot?  Why are you entering a patrolled zone where civilian spacecraft are prohibited?~ A voice came over the computer.  Blam cleared his throat. “I’m a rep from planet Foodcortia I’ve come with a banquet for Lord Zix.”  ~Banquet?  I’ve received no informat…~ Blam could hear other Irken’s speaking now in hushed whispers. ~Access cleared.  Lord Zix’s birthday banquet is right here on my list.  Welcome to the Irk Palace.~  Blam sighed in relief as the Voot loudly locked itself in place.  “Stay hidden Tnt.  Under the hat, quickly.” Blam lifted his hat and the small droid floated in and landed on his head.  Holding his antennae for support.
He slowly began wheeling the cart into the palace.  Smiling as innocently at the guards as he could.  Dressed like a chef he was pretty out of place.  However his quick thinking along with the help of his little friend aided him greatly in his mission.  He reached the elevator and a guard approached him. “Halt cook.” Blam instantly froze. “Uhm… Yes sir what can I do for you?” He asked nervously.  “You don’t… Oh my… is that devil’s food cake?” The guard pointed to a slice of dark brown cake with a strawberry on top. “Uhm… why yes it is.  You may have it, if Lord Zix asks why his cake is short for his birthday party I’ll say it must have been an accident at the bakery… You know how those Vortians are eh?” He nudged the guard whom smiled happily. “Wow thanks Master Chef.” He pushed the button on the elevator for Blam and together they entered.
The elevator rose for quite a while stopping one floor below Emperor Zix’s office.  “This is where I get off… I can’t be seen with chocolate on my face.” The guard grinned and patted Blam’s shoulder.  “Good luck in there.  The Emperor can be a tough cookie… Cookies sound…” Blam raised a large chocolate chip cookie in front of the guard’s face and tossed it down the hallway like a Frisbee.  The guard chased after it like a hungry animal.  The doors closed and within seconds Blam stood mere feet from the woman whom was so rude to him over the holographic projector and behind her, his Lord Emperor Zix.
The woman at the desk was busy doing something with her antennae when Blam approached.  “Uhm… Gifts for Lord Zix. “ He said quietly and the woman looked over the cart.  “Go on in.  He might be busy so if he is you need to leave immediately.  Don’t even look at him. Better yet stop living while you’re in there.” The woman looked him over again and tilted one of her eyebrow. “You look fermillior…” She said still trying to place him. “I’m just your average Irken trying to make his way in the universe.” Blam said as he entered the large double doors of the emperor’s office.  As the doors began to close the woman’s eyes opened wide and she pointed at him. “You’re the rude Irken from the hologram!” Blam waved cockily and made a rude gesture with his hands as the doors closed.  He lifted his hat and Tnt floated to the door.  Searing the opening and blocking all entrance and exit.
“Time to move…” Blam said as he rushed toward the large desk.  “My Lord Emperor Zix I come in your presence out of fear for your life and that of the planet. The Tallest…”
Emperor Zix’s chair turned slowly and the Tallest sat in its large comfy seat. “The Tallest…What?” Tallest Red asked rather grimly. Purple sat with a bag of cookies in his lap and a SUCK in his hand.  Slurping its contents Blam glared at the Tallest.
“You’re setting up Irk’s destruction… Why? Where is Lord Zix?” Blam demanded.  Red merely shrugged. “We sent him on an urgent errand to a planet which no longer exists… In the Milky-Way Galaxy… Mars.”
Blam growled and Tnt beeped loudly at the Tallest. “You want control of the empire…” Blam said with a certainty that sent shivers down his spine. “So? It’s our time.  That old windbag has been Emperor long enough.  It’s like… Been his while life.”  Purple said as he took another hard gulp of his drink.
“He’s the Emperor you idiots!” Blam yelled as the guards outside the sealed door began beating on it violently.  “I’ll stop you… Lord Zix will know what to do…”  Blam grabbed a pizza box and rushed toward the door. “Tnt hat!” The droid floated into the hat and held on.  The door burst open and before him stood the guard with the large cookie still in his mouth. “Special Delivery!” Blam yelled as he threw the Pizza box at the guard and his coworkers.  The lid opened slightly and exploded as the grenade went off.  Blowing a large hole in the side of the building.  Tnt Beeped rapidly and the Voot appeared at the hole.  Blam leapt into it and the cockpit closed.  He took a final glance at the Tallest whom were now standing rather angrily at the hole.  The secretary looked both shocked and amazed by their presence.
“Tnt hack into the mainframe and make our ship a ghost of the armada.  Then set course for Mars. We’ve gotta catch Lord Zix before the Tallest do.”  Blam ordered and Tnt did as instructed.  Within seconds they blasted into hyper-overdrive.  Vanishing into the darkness of space.
Purple dropped his drink and watched as Blam’s Voot vanished.  “This will ruin everything, what about all that planning… Ohhh Snacks.” He rushed over to the cart and began eating.  “Careful Purple. You saw the box that food could be-“ a soft boom and loud splat sounded from the cart as the rest of the Devil’s food cake exploded all over the Tallest. “Rigged…” Red said with finality as Purple happily ate. “It has a kick to it.” He said with a mouth full.  “Oh shut up Purple…” Red said as he rubbed his eyes in annoyance.