Comments: 28
Caffeinated-Bunny [2014-07-18 01:53:34 +0000 UTC]
This sounds a bit like twilight. Particularly in some of the lines used.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Caffeinated-Bunny In reply to Ikuzram021 [2014-07-18 02:29:52 +0000 UTC]
I just think you could do a lot better in this chapter. That's all. I'd be willing to work with you on this and improve it.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Ikuzram021 In reply to Caffeinated-Bunny [2014-07-18 02:33:32 +0000 UTC]
I would be very happy for you to help me
Can ya note me?
👍: 0 ⏩: 2
Caffeinated-Bunny In reply to Ikuzram021 [2014-07-18 02:42:46 +0000 UTC]
In the meantime, come check out some of my work. It may help you get ideas to improve your own writing. When I'm unavailable to critique. DorianHarper and Agawaer are two skilled writers I turn to when I need tips and advice.
The first is the author of In Death, the other is currently working on Rougarou.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
NadinesADeviant [2014-07-10 07:51:23 +0000 UTC]
what a wonderful chapter i loved it!!!!
Im glad the both opened up its about time!!!! ^w^
new characters are always awesome i hope it wouldnt ruin friendships ; 0 ;
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Ikuzram021 In reply to NadinesADeviant [2014-07-10 14:43:36 +0000 UTC]
Thanks so much! I have to put on hold for awhile because of Sumer reading though -_- but lol at least one of my summer reading books is Dracula XD that's so funny when I found out hahah!
I know it was about time ;3
Me either, lol.... Hmm although it would be more exciting, but you'll find out though
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
NadinesADeviant In reply to Ikuzram021 [2014-07-10 20:57:37 +0000 UTC]
oh nuuus thats sadness ; 0 ;
but understandable!!
heck yeah it was!!!!
i guess i will wait to see then XP
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Ikuzram021 In reply to XxLina-ChanxX [2014-07-08 19:46:26 +0000 UTC]
Thanks!
I'm really glad to hear that :3
OMG that would be awesome lol XD haha! Isabella's health would be like 99999999 XD that would be a long boss battle lol
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
XxLina-ChanxX In reply to Ikuzram021 [2014-07-09 00:58:37 +0000 UTC]
Lol I wonder what kind of attacks she would use XD
obviously other than slash XD
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Ikuzram021 In reply to XxLina-ChanxX [2014-07-09 01:05:12 +0000 UTC]
HOLY WATER!!!! Lol no that would kill her XD
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
XxLina-ChanxX In reply to Ikuzram021 [2014-07-10 14:16:35 +0000 UTC]
I guess sam wouldn't want to kill her either XD lol
hmm... These are interesting thoughts XD
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
FlyTheFish [2014-07-07 17:53:13 +0000 UTC]
When you write and later edit, try to put each person speaking on a different line. It helps with keeping track of who is talking and helps everything not get run together.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Ikuzram021 In reply to FlyTheFish [2014-07-07 17:58:21 +0000 UTC]
Thanks for the tip I'll keep that in mind
👍: 0 ⏩: 1