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DarkestLinkEAI — Spork: Stepdaddy Issues
Published: 2012-12-28 03:20:54 +0000 UTC; Views: 1839; Favourites: 9; Downloads: 1
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Creep: For today's session, Ash writes a "bonding" fic about Lawrence and Phineas. Hilarity ensues, of course...and boring following after.Erik: I'm scared. Ash's fics are so boring....
Creep: And after the last fic, I'm frightened as well. Thankfully, this one isn't as long as the other one. Ready to dive, bro?
Erik: Will something interesting happen this time Uncle CreepE?
Creep: One can only hope. Let's go~
It had been an exhausting and emotional week for Phineas. The Monday announcement of the school's yearly Father's Day Activities had made him just as excited as the years before; he and Ferb would both take turns entering one obstacle race and competition after another with their father.
Creep: Awwww! See? Lawrence is their fuckin' dad! I don't care if he's really a stepdad; he's still a frikkin' dad and not just to Ferb. To Phineas as well...
It had been something Principal Beauregard came up with for the entire high school.
Creep: Oh god, not Mitch again! DX
Erik: *pulls out shotgun and points it at his head* I swear to God, if Francis is even mention...
And every year, the games were more and more interesting.
As usual, Phineas was looking forward to that coming weekend.
Creep: See? Loving Lawrence....why can't most fics be about that?
… At least until the new kid from the eleventh grade spoke up.
"Those Father's Day games are for dads and their kids; not dads and their stepkids."
Erik: OH MY FUCKING GOD, ASH! Why must you do this every time? Why do you need to make a simple, friendly, funny show so dramatic?!
Creep: That is the most dickish thing to say, man. =\ Not the kid, but Ash; I mean, this is sort of offensive, considering I had a stepdad at one point.
At first, Phineas had shrugged it off, as usual. He had known Lawrence for so long now, he had never considered him as his stepfather, but merely as his father. And Ferb had acted the same way with Linda being his mother.
Erik: But everything changed when the Kicster Nation attacked.
But the more that teenager had insisted it, and in a very rude manner, the more it began to bother Phineas, as well as Ferb.
Creep: Is this teenager apparently Ash incarnate? Or Antonio?
Erik: It's Ash's insert, because no character in the show is like that.
Phineas had attempted to say something back after a few days of the same boy saying things to him, but to his complete surprise and astonishment, Ferb had the last say; and it was not something Phineas had expected him to say:
"You didn't know him for as long as I did… so technically, you don't know him as well as I do."
Creep: It's funny, considering I know him...and I don't care.
Erik: ...Are they talking about the kid?
Creep: I think Ferb was talking about Francis.
Erik: ...Ferb knew Francis longer than Phineas? What? So...I was sure if it was the kid or Lawrence, but you think it's Francis? Actually, that makes no sense period. What would Ferb know about anyone more than Phineas? They met at 4! What would a 4 year old glen from those years of knowledge.
Creep: No, Ferb is clearly talking to the k--actually, how does the kid know about Francis or Lawrence or even the fact that P&F have a stepdad?
Erik: Has Lawerence ever been called a stepfather before? Even once? Even addressed like that.
Phineas had not expected his own brother to say that. Part of him figured it was because Ferb had been faced with pressure from that student, but the other half of him said that he was right.
Creep: Hell, Phineas didn't even know much about his dad outside of his gay best friend and his emo sister.
So for the remainder of the week, Phineas had begun to feel more and more out of place in the blended family he had grown to love so.
Creep: Because of some random asshole.
Erik: Don't you mean...ASHhole! *rimshot*
Creep: ….*sigh* Hehehe. XD
And he ceased communications with Ferb. Awkwardly. He even asked his mother if he could sleep in the guest room until things cooled over.
Creep: Because of some random asshole, he's acting distant to two people he's literally grown up with.
Erik: ...Thank you Ash. P&F needed that. =/
But the closer the weekend came, the worse Phineas felt. Suddenly, his heart seemed only half completed, as if one part of it had been torn out.
Creep: It really makes no sense whatso-goddamn-ever. >.<
A whole that could never be filled properly was where there used to be none, filling his head with doubts; he felt as though he was missing something every other child he knew had: two parents.
… Two biological parents.
Creep: Every child, huh? Hey, Erik, do you have a biological dad 'cause I don't.
Erik: Sure I do. Most people do. Mine is a pedophilic stoner I haven't seen in 5 years...oh wait, I forgot to mention..most people don't LIVE with their biological parents.
Creep: Mine's a cheating asshole. Again, you're really insensitive about stepfamilies, Ash.
Erik: It's common knowledge that most kids don't live with their biological parents...and yet Ash couldn't be arsed to do this base amount of research.
Was it his fault? Was he to blame that his biological father was no longer there? Was it of his doing that the man he had once been fond of could not make it to the festivities?
Creep: He died in a car accident when you didn't even remember the man.
Was it his fault that that drunk driver had collided head-on with the small car his father was driving?
Creep: This is what happens when you use fanfiction and OCs as an outlet for family issues.
Erik: Ash, this is fanfiction...fiction based on a show...not fiction based on your own bloody personal problems. =/
… Phineas began to feel as though it was.
Sunday came, and the activities took place as usual. Phineas and Ferb both accompanied Lawrence to the park, like every year, signed up and got ready for the first competition: the three-legged race.
Creep: Don't we already have an episode about this? "I Was a Middle Age Robot"?
Erik: Ash isn't very creative, CreepE.
Creep: True dat.
Usually, Lawrence would dare to attempt tying both of his ankles to both Phineas and Ferb's, although this usually ended in a hilarious loss either at the beginning or the end of the course.
Creep: Not like Phineas would care; he'd think Francis would have won the race.
Erik: Francis would have won the race, cured diabetes, and ended world hunger all in the same day. Later than night, he would walk across the ocean like Jesus and cure the sick in Haiti.
But Phineas insisted that he did it with Ferb. So when the horn was blown, the two Fletchers began clumsily making their way across the field together.
… And Phineas left the park and headed home.
Creep: *sigh* I hate you, Ash. Not only an ass towards Lawrence, but an ass to stepfamilies; I'm amazed people aren't raged about how stupid this fic sounds.
Erik: This is what they want P&F to be. A shit ton of drama and hate towards stepfamilies. Remember, these are the rich kids who can afford to blow money on premium and call themselves poor.
He felt horrible. He felt like the odd one out, which had never been something he thought he would regret.
Creep: Well, he is triangle-shaped.
Phineas had always been different than other children, whether it was because of the shape of his head or because of the things he did or even his name.
Creep: Again, not the first time "Phineas" was used for a name...and even then, it's not THAT surreal of a name.
But he had been proud of his uniqueness and everything that came with it.
Creep: Except for the fact that we actually still uniqueness and this fic almost feels like Ash's wish of having a stepdad.
Erik: Until Ash decided to squash that uniqueness out of him...seriously, she's worse than the guy at the Smile Away school.
Today, however, he felt like this was something he had overlooked.
Creep: Again, some RANDOM ASS kid makes him act totally distant to Lawrence and Ferb, both of which he grew up with as a little kid. Get over it!
Erik: No. Ash, the God of this forsaken universe, makes him act distant to Lawrence and Ferb. Exactly how she feels the show should be.
The walk home was filled with regrets and sorrows. He wondered if life was toying with him that day; he had never seen so many children outside with their fathers, playing catch or squirting each other with water.
Creep: Ughhh....
Distant memories of his father doing things with him and Candace, like light fireworks or count clouds filled his mind...
Creep: This is just offensive.
Erik: How the fuck does he remember his Dad? Why does his Dad have to be fucking Jesus? Let's do something more realistic...how about his Dad's an ass? I mean if you're going to do an adult P&F, you may as well do it right.
Creep: I mean, why not like Isaac or something?
It became even more unbearable when he heard an ambulance whine down the street... THAT was something he did not need to hear on that particular day.
Creep; Oh dear god! DX
Erik: When does something finally happen?
It took him at least fifteen to twenty minutes to arrive home. But instead of letting his mother know that he had returned, he simply entered the garage and stared at the drumset he and Ferb had pulled out for band practice. These drums had once belonged to his father, Francis Flynn.
Creep: Of fuckin' course. Everything Phineas has is basically hand-me-down. Hell, is the junk in his room all from Francis? The sea raft bed? The tiki head? The telephone booth?
Erik: His underwear too.
Creep: Yep. XD
According to Linda, he had been an avid drum player, even though he did not look like he was.
Creep: Yeah, he's a lot of things that he doesn't look like.
He could read music incredibly well, as well as sing. He could also play bass guitar, but he did not enjoy that as much as he enjoyed playing drums.
Creep: Yes, continuing making Francis into a God and Phineas into a Gary-Sue clone.
Francis: I died...for your sins.
Phineas could vaguely remember how his father would sit him on his lap and let him hit a drum with one of his sticks. Phineas could play the drums quite well, but unlike his father, he found more pleasure in playing the guitar.
Creep: Slightly tweaking some differences between the two isn't gonna help, Ash. The damage is done!
Erik: Bullfuckingshit. Kids can't remember crap from when they were two years old. =/
The fifteen-year-old walked up to the drumset and trailed his fingers over the rim of a snare drum. Walking around the kit, he took a seat at the small bench and reached down to grab the sticks that were sitting near the bass drum. He held them up to his eyes and stared at them for several seconds, even after his eyes had welled up. Tears fell to the ground when he blinked.
Creep: You were a baby; you didn't care when he died. Why are you giving a fuck now?! >(
Ash: Because Phineas is emo in the show, stupid.
After a moment of sitting there doing nothing but staring at the sticks that had once belonged to his father, Phineas closed his eyes, bit his lip and began pounding away at the drums as though he could hear the melody in his mind.
Creep: BULLSHIT.
He did not notice Linda peer into the garage and silently watch him play as tears filled her own eyes.
Creep: This is BULLSHIT.
After several minutes of playing, Phineas fell to the floor in a sitting position and remained there for nearly half an hour. He balanced the sticks in his hands until Linda came to talk to him. Phineas knew that his mother had guessed why he was back, but he was thankful she did not mention wanting to talk about it.
Creep: Wouldn't dare talk about it to Lawrence, the fake dad guy. *sarcasm*
Before she returned into the house, Phineas asked her if he could spend the night at his sister's place.
"Spend the night at Candace's house? Is… is there a reason why?"
"I dunno… I just wanna sleep there… I need some… time away from…"
Erik: Wait, what happened to Candace?
Creep: Moved out, I guess? I mean, if Phin's like 15, Candace's probably moved out with Jeremy.
Erik: She's only 21...and Phineas is 15?
Creep: I guess.
Erik: Thanks for establishing that, Ash....and why?
He never finished, but he knew Linda already guessed who he wanted to stay away from for a while. So just as Lawrence and Ferb returned from the park with the few ribbons they had acquired, Candace came and picked her little brother up.
"Where's Phineas going?"
"He's been feeling a little off for the past week. So he's going to spend the night at Candace's. He might stay there for a few nights if needed."
"I was wondering where he had run off to… Why did he leave the park?"
Creep: Because for some fuckin' reason, the thought of his dead dad that he didn't know plagued his mind to the point where he can't bare to look at the faces of Lawrence and Ferb, despite loving them and grown up with both of them as a young child.
Erik: Apparently though, he has a deeper relationship with this man he shouldn't logically be able to remember.
Phineas ate very little for dinner at his sister's, but he was grateful for the fact that she came and sat with him in the living room later with giant pieces of chocolate cake—Candace had gotten into the habit of cooking once she moved out of her parents' house, and knew that her little brother enjoyed everything she came up with, even the stuff that came out rock hard or burnt.
Phineas: I secretly use them for fuel for some of my inventions, but don't tell my sister that.
"Mom said you had a bit of a rough week."
"That's one way of putting it."
"Why didn't you stay with Dad at the Father's Day Activities in the park?"
"… It didn't feel right."
"What are you talking about?"
"… A kid from school stated that it was for Dads and their biological kids… not stepkids. It didn't bug me at first until someone told me that I didn't know Dad as well as I should, since he's not my biological father… doing those Father's Day Activities with him suddenly felt… out of place."
"… Who said that to you?"
"…Ferb…"
Erik: ...Are you serious, Ash? You disgust me.
"… Ferb?! He actually said that to you? What the heck crawled up his leg?"
"Don't get mad at him… he was under pressure too…"
Creep: That's what he meant? Now...I'm confused....
Erik: Because Ferb got to know him so well in those toddler years he can't remember.
Phineas poured out the events of that week to her and mentioned how he felt. Candace had learned to be a good listener over the years, and once Phineas had finished speaking, she attempted to cheer him up.
Creep: This writing style is so redundant. =\
Erik: When does something happen?
"I highly doubt that Dad labels you the same way that kid does, Phineas."
They ate chocolate cake together and then Phineas left to play a few video games in the spare bedroom while his sister cleaned up. Considering his father had been absent that week, gone on a trip to India to visit his mother, Baljeet had stayed home during the festivities reading, helping his mother and playing online video games. So when Phineas got online, Baljeet made himself available.
"How has that issue between you and Ferb been resolving?"
"At the moment… I just need a few days away from him."
Creep: Yes, even distancing himself from his BEST FRIEND.
Erik: ...So did I miss the invention and Doof plot?
Creep: Please, you almost barely see Doof at all; he's rarer than Lawrence.
"Ouch. It is hard to believe that you two are arguing."
Erik: ...This doesn't sound like Baljeet.
"We're not really arguing… and it's not really his fault. I just need to forget about the whole stepfather thing."
Creep: You REALLY need to get over it. Lawrence is your Dad; he raised you as a kid. THE END.
Erik: So does Ash.
Ash: Fuck step dads! They are the spawn of Satan!
"Do you remember what your biological father was like, Phin?"
Erik: No.
"… Just a bit…"
Erik: Lies.
Creep: "Just a bit"? Is Phineas like Jimmy Neutron with a photographic memory or something?
"Was he like you?"
Creep: In such a way, that Marie is looks incredibly inbred.
"… Could we change subjects, please?"
Erik: Yeah, let's talk about...idk...an invention!
"Alright. Sorry about that."
They played an online game together, talking about what they had planned for summer.
Creep: Despite us never seeing them.
Erik: Wish we could see it. Also why is all the dialogue in italics?
Creep: How common do you see an invention in any of Ash's stories up to this point?
Erik: Only the plot raping translator.
Despite the fact that Baljeet tended to be a little boring at times, Phineas had always admired his intelligence and was grateful for his help.
Creep: It must be either Phineas' inner monologue or Ash being a dick again, but either way, when did Phin ever consider Baljeet "boring"?
He also noticed the effort Baljeet put into distracting him from his thoughts, which he silently thanked.
After an hour or so, Phineas' cellphone began to sing a bohemian styled song.
Creep: That's new. I was kinda expecting Bowling For Soup.
He put his controller down and picked up his phone, already knowing who it was.
"I need to talk to you. Like now."
"Okay."
"Could you let me in?"
"Where are you?"
"Right here."
There came a knock on his window. When Phineas turned his head, he found his stepbrother leaning against the glass while rapping his knuckles against it. He held his cellphone against his ear. Phineas stared at him silently for a moment before letting Baljeet know that he had to put the game on hold for a while. His friend did not mind, stating that he had been called to get off anyhow. So after saying goodbye, Phineas logged out of the game and opened the window for his best friend to crawl in.
"I said something stupid and I want to apologize."
Erik: Ferb shut up.
"It's no big deal; you were under pressure…"
"No, it is a big deal if I said it to you. You didn't deserve to hear that, especially from me…"
Erik: Every time Ash makes Ferb talk, he's brutally raped.
Creep: Hell, it's not even Ferb's fault to begin with; it's Phineas not shutting up about his dead dad and acting a dick towards his brother and his dad. Instead of talking to them, he basically avoid them like a prick.
They chatted quietly about the events of that week, and only stopped when Ferb had thoroughly expressed his regret and apologized for the way he had been acting with Phineas all week.
Creep: Again, why is Ferb the guilty one here? Phineas thought his stepbrother and stepdad, two people he's known and loved longer than Francis, felt "out of place" and acting like a such a jerk that he avoid them and even went to Candace's house to get away from them. That's not endearing; that's being an asshole!
Erik: Because Ash Ferb made Phineas feel like Lawrence wasn't his Dad.
After forgiving him, Phinease invited him to play a few video games.
Creep: Apology through gaming.
However, Ferb's apology did not completely make Phineas' feelings from that week disappear, but he decided not to let his brother know about it.
Creep: You refer to Ferb as his "brother" yet he constantly tried to avoid him. I'm sorry, I can't get over that.
It took at least a half hour before Candace noticed her stepbrother's presence. Seeing that the issue had been resolved, she called her parents and told her brothers that Lawrence would come to pick them up shortly. After loading Ferb's bike into the trunk of the van, the boys left and headed for home.
However, once in the driveway, Lawrence had other plans than letting his stepson get out; as Ferb unloaded his bike and headed indoors, the man instructed Phineas to hop into the front passenger seat.
Creep: Oh joy.
"I want to take you out for coffee, Phineas."
"I don't drink coffee, Dad."
Creep: See, why does Phineas refer to Lawrence as "Dad"? If he's so fuckin' obsessive with Francis, why is he already calling him Dad still? It's fuckin' inconstant!
"Then we'll go out for hot chocolate or something."
"… But it's eleven o'clock at night. Hardly anything's open at this hour."
"We'll find some place. There's still one hour left for Father's Day and I'd like to spend it with both of my sons, not just one."
Erik: This doesn't sound like Lawrence and Phineas. This could just as easily be Spongebob and Patrick.
Creep: Ash doesn't care.
Phineas said nothing as his stepfather left the driveway and took off down the street with him.
*****
Lawrence grabbed the hot drinks when the woman behind the counter handed them to him. Thanking her with a smile, he turned away and walked towards the table near the window, where Phineas was silently sitting. They had been able to find a café opened for twenty-four hours, and so after instructing his son to go find a seat, Lawrence ordered a drink for each of them.
Creep: Basically a G-rated bar.
Erik: I can tell I'm going to hate this.
Creep: I felt it from the sight of the picture.
Erik: There's a picture?
Creep: Didn't you see it on the other doc?
Erik: I thought that was for a shity Perry fic.
Creep: No, that's Lawrence and Phineas.
Erik: I'll check it tomorrow when we finish this.
Phineas looked up at his stepfather arrived and sat down across from him with a sigh. Lawrence took their drinks off of the tray. "One decaff for me," he announced
Creep: One "F" too many, Ash.
, "And one hot chocolate for you. Enjoy."
Phineas grabbed his drink and held the Styrofoam cup up to his lips. Careful not to burn himself, he took a sip. Even though it was summer, he had not realized how chilly that night had been until he tasted the hot chocolate.
The two of them remained silent for a few seconds. Lawrence watched as Phineas attempted not to have eye contact with him, and finally opened his mouth. "Your mother spoke to me," Lawrence said softly, catching Phineas' attention.
Creep: Finally.
Erik: Finally dialogue not in italics.
"At least briefly. About how you've been feeling this past week. I know you probably didn't tell her everything, but knowing her, her guesses are topnotch… That and you only ask to stay at your sister's when something is bothering you deeply."
Creep: It should have been hinted at the moment he left the house just when you and Ferb arrived.
Phineas looked down at his cup while tracing circles over the lid. Lawrence watched him do so silently before continuing: "Phineas, I raised you since you were three years old," he said.
Erik: A three year old remembered his Dad...?
Creep: Again, must be like Jimmy Neutron or something.
"I watched you start school, I helped you ride a two-wheel bike, I even taught you how to fish.
Creep: Shocking like...*gasp* a fuckin' dad! 0.0
I will admit; raising one stubborn girl and two brilliant boys was not an easy task, but it was always worth wild."
Creep: "Wild"? Don't you mean "while"? Couldn't even spell-check, huh?
He paused a moment before going on. "I know… how important Francis was to you…"
Erik: Shut the fuck up about Francis...=/
Phineas raised his eyes and looked at him.
"… Biological fathers have that kind of effect on their sons. Ferb looks up to me and respects me in a manner no other boy could, and the same goes for you and your biological father. A bond like that is impossible to break… even death can't undo it."
Creep: What bond? He didn't care up until he was a teenager; clearly, Francis wasn't a big deal to him.
Erik: You have a bond with your Dad, CreepE?
Creep: No.
Erik: Weird...neither do I. It's almost like Ash has no clue what she's fucking talking about...
Creep: Or the term, "moving on" means.
Lawrence reached over and placed a hand on Phineas' shoulder. "Your father was an extraordinary man," he said.
Creep: Which Phineas will end up exactly when he's older. Glasses and all...
Erik: You didn't know him.
"You have a right to admire him the way you do, to miss him as much as you do.
Erik: No, you don't. It's unhealthy, unnatural, and just pathetic.
Creep: And stupid.
There's no crime in that, and I would feel horrible if you tried to forget him completely only to satisfy me.
Erik:...You mean...like a normal functioning human being? =0
Especially today. He was your father,
Erik: He did nothing for you.
he introduced you to life,
Erik: He beat your sister.
so there is no crime in missing him, even after all these years. Each father has something unique to give to their children and Francis gave you his world.
Creep: And basically everything that is you. Genetics are weird.
Erik: He gave you that bruise Linda calls a birth mark.
If that isn't considered a special gift, then I don't know what is."
Erik: He died condemning you to hell.
He smiled warmly before going on: "I don't want to replace him in your life, Phineas,"
Lawrence: I'm too good for him.
Creep: ...isn't that....exactly sorta what a stepdad suppose to do? Linda got over the death of her husband, met Lawrence who's a nice guy, and moved on with her life. Phineas dealt with the Fletchers since he was 3 and it was NEVER a issue until now! That's why it doesn't work and it's why this whole "emotional" story is just bullshit.
Erik: I love making Francis out to be an ass. It makes for a more interesting character. XD
he whispered. "I don't want anyone to take the place that you reserved for your father. But I want you to understand that, whatever people say to you about blended families, divorced families or the blood ties between them, you were and always will be, to me, my son. I may not have the same relationship with you that I have with Ferb, or that you had with Francis,
Creep: *facepalm*
Erik: Good thing this moral is consistent throughout the fiction...*eyeroll*
but despite what others say, I raised you, so that makes you as much my son as Ferb does."
Creep: It doesn't even matter! Francis is dead and Lawrence is the dad; move on!
Phineas stared at him silently the entire time the man spoke, and suddenly, all of the doubtful thoughts and sad memories that had built up within him, weighing his heart down like an anchor, disappeared. It was almost as though they had never existed. After an entire week, Phineas gave Lawrence a grateful smile.
Creep: Yep....Lawrence is that good of a talker.
Erik: That didn't sound shit like Lawrence or anything in P&F...
Creep: Sarcasm.
Lawrence rubbed the boy's head. "Ditch the Step part, remember?" he said. "I do recall you saying that to Ferb once or twice. It goes double for me. And don't forget that."
Erik: ...Is this a troll fic or do I vastly overestimate Ash's inteligience?
Creep: No, I think Ash is this ridiculous.
Phineas looked at his hot chocolate for a moment. "I won't," he replied quietly.
Lawrence pulled his hand away from the teenager and held up his coffee to his lips. "If I do say so myself, though, people should be jealous of you," he said after a sip. "Not very many people can say that they have two good fathers. I mean, perhaps there are, but from the people I know, not so much."
Creep: Name them.
Phineas nodded weakly before looking up at the clock nearby. "There's still fifteen minutes left before tomorrow," he announced. "Did you want to tell me how the festivities went today?"
"That can wait," Lawrence replied. "I'd rather tell you what I used to do for my father on father's day."
"… I'd like that."
"And then tomorrow, considering you have no school, we'll go fishing with Ferb. How's that sound?"
"Sensational. Could we go back to the secret fishing hole you found when we were kids?"
Creep: Either there was something we didn't know or he's referring to Lake Nosey...which wasn't a secret.
Erik: ...And the dialogue still sucks...
"I believe we could."
Phineas grinned weakly before looking down at his hot chocolate again. It had been an exhausting and emotional week for him.
Creep: Something he clearly couldn't get over and avoid causing trouble between his loved ones.
Monday started out nicely yet progressively got worse, and the negative streak had held strong all the way to Sunday. But had it not, Phineas would not be sitting there in that café with his father, only the two of them. He would not feel as lucky as he did now to have had two fathers instead of one.
Exhausting week, perhaps. Emotional, definitely. But all worth it in the end.
Creep: Yes, thanks to this fic, Francis has officially booted up to the Top 5 Worst P&F OC ever. =3
Phineas waited for the man to take another sip of his coffee before speaking again: "Happy Father's Day, Dad," he said.
Lawrence smiled back.
Erik: ...That was an abrupt ending.
*SNIP*
Creep: ….as if I had so little respect for Ash already.....this is just...awful.
Erik: I'm in a lag fest, I'll let you make most of the final thoughts.
Creep: Alright. This story is absolutely appalling; as a guy who was in a stepfamily as a child, I'm so fuckin' offensive about this story. Forgot about the fact this is overdramatic and sounds nothing like P&F; no, what really pisses me off is basically the story's moral: "Stepfamilies aren't good as REAL families; they're just a bunch of delusional people who try to replace the good, lovable biological parents with some people they met." And the whole relationship between Francis and Phineas is utter BULLSHIT. I'm sorry if I sound heartless and shit, but I cannot feel anything for Francis at all; he's made out like Jesus Christ, literally having everyone loving the fuck outta him and his son who barely even knew he died as a 3-year-old and suddenly feels bad about his death (in one hell of a delayed reaction) and causing more shit between the Flynns and Fletchers.
Erik: Ash claims he's based off her Dad. I call bullshit. He's based off of Phineas.
Creep: I really wouldn't be surprised if Francis actually is Marie's grandfather. Overall, this is just...heartless. The entire plot (whatever it was) was basically pointless and unneeded.
Erik: I love how she throws in this moral that stepfamilies are just as good as normal ones....even though the rest of the fic(s) contradict that.
Creep: Basically mocking poor Lawrence. You know, she's probably gonna use her talks with Dan & Swampy like a shield against people and say, "I met the creators, so I can write whatever I want!
".Erik: Too late, she already does that. Anyway, anything else?
Creep: ...nah. I'm going to bed, bro.
Erik: Alright then. Goodnight.
Creep: See ya tomorrow! =3
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Comments: 11
Thanks for this, guys. The whole "biological parent" thing is complete BUNK.
My biological father is the fucking scum of the earth. I can only imagine what she'd have to say about someone being raised by *gasp* LESBIAN PARENTS and *EVEN BIGGER GASP* gets good grades and is a fairly good person?!
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I agree with all of what you said
I gotta admit, as much as I want to be Ash's friend again, I also dont like how she makes these stories so emotional. I get what she's trying to play at, but there are way too many self inserts.
I also still think that Francis, Charlene, and Mitch were ripped off from the show. I mean, three names? Thats too much of a coincidence, admit it.
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I'd sock the mofo in the face, leave and then go enjoy fathers day with my dad.
Lol, you know how much I can remember from when I was a 2 year old? Nothing. The only clear memory I have from my early childhood is of my sister's birth when I was 5, and nothing really before that. So honestly, I call bs. You only really remember stuff if it's important when you're a kid. I could get him sort of remembering the day he died, but the fact that he can freakin' remember being on his lap once or twice and playing the drums in ridiculous.
I sort of feel annoyed by this constant idealization of 'two biological parents'. I've seen plenty of happy blended families. My parents are still together but my dad's an asshole 70% of the time.
So you know what, two biological parents aren't as great as they're fucking cracked up to be all the time. If you've got a stepfather who loves you and you at least know that your biological father loved you too, be happy that you've got parents that love you so much and are understanding. Shitloads of people don't have that, so I think it's ridiculous that he's portrayed as such a whiny little bitch when he has such a wonderful (albeit blended, but really, who gives a fuck about that nowadays?)family that he rarely has problems with. It's just like, this fic is useless, they've already overcome these sorts of blended family barriers a long time ago, so they probably wouldn't have as many problems like this later on.
Oh, and it bothers me that Ferb's portrayed as an asshole for a minute there. It's like, where the hell did that come from? I get that they both were being teased by that boy about having a step-dad, but where the hell did the whole "I know lawrence better than you" comment come from? The hell?
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Who--*reads icon* -_-;
But yeah, the Ferb bit annoyed me the most. It was completely random, dickish, and made no sense...
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Yeah. I mean, he's not even really supposed to talk at all, so where did this long douche of a sentence come from? It's ooc as hell.
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"Those Father's Day games are for dads and their kids; not dads and their stepkids."
Fucker. If someone said that to my brother or sister if they had something like that going on or whatever, I'd punch them. Because my siblings are my half-siblings, and my dad is their step-father. Kids are kids no matter what. He sees them as his own children, seeing as he only has one blood child.
" Two biological parents."
My sister and brother lived with their biological parents for maybe 5/9 years of their lives before my mom kicked their dad out. And then my sister ran away to her father's at 16...
A lot of my friends only live with one parent or their step father. Hell one of them lives with their mom (their dad was a cheating fucker) and her mom's boyfriend(s)
Half the kids probably at Phineas's school in this story probably don't even have two biological parents in their lives at all.
"Bullfuckingshit. Kids can't remember crap from when they were two years old. =/"
I agree, I mean, I can remember a little bit of what happened. like a few minutes from a part of a day that was huge in my life (like my dad's car getting smashed, my mom's fish tank exploding, and her coming home with her hand stitched up. all which happened at two or three) but not stuff like playing fucking drums and shit. I can barely remember what the hell I did last month!
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"My mom's fish tank exploding"
We're not going to talk about anything else until we learn the cause to this effect.
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I would love to tell you the actual story, but I cannot remember exactly what happened right now. If you reply and in the morning I will tell you the true one if I ask my mother.
What I can remember that made my mother's fish tank explode, was the the rocks or something in the tank made an explosion once it hit the water. I think that there was a lot of pressure going against the glass and it just broke fast and was like an explosion. All I remember of that day was her coming home with stiches due to the explosion and right before it exploded, when she was carrying the fish tank (it was a small fish tank) to the kitchen to clean it. Anyways, it blew up and made glass go all over the floor. I use to remember the full story, but I was last told that story the last time, in the summer of last year.
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I've read better stories about Phineas' "real dad" where the "real dad" was either an ass that wasted Linda's time or abusive. The stories where the "real dad" is perfect are boring.
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I just did a brief check: Lawrence is never referred to as "stepdad". In the first season, Candace and sometimes Phineas refer to Ferb as "step-brother", but nothing other than that.
Seriously. This story makes me sick.
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