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Creepypasta-girl666 β Rosemarie the Killer (creepypasta oc)
Published: 2015-07-04 22:29:07 +0000 UTC; Views: 3960; Favourites: 22; Downloads: 3
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Description
Okay this is my oc I hope you like her!Full name:Β Rosemarie Blinn
Weapon: Knife (obviously she is holding one XDD)
eye color: One eye is gold and the other is blue
Crushes: The rake, Jeff, Jane (she is bi)
I'll make her actual bio later in a journal X3
Nyaaa
base star4base.deviantart.com/art/gβ¦
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Comments: 58
poopsy the killer is repeating in my head right now
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cute i remaber I recoloered this once and safed it back then I dident know how to work a computer but I didn't post it any wear
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not to sound rude but this is a real question is this a joke?
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1.you have a horrible oc
2.I think am going to refix your ocΒ
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Not polite, rude, and disrespectfulΒ
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The rake???? But why??? I'd rather beat him with a shovel, actually that might be helpful in other situations, I'm gonna sleep with a shovel now.
Don't question me and my shovel, slurrrrrrrrpppppp
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I wouldent blame you ill sleep with a gun if offenderman was near my home town
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how to make a creepypasta mary sue:
name: ___ the killer
weapon: knife (duh)
love status: everyone (preferably jeff)
done
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mary sue :V
i woke up from the mary sue alarm :V
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*WOOP WOOP* Uh, oh. No offense but my Mary Sue alarms are going offΒ Β
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Elisa: Ok, I dont want to be mean or anything so please take this comment as an help for your OC.
1) If she is a proxy she would look like one. As you probably know Ticci Toby wears a brown hoodie and orange goggles, Hoodie wears a yellow hoodie and a black mask and Masky wears an orange jacket and a white mask.
You should make your OC wears a hoodie, a jacket or something similiar.
Fran:TWO!!
Elisa: Shut up.
2)Those hair.....uh.. they are red...and black, edgy.
Hear me out: THERE IS NO WAY that someone would take your OC seriously if she have those hair. You should change them to a normal hair color, like black, brown, blonde...
3)Jeff the killer has a knife, Jane the killer has a knife, Nina the MOTHERFUCKING killer has a knife! You should use a weapon that isn't used so much in OCs, to make her even more "original".
But, if using the knife is really important for the story, you should keep it.
4)The name. Take away the "the killer" and give her a more original creepypasta name that is inspired by the story.
5) Neko. Idk the story and now after this I'll go read it, but is being a neko that important? I mean a lot of people don't understand that creepypasta are supposed to scare the shit out of us, not to be kawaii, sugoi or other japanese names! So if I was you I'd take those cat ears and tail away.
6)Take all the Slenderman's simbols away, but if you REALLY think there has to be one, make it, but only one.
7)Those pink things she has on the shoulders. What are those?
8) Weird eyes. Make her have only blue (I think the other eye is blue...) eyes.
Sorry for any mistakes, I'm italian, so it isn't so simple to write in english. :3
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Mmmmmmmaybe not...
Here's just a list of things you might wanna change:
Nekos are neither believable or scary
Double eye colour is an obvious sign of a Mary Sue, specifically a self insert Mary Sue
Having any sort of love life immediately turns your 'creepypasta' into a Mary Sue
The knife doesn't help - maybe if you make your OC more like the Polymorphic Humanoid (www.youtube.com/watch?v=rQl9pF⦠) then it'll be scarier and more believable
The straps are edgy, not scary
I really hope that you can improve those things! I think a more wolf-like version of the Polymorphic Humanoid would work, so you might as well try that c:
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just saying but your oc looks like a boy attracter??? i dont know like sheeeeeeet I'm dumb
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By boy attracter you mean?
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I have some advice:
Try taking the proxy symbols off her. Or at least off her chest. And if she's going to be a Slenderman proxy, look at Marbles Hornets, and Ticci Toby, see how they look? Their clothing looks more normal. And they're pretty scary. Seriously, I had a nightmare where Masky came out from under my bed and killed me. And keep her eyes just one natural color, unless she is like a demon, or has creepy eyes. And maybe change the clothes. They look too revealing. Also, what is the strap on her leg for? Also please for the love of God take the tail and ears off. It isn't scary and I'm not trying to be mean at all, but they make her look kinda stupid. And the scars on her shoulders look to...perfect if you know what I mean. I don't think you can be born with perfect scars, so make them a little less symmetrical and kinda jagged or somethin', ya' know? And lastly, give her a different weapon and I know it's a bit hard to think of a good weapon but knives are overused.
She could be a good OC but improve her a little. You don't even have to listen to me, listen to the people in the comments. 
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couldn't have said it better.
only thing: masky and hoodie from marble hornets are not slender proxies since slenderman and the operator are two different beings plus they kinda hate the operator so looking at the for a slenderproxy design isn't like really logical
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Okay, thank you haha
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I'm not sure if this is a joke character or not, if not have some pointers!
1. Creepy suspicious looking character.
2. Use an uncommonly used weapon that'd scare someone Ex: Pistol, shotgun.
3. Make the story realistic, don't use: Blood, Gore, Hyper realism, or over the top death scenes.
4. Don't use shocking subjects as plot devices. (Rape, murder, etc. Also, a plot device is something that moves the plot forward)
5. Don't have bullying, or parental abuse in the story. It's overused.
6. Don't use violence against minors/animals, if so, bring your A game.
7. I recommend not doing a proxy oc, if so, like animal/minor abuse, bring your A game.
8. Give them a personality.
Onto to appearance tips.
9.Hoodies, converse, skinny jeans. Are overused in the creepypasta Fandom.
10. Don't underdress them, please.
11. Furrys aren't scary.
Anyways, follow these tips and I'm sure she'll be a good character.
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Furries can be scary actually
and she started out as a joke character .-.
I plan on making her better
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Maybe plating her ears with metal tips that kill people? Maybe she was in the circus as a child?
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Nah I hve other ideas
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May I hear them?
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Well I was gonna change her hair and her clothes and her boobs are gonna be smaller and also half her tail is gonna be ripped off and her ear is stitched (only one of them)
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What about her story?
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Can you provide me with a link to her bio when you get it finished? I would like to see more information on her to see if her story can justify her appearance. Speaking of which, you might want to change her looks a bit. At the position she is in right now, the appearance doesn't look to scary. The animal characteristics, multi-colored eyes, and revealing clothing don't exactly scream frightening. Maybe change it to something that would be more comfortable, say like a sweatshirt and some kind of baggy pants. It would be more suitable if she lives in the woods because she could withstand cold nights better. And while it may not be the most fashionable choice, I don't think killers would care about looking good anyway. As for the animal stuff, you might want to put a reason as to why she has them. You might could say her father was a drunken scientist and one day while he was drunk he extracted cat genes into his wife, resulting in their child having cat traits. With that you could make her look more beastly, it would add more creepyness to her. For the eyes maybe change them to a blue and green combination. Maybe the green came from the cat and the blue was from regular genes. Also since dyed hair is seen as a mary-sue trait, I have some advice for that too. If you still want to make her hair stand out, you could make a few small parts of hair black and the rest brown. (Also I've been imagining the cat as a black cat with green eyes however you could do whatever cat combo you want) Don't just make the tips black though because some people may mistake it as dyed hair, maybe scatter it throughout the hair. Also for the backstory, don't put in abuse, rape, or any very sensitive topic, it's extremely cliche. As for what you could put in, I can't think of anything right now, but maybe you might have an idea. I don't exactly know how she would kill either since I can't think of a backstory. But maybe take out the knife because in the fandom knives are almost the symbol of clicheness, unless you could add an original twist to it. That I think wraps it up. Hope this helped and it wasn't too long =3 Hope this wasn't too rude as well.
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Nonono!
This wasn't rude at all I was planning on making her better actually
Thank you for the ideas its pretty awesome of you cx
And I wasn't going to include rape or anything, that would be messed up :c
I think I died because you were so nice to me ;w;
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XD Glad I helped ^^ I'm really lucky because there are some people who even when you try to be as nice as you can while leaving a critique, they'll just be really hurtful when they respond and say something like '' mi versin o ______ iz betur ur versin o him/her suks'' And yes, they also have really bad grammar, but yeah I'm lucky that you're a really nice person and you listened to my advice ^-^Β so thanks =3
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Well honestly I was gonna make this account and be like mary sue as a joke but honestly you inspired me to make her like cool cx
it is kinda hard when someone is super nice and gives you awesome ideas Β that I have to use now
Do you think it would be cool if her tail the top half got ripped off?
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Yeah! That sounds really awesome ^^Β More advice: Some people see OCs that have really long names with the killer after it as a mary sue trait, so maybe change her name to something similar to Beastly Bella or something like that. You don't have to but I recommend it.
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What is she exactly?
A fox? She not that scary...
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