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BatmanWithBunnyEars — alone.
Published: 2009-12-14 01:55:47 +0000 UTC; Views: 1156; Favourites: 18; Downloads: 18
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Description
After the rigor of my previous deviation, I wanted to try something simpler.
I hope you like it. 
Two 5-7-5 Haikus
Stock used: Space Dust by
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Comments: 16
there are many things I like about this:
first, the placement of the words. . .it's on the left, so it's not like an afterthought, but because it's on the bottom, you have a little bit of time to process the image first, which gives you a sense of calm and silence to begin with.
because you begin each haiku as sort of a definition, there is a feeling of detachment, backed up by the passive tense in the first stanza, and then by the subject "they" in the second instead of something that includes yourself.
I love the meaning of this too, (and how you explained it so well with so few words,) because I feel that I can relate to it - you long for someone to understand you, and yet don't hold much hope. after all, you are admired often. . .the pairing "arcane allure" works so well in this, and it's so calmly (and beautifully) cynical, because even your mystery attracts people, and yet they don't know you.
I also like the way you used "cold" and "desert" to describe the same place, because it makes me think of antarctica. . .and then you throw in "cosmic" and it turns into the northern lights. . .and then I look at the picture, and it's just wonderful, haha.
lastly, my very favorite line has to be "but they don't know how cold it is," and I do want to commend you once again in fitting all of this into two simple haikus - very well done!
(whew, that was long 
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Wow, you put a lot of thought into this! What you wrote is close to what I had in mind, although I was actually relating the pedestal of talent and corresponding admiration to the lonliness of being overwhelmed by the vastness of space. The "arcane allure" is meant to apply to the situation of being gifted, and how desirable that seems to the casual observer. Describing the interstellar space as a cold cosmic desert (as in, devoid of life) is meant to relate to the isolated feeling of not being able to relate to anyone because your gifted mind makes you so different from those around you. Thanks for the detailed critique, though!
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yeah, that makes perfect sense!
haha you're welcome :]
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Thanks! Glad you like it.
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The haikus seem to flow quite well. They also fit quite well with the amazing photo of the heavens.
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Thanks! I tried to make everything go together. Kind of like, Feng Shui for poetry.
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This was my first serious attempt at Haiku, so I'm glad you like it!
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