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Alpner — Quote #54
Published: 2012-05-17 09:32:31 +0000 UTC; Views: 23018; Favourites: 1607; Downloads: 296
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Description
I do not own any of the quotes in my collection. Most of them were found on the web and I only pick the best out of them. I made these (800x600) images, to print out little entertaining stickers, with minimalistic approach - that's why there is no background.Because of huge positive feedback among my friends I uploaded them to various sites and here on DA they quickly became huge "hit". I do not consider this as art, but I get more and more requests everyday so I will keep uploading them.
Some of them are just pure fun, some racist or sexually offensive, maybe both, and occasionally with really poor grammar, for which I deeply apologize - please correct me! I will do my best. My intention here is just to make you smile, and nothing more. Hope you like them, but if you don't I don't care...
I don't have anything against sharing them, you can use it where you want, whenever you want. The only "copyright" here is the whole collection, not the single quotes. Enjoy!
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Comments: 122
I think I need to change the folder I put this Deviation into from ‘lol, to ‘lmao’
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I just thought of a funnier one, I've got the body where do you want me to put it?
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I want to do that but you could get seriously arrested for that 
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Or send a message to your self! o.O That works too! Especially for Forever Alones
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I've actually gotten a text exactly like that from some random number.
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My little sister did this last week, my cousin was so confused xD
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when i'm bored, i sent a text to a random number saying " I'm Pregnant "
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have you tried it? it's more save than hid a body. seriously. 
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Actually happened in France . The girl got arrested and was sent to jail .
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I just did that! The person replyed "Now we just wait..." heheh
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"Okay. Here's what we're going to do. You come to my place. Bring the rope and the trashbags. I'll get the Hannah Montana DVDs and the mayonnaise."
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Now you burn the rest of the evidence, change your name, and move to Cleveland....
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I love these so much. They all make me laugh so hard!! : )))
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Wait..........so have you hidden the body or do I have to do it myself?
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They were like: WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?! I DON'T EVEN KNOW YOU!
or something related to that. X3
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LMAO!!!!!!!!! I wrote some seriously creepy poetry one time, that I was gonna send as a prank text to a friend, but I didn't in the end, cos I thought it was too creepy. I could send it to you though if you wanted to use it!
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XD I would use it, actually. X3
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Do you not understand how enticing those veins in your neck are to me?
Do you not yet comprehend the deliciousness of your own flesh?
Ah, but to caress you lovingly with this hacksaw blade, to kiss away your lifeblood, such pleasure!
The sensation of an open wound, veins throbbing softly.
May I yet capture your screams, so perfect in their pure hysteria,
The taste of your fear is so intoxicating,
One could get drunk on it like wine.
The frenzy of your panic I find exhilarating.
As I clamp my hand over your mouth, and pull you into the darkness which now surrounds us,
May you be enshrouded in the knowledge that this will not end soon.
You will suffer long, your agony substaining us throughout the night.
For your pain is divine; your eyes dimming, your soul snuffs out.
Your screams and thrashings do nothing,
for my arms lock around your body, wrapped in a final embrace.
You are mine forever now; I shall keep you eternal,
My darling,
My precious,
Mine.
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You my friend have talent!
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wow, that is ominous. I love it
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Thanx :3 My mum accidently saw when I was typing it and just about had a heart attack! I took ages trying to calm her out of hysterics! You can keep it if you want, I don't think I really want it now after the explosions that go on in my house! lol
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It's all fun and games until someone doesn't get the joke, registers your number and calls the police.
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Coll dibs, bro, the only thing is...
MY GRANDMA TAUGHT ME THIS!!!
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