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addem — eternity

Published: 2004-04-26 19:13:57 +0000 UTC; Views: 189; Favourites: 1; Downloads: 87
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Description Open your mouth,
I hear a dial tone.
What's your number?
Is it between five and seven?
Its time to dial.
No rotary
But
When you sleep,
I navigate your dreams.
I pretend
I am you.
All this I get
for a quarter
of a century
before I open my eyes
to a new day
of eternity.
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Comments: 10

underln [2004-10-30 22:43:19 +0000 UTC]

barefootliam already said this, but I enjoy how your words change meanings as you read on. You think one thing and then next line changes context completely. "When you sleep,
I navigate your dreams." isn't really an example of that, but still lovely wording, my favorite lines in this piece

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addem In reply to underln [2004-11-05 13:15:31 +0000 UTC]

thank you

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Jstermn [2004-09-08 13:07:29 +0000 UTC]

unusual...intresting....unlike the others which made me feel.....this one made me think....and i like the one i faved because it did both.....

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addem In reply to Jstermn [2004-09-08 16:44:57 +0000 UTC]

thank you for taking the time to breeze through my gallery.
you are not only a good artist, but a good deviant.

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Jstermn In reply to addem [2004-09-08 17:30:11 +0000 UTC]

thank you kindly sir....and no problem...i try to take a look at anyone who takes the time to say anything to me on DA.....

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cerialboy12 [2004-05-02 05:53:07 +0000 UTC]

i like it, like usual.

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addem In reply to cerialboy12 [2004-05-02 16:27:51 +0000 UTC]

thanks man! I always appreciate your comments.

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barefootliam [2004-04-28 10:30:03 +0000 UTC]

I like the way words sometimes have two meanings (quarter/quarter) and the way you've used that to control rhythm and make a cadence. There's layer on layer of surprises here.

Liam

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addem In reply to barefootliam [2004-04-28 17:37:53 +0000 UTC]

thank you Liam. I appreciate the comment. it seems most of my writing is done with either double meanings, and/or it's more lyrical than anything else. oh, and short! cant forget that! After your random stop, I caroused your gallery and was quite impressed. but you already know this as im sure you have recieved the comment. thanks again for stopping by. i'll be keeping an eye on you.

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barefootliam In reply to addem [2004-04-28 19:19:03 +0000 UTC]

Thanks!

Yes, it was a random stop from browsing recent deviations I think.
Or maybe you left a comment on something by ~PoeticWar or somewhere. I remember the destination but not the journey, sometimes, it comes of too much travel

And yes, thanks for looking!

Liam

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