SageFeathers In reply to Bowser81889 [2016-06-01 13:31:53 +0000 UTC]

How did you know I was in major need of a hug?  I suppose... things could be better at the moment.  How are you?

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Bowser81889 In reply to SageFeathers [2016-06-01 17:42:33 +0000 UTC]

Sometimes something clicks in your mind and you just know, heh. I'm sorry to hear things aren't all that great on your end there. I myself am going through a few things, but trying to stay as well as I can. Can be tough, but...trying, haha.

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SageFeathers In reply to Bowser81889 [2016-06-01 22:07:01 +0000 UTC]

Indeed.  I seem to have run into some depressing times.  This life thing is hard at times.

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Bowser81889 In reply to SageFeathers [2016-06-01 22:18:35 +0000 UTC]

Sure can be. I seem to be stuck in some endless loop of the same things going on with me day in and day out, and wanting to change a bit or do some different things in my day and then...stuff factors in and it's the same old stuff by the end of the day. And a bit of insomnia here and there...no fun.

If you ever wanna talk though, let me know!

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SageFeathers In reply to Bowser81889 [2016-06-09 15:19:41 +0000 UTC]

I just keep finding myself alone because of my high anxiety.  Nobody wants to be around that and I don't blame them at all.

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Bowser81889 In reply to SageFeathers [2016-06-09 22:11:29 +0000 UTC]

Dang. Kat, let me just tell you that you're not alone. I've been going through that myself a mega ton since late 2014. It's definitely made life tougher in different respects. I can relate to the feeling of not wanting to be a burden on other people because of it, but you don't need to truly be or feel alone. There are people out there who care enough to not let that stop them from being around you, and that includes me.

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SageFeathers In reply to Bowser81889 [2016-06-17 02:22:40 +0000 UTC]

Thank you, that makes me feel better somewhat.  My anxiety can get so bad sometimes that it leaks out into the way I speak.  I'm always watching what I say to people just so they don't go running for the hills.  It seems I can't be myself at times.

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Bowser81889 In reply to SageFeathers [2016-06-17 04:55:49 +0000 UTC]

It happens to me too, a lot, and it's occurred much more frequently since around 2014.  Hasn't made life any easier, and different health issues get in the way too so it can feel like I'm carrying around a lot of luggage day to day.  Just know that it can help to speak your mind, rather than keep everything bottled up, and try to keep your head up the best you can Kat.  You're a good person, and deserve to enjoy life to the fullest.

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SageFeathers In reply to Bowser81889 [2016-06-23 04:49:53 +0000 UTC]

Thank you, that means a lot to me.  At times it feels like I've taken so many missteps that it begins to create the illusion of my own depreciation.  I also feel that this last time I have learned a valuable lesson in love and that is to take as much time as one possibly can to enjoy every last detail as it is unfolding and to not allow the essence of the passage of time to interfere with that.  Patience is definitely my life's theme.

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Bowser81889 In reply to SageFeathers [2016-06-23 06:03:35 +0000 UTC]

Patience is indeed a virtue, and not many can say they fully live by it, or at least come close. There's times in my day I experience anxiety even just when sitting, or even walking...both times I felt it tonight. It's very discomforting, and can leave me feeling blind to enjoying the moment at hand to the point I feel like an utter zombie wanting to jump out of my skin, yet I know I have to try to keep going somehow. They say some of the quietist people have the loudest of minds, and I find that to be very true. It's important to grasp any kind of control you can wrangle of it though at any time, because in the end, you have to remember you're here for a good reason and deserve to live and be happy.

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SageFeathers In reply to Bowser81889 [2016-06-28 09:00:44 +0000 UTC]

Gah, you're me!  I haven't been very careful with my words lately and it's the reason for my demise.  I sometimes come across as too brash especially to those who have fragile emotions and then I feel like worst piece to ever walk the planet when they take things the wrong way.

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Bowser81889 In reply to SageFeathers [2016-06-28 20:09:41 +0000 UTC]

I can definitely relate there. What's interesting is how sometimes I try to help others who are in similar situations I've been in but I seem to frustrate some with my 'can-do never give up' attitude, almost like I come off too strongly for them. It's almost like I temporarily snap out of my own problems and try to be a guiding light, but if I get shot down by the other person, it genuinely hurts and I kind of withdraw back into my shell again. As much as I want to help others, sometimes it just isn't always my strong suit.

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SageFeathers In reply to Bowser81889 [2016-06-30 17:11:02 +0000 UTC]

I think my issue is I speak my mind too much.  I can be too opinionated and inquisitive, and some ideas should definitely be withheld at times.  I guess this life thing is just one big lesson.  The most painful part is that I have ruined some potentially wonderful relationships with my ignorance.  I cannot reclaim any of it, and that's my biggest downfall. -_-

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Bowser81889 In reply to SageFeathers [2016-06-30 22:38:42 +0000 UTC]

I don't think that's necessarily true, Kat. I mean, I can't speak on your behalf because I don't know the exact situation of what went on, but let me tell you...I've certainly been there. Over the past few years I had let my state of depression cause distance to be put between myself and some good friends I've made on here that I had known for a long time. They couldn't really see why, and then less and less we would talk until we interacted no more. It took me a few years to see the error of my ways of letting depression get the better of me before I realized this wasn't how I wanted it to remain. All those years I knew I wanted to make up with them but just didn't know how or if they'd even accept me back. One at a time though, I gradually reached out to them to try to mend fences, and although it took a little bit of doing to admit my mistakes and I knew I was nervous at how they'd respond, I was able to regain the friendships I had lost. Not all of them, but a few I was able to regain and I'm happier knowing I made that attempt.

I hope there's some way things can be worked out on your end. Who knows? Maybe they can be.

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SageFeathers In reply to Bowser81889 [2016-07-01 08:01:58 +0000 UTC]

I feel like time is of the essence with my situation.  I just need to give it time and have patience.  I really have a hard time with anything that deals with patience and I never was like this.  I have no idea why all of a sudden I'm finding it difficult to just let things be and I'm impulsive on top of that.  It's not a good mix and I truly need to find a way to revert back to the way I used to be.  We live in such a "now" environment where we want things to happen yesterday and everything will be good and well in our worlds when in fact certain situations might require months or even years to heal.  We don't like to think about that because anything could happen within that time frame.  Life is much too short to worry and we need that instant gratification or at least the benefit of knowing we didn't do something completely irreversible.  I'm so stuck in the mud right now and all I'm running on is hope that tomorrow will be better and I won't wake up depressed to hell.

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Bowser81889 In reply to SageFeathers [2016-07-01 08:34:46 +0000 UTC]

Believe me, I live like that quite often. Being at the end of yet another day, with whatever the case that may have brought some clouds into my day, I always seem to hope and pray the next day will be better once I get some sleep. There's just some things in life we cannot change and we have to accept it, but other things in life...like trying to improve facets of our personalities or outlook on life or mending fences with those we care about...well, there's always opportunities like those that we can in fact change. There's times where I lose my own patience and cool and wish for things to be the way I'd like them to be in that moment...but life is always ready to throw twists and turns in our path and direction and it's up to us in how we decide to deal with them. In some ways it's almost humbling, and suddenly we realize our situations aren't as bad as we make them out to be. We open our eyes up a bit, look around a little more, and learn to appreciate what we do have instead of what we don't...and it motivates us to become better people all the more because of what we've seen.

I'm confident in you Kat, and I believe things can get better in your case. You just need to keep believing, and stay persistent in making those positive changes happen. Over time, you'll know when you see them as a result of your good deeds.

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SageFeathers In reply to Bowser81889 [2016-07-05 09:56:09 +0000 UTC]

 Thank you for the awesome encouragement.  You are absolutely right.  I'm beginning little-by-little to turn my negatives into positives whenever I can, but it's difficult when anger or confusion clouds my vision.  It's something I need to learn where the switch is and turn it off as soon as it appears.

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Bowser81889 In reply to SageFeathers [2016-07-06 00:03:32 +0000 UTC]

Believe me, despite my words of encouragement, you can bet on us both still having these times where things seem to fall apart and we wonder how we'll be able to get over those pitfalls...and yes, there will be times where our emotions may still get the better of us. No human being is perfect and we have to remember that our minds are all chemically-wired, meaning we might struggle to act one way but things may take a turn in ways we don't want them to. But as long as we keep trying, keep going, doing our best, keeping the faith alive and being persistent in trying to achieve the best quality of life we can currently be at in our lives, then something has got to give for the better at some point...and no one can fault you for a lack of trying. I'm honestly proud of you for your endurance and kindhearted spirit through it all, and even your 'get back up and try again' nature inspires me too. I appreciate being able to have these kinds of discussions with you.

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SageFeathers In reply to Bowser81889 [2016-07-06 03:33:32 +0000 UTC]

I do, too, and definitely!  If we don't get back up after our failures then we give up on ourselves.  I am always filled with "what-ifs" and "should haves" which aren't healthy at all.  I hate to dwell, but sometimes it's nearly impossible not to do so especially when such strong emotions have become so intertwined with the situation.

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Bowser81889 In reply to SageFeathers [2016-07-06 04:59:59 +0000 UTC]

Definitely a wise choice of words. So many times I come close to that feeling, and I just try and get through whatever moments are troubling me in hopes there will be better moments of peace and happiness ahead. I'm a huge dweller especially on the past, and wondering what could've been had I done or not done certain things...but I still always have to realize the past is not able to be changed but hopefully what can be is the here and now for a brighter tomorrow.

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SageFeathers In reply to Bowser81889 [2016-07-07 07:10:16 +0000 UTC]

Exactly.  That's the best mindset we can have.  It's good to reflect on the past but we can use that to forge our future.

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Bowser81889 In reply to SageFeathers [2016-07-07 20:32:21 +0000 UTC]

Good to know we both share agreement in that.

I just sure hope I get some actual sleep tonight. Sort of been up since 3:30 PM yesterday. >_<;

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SageFeathers In reply to Bowser81889 [2016-07-14 00:42:22 +0000 UTC]

I get insomnia sometimes.  It's difficult to sleep when your mind keeps running like the White Rabbit.

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Bowser81889 In reply to SageFeathers [2016-07-14 03:50:06 +0000 UTC]

Yeah, definitely. Been a tough week trying to get much sleep. Not easy either when you have to keep getting up for other reasons too.

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SageFeathers In reply to GreyxPapp97 [2015-01-07 13:42:33 +0000 UTC]

haha yes, definitely!

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SageFeathers In reply to YoshiUnity [2014-10-25 16:01:18 +0000 UTC]

You are welcome.  I have been just okay.  Yourself?

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YoshiUnity In reply to SageFeathers [2014-10-25 17:17:02 +0000 UTC]

I've been great. Been attending a job and currently a student at the local Art Institute. I can't wait to finish it up so I can start drawing a bit more freely again. Plus I'm doing commissions on the side for extra change.

So it's been a art-tastic time for me, lately! XP

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SageFeathers In reply to YoshiUnity [2014-10-26 16:20:52 +0000 UTC]

That is awesome.  I'm sure your skills are knocking them off their feet already.  I can't wait to see what you have in store for us down the road.

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YoshiUnity In reply to SageFeathers [2014-10-27 04:02:31 +0000 UTC]

Thank you! I also can't wait to see what you have to offer as well. Your skills were always wonderful and they have became even better.

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SageFeathers In reply to AceOfStCanardKLy [2013-10-11 00:44:20 +0000 UTC]

Hello Katrina!

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SageFeathers In reply to onyxsucksatdrawing [2013-03-10 01:49:15 +0000 UTC]

Thanks for the invite!

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onyxsucksatdrawing In reply to SageFeathers [2013-03-10 02:07:58 +0000 UTC]

np~

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SageFeathers In reply to B-Plushi [2013-02-15 11:37:07 +0000 UTC]

Happy Valentine's Day to you, too!

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B-Plushi In reply to SageFeathers [2013-02-16 04:31:03 +0000 UTC]

Thanks!

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SageFeathers In reply to 80markus [2013-01-19 22:33:48 +0000 UTC]

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SageFeathers In reply to RallsyArt [2012-10-12 21:24:08 +0000 UTC]

Aren't you from NSider?

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RallsyArt In reply to SageFeathers [2012-10-14 18:13:42 +0000 UTC]

Yes, I was on Nsider all those years ago!
I knew something was familiar haha

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