ArkAngelHFB In reply to DrgnMster [2013-07-27 10:04:55 +0000 UTC]

Fix your "a" key

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DrgnMster In reply to ArkAngelHFB [2013-07-30 03:36:10 +0000 UTC]

Learn to spell you're contractions correctly.

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ArkAngelHFB In reply to CNTran [2009-06-13 02:53:52 +0000 UTC]

Been really busy but things are going well... ^_^

I'm currently re-writting Chapter 4... but pretty much everything up to chapter 20 has been planed out. ^_^

So how are things going with you?

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CNTran In reply to ArkAngelHFB [2009-06-13 03:06:41 +0000 UTC]

Awesome. How many chapters in total are u planning out?

and, when you start your manga, please let me know! :]

Things with me? STRESS FROM SCHOOL IS THROW TONS OF WEIGHT ON MY SHOULDERS. But I only have three more days left. HAHAHA. :]

And, I'm going to start spin-offs of my original manga storyline this summer vacation. In other words, you know how my soon-to-be-manga is entitled Riding Tempest? What I'm going to do before i start on that one is make short-stories about individual major characters and then next year, I'll branch into the main one. So that way, I'll be linking all the characters together when I finally start on the main storyline. The problem is, I have like 6 major characters, so that means 6 stories. That make take a while lol

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ArkAngelHFB In reply to CNTran [2009-06-15 19:02:26 +0000 UTC]

Yeah it will take some time but sound really cool... ^_^ keep me up to date. ^_^

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ArkAngelHFB In reply to Aiko-Hanayami [2009-02-02 06:01:22 +0000 UTC]

Epic fail... nope my names Max. ^_^

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Aiko-Hanayami In reply to ArkAngelHFB [2009-02-02 06:09:14 +0000 UTC]

Hahaha, sorry. You know , right (WELL OBVIOUSLY)? I thought you were a mutual friend of ours IRL, since I knew he likes to write, too.

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ArkAngelHFB In reply to Aiko-Hanayami [2009-02-02 06:19:04 +0000 UTC]

No I'm Max aka Ark. I also like to Write though. ^_^

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Aiko-Hanayami In reply to ArkAngelHFB [2009-02-02 06:27:32 +0000 UTC]

Haha, coincidence: me too. xD I just haven't written anything to completion for a REALLY long time.

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ArkAngelHFB In reply to Aiko-Hanayami [2009-02-02 06:30:25 +0000 UTC]

My stories are all to freiking long to finish. T_T I have no time between college, band, writting songs, trying to find an artist.

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Aiko-Hanayami In reply to ArkAngelHFB [2009-02-02 06:43:09 +0000 UTC]

Oh, mine are pretty short, but I always get sick of my ideas before they finish. xD Haha, you sound a lot more busy than me, too. |D I just have sports and school.

Songs? Haha, I tried writing some, once upon a time. then I figured out: I SUCK. xD

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ArkAngelHFB In reply to Aiko-Hanayami [2009-02-02 06:46:45 +0000 UTC]

and now to sound erogant... I rock... you can ask Chris ^_^

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Aiko-Hanayami In reply to ArkAngelHFB [2009-02-02 06:48:11 +0000 UTC]

Hahaha, do you have a link to the stuff you write? Like FictionPress/FanFiction.net? Or some sort of website?

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ArkAngelHFB In reply to Aiko-Hanayami [2009-02-02 06:51:06 +0000 UTC]

[link]

not my best work but it's ok.

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Aiko-Hanayami In reply to ArkAngelHFB [2009-02-02 07:14:30 +0000 UTC]

Short chapter. xD Hope you don't mind if I crit.

There are some simple typos, like "ware six rooms," "dinning room," etc, that could be easily fixed. Instead of describing how she looked, just straight out, it might be easier to describe the way she looked, as she was doing something. ie: Akane, wearing the same letterman jacket (number 2, One Better, she remembered) she'd received in high school, stood up so fast the chair she was sitting on tumbled back making a loud crashing sound which echo through the three story open apartment.
Or something. It does depend on personal preference, but I feel your sentence structure is sort of rigid; it doesn't flow as freely as it could. Rather than worrying about how to introduce and immediately give the basic info about a character, it might be easier to let the reader decipher that as he or she reads by revealing characteristics and traits (physical included) as you go.

Other than that, I think you should be off to a pretty good start!

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ArkAngelHFB In reply to Aiko-Hanayami [2009-02-02 07:42:16 +0000 UTC]

Yea well this is the redo of this chapter... I get into the whole problem of feeling the need to explain about the character beacouse this was a contest intry and well, no other chapter will make it into the contest.

It needs work... normally I like to throw in some random mindless stuff like I had origenally thought about having her be cooking and burning stuff and blowing up at the stove and sunil critizing her from behind a book... but I wanted to keep it short... I have rule that a chapter should never be above 2000 words, or below 1000.

sometimes it bites me though,

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ArkAngelHFB In reply to Deamond-89 [2009-01-30 22:44:00 +0000 UTC]

well yea... I have see how your manga goes... I don't normal get into manga but I like your so yea... waitting on more of the good stuff. ^_^

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ArkAngelHFB In reply to happygoluckyy [2008-12-09 05:13:37 +0000 UTC]

DId you get my email???

also awesome avitar... mine sucks. lol

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