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kenzie — I am a Prism
Published: 2002-03-27 23:28:35 +0000 UTC; Views: 176; Favourites: 0; Downloads: 13
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Description
I am a prismSend in any sort of light
And I’ll only give you my rainbows
The connecting void between the two realms
Of color and ordinary light
I close my eyes
And you sing yourself through my eyelids
My fingertips grow flowers and touch your face
I am drowning in an ocean of yellow light
Flailing in a heat that is at once beautiful and terrifying
Not able to breath
Except maybe to laugh or sing
Or cry out in a startled tone “I love you!”
So afraid of drowning in my own happiness
Forgetting any other home but this
My legs kick to the surface
I am clear as a crystal
Send in any sort of emotion
And I’ll only give you my rainbows
The connecting void between two realms
Of love and ordinary life
I am a prism
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Comments: 6
The first three lines made me smile, amazing poem. I could never write a poem about being in love, you captured it beautifully though!
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like bonhomme said i like the way you do a internal visualization of yourself.
you have great skills!
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You are definetly one of my favorite poets on devianart. Your work is sensational. Keep it up!
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I like the premise and the internal visualization of yourself.
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In premise it reminds me of Lowra's "Do Not Need The World" https://www.deviantart.com/deviation.php? id=223417. I don't like the "Not able to breath" bit, other than that I think it's great. It's definitely interesting... Did you think this one over or did you let it flow? It befuddles me a bit, which has happened to me a lot with poetry lately. It starts out very strong, I really like the beginning. I still think you should try shortening some of these, but do what you want. Great job, all in all! Love,
- Ed
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a ball of fire that makes rainbows? i don't know about the whole rainbow thing. and throw an "e" on breath
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