Comments: 6
angel112183 [2002-07-11 00:48:53 +0000 UTC]
The first three lines made me smile, amazing poem. I could never write a poem about being in love, you captured it beautifully though!
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spoken [2002-04-07 02:57:07 +0000 UTC]
like bonhomme said i like the way you do a internal visualization of yourself.
you have great skills!
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whisperingstorm [2002-03-30 06:39:26 +0000 UTC]
You are definetly one of my favorite poets on devianart. Your work is sensational. Keep it up!
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bonhomme [2002-03-28 08:56:50 +0000 UTC]
I like the premise and the internal visualization of yourself.
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neptune27 [2002-03-28 00:46:23 +0000 UTC]
In premise it reminds me of Lowra's "Do Not Need The World" https://www.deviantart.com/deviation.php? id=223417. I don't like the "Not able to breath" bit, other than that I think it's great. It's definitely interesting... Did you think this one over or did you let it flow? It befuddles me a bit, which has happened to me a lot with poetry lately. It starts out very strong, I really like the beginning. I still think you should try shortening some of these, but do what you want. Great job, all in all! Love,
- Ed
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ftwdesigns [2002-03-28 00:40:20 +0000 UTC]
a ball of fire that makes rainbows? i don't know about the whole rainbow thing. and throw an "e" on breath
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