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kenzie — A Hammer
Published: 2002-04-17 02:06:58 +0000 UTC; Views: 109; Favourites: 0; Downloads: 8
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Description Just when I think your lips are in reach
I lean forward to fade into you
I swing like a hammer
And curse when I hit my thumb
Missed the nail by a quarter of an inch
Enough for me to bleed by
So, instead I bring my lips to my injured self
And lay kisses on the liquid life
Spilling from my opened skin
Push it at you
You made it, now drink of your creation
Bastard Dr. Frankenstein, you back away
In dire terror of the demon monster you have created
But you shouldn't even be surprised
All you did was cut in half
That which had already existed
But now, soaked by blood and sweat
Covered with the mark of some hidden leprosy
Only you can see
I back away
To bandage myself
For another day
When the hammer may swing
And hit another heart
Or another finger.
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Comments: 6

worldruler25 [2002-04-19 20:41:30 +0000 UTC]

This brings out the sadistic side in me; I like it! The part I like best begins at "You made it, now drink of your creation". Finally, a poem involving evil, bloody imagery!

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estherbadester [2002-04-18 19:36:07 +0000 UTC]

wow- kenzie! it took me a couple times through, I love the detail, the expresion! this poem is on a topic in which I haven't read of yours yet... and it amazed me. so... painful.. I love your metaphore throught the whole thing... the hammar, frankenstein. wow.

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starladear6 [2002-04-17 23:33:59 +0000 UTC]

Excellent use of such contrasting images... a kiss, a hammer, angst and longing. Beautiful.
-----
Sugu koko ni omoshiroi kotoba ga aru.
Soon there will be interesting words here.

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neptune27 [2002-04-17 21:44:17 +0000 UTC]

"Maxwell's silver hammer came down upon her head..."

Definitely quite well-written.

- Ed

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lowra [2002-04-17 02:36:49 +0000 UTC]

God...this whole damn thing is good. I love the structure..I don't know..it just fits really well with the content of the poem. It's quite painful, but that is what makes it great in this case..you can feel the emotion...great job!

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-tank [2002-04-17 02:15:12 +0000 UTC]

wow...i love the ending to this...and the line 'I lean forward to fade into you'...amazing...great work
-tank

-=don't fear to imagine=-

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