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Description
Unemployment rates remain high among nations badly drawn population.

By Bigfat Fakename
National Madeuppaper.

Dayton, Ohio - Mr. sketchy stands behind the counter at a local Starbucks, ringing up a double mocha frappachino. He's one of the lucky ones. For the last year, unemployment rates have steadily gone up for the nations population of badly drawn sketches and doodles. Where once they could find steady employment, a decrease in shitty webcomics coupled with a lower number of new students attending college, thus lowering the available space in notebook margins, has left many of these primitive illustrations without work. In their desperation, some are turning to a life of crime, smuggling number two pencils across the American-Mexican border. Others have simply ended up on the streets, begging for spare change.
"it's quite different from a few years ago" said Johnny Bighand, a doodle with an enormous right hand topped with a giant thumb. Johnny has been living on the streets for six months now. "I used to work for a car insurance firm. All they asked was that I smile and give a big thumbs-up on their billboard. Then they decided to start using actual people in their ads instead." Johnny isn't bitter, though. "they offered me a job in data entry, but really... with my hands? I didn't stand a chance."
some are still able to find legitimate employment, such as Mr. sketchy, or Sticks McShovel, internationally famous as the "construction sign stick figure". Mr. McShovel said in a statement that while he felt for his fellow cheap illustrations, and wished he could help them out, "there simply aren't enough signs to go around"
Johnny Bighand still remains hopeful, though. "maybe I can go back to college, meet a new illustrator, maybe get a different facial expression. But right now it's day to day. I'm just trying to avoid getting erased"

Description
Unemployment rates remain high among nations badly drawn population.

By Bigfat Fakename
National Madeuppaper.

Dayton, Ohio - Mr. sketchy stands behind the counter at a local Starbucks, ringing up a double mocha frappachino. He's one of the lucky ones. For the last year, unemployment rates have steadily gone up for the nations population of badly drawn sketches and doodles. Where once they could find steady employment, a decrease in shitty webcomics coupled with a lower number of new students attending college, thus lowering the available space in notebook margins, has left many of these primitive illustrations without work. In their desperation, some are turning to a life of crime, smuggling number two pencils across the American-Mexican border. Others have simply ended up on the streets, begging for spare change.
"it's quite different from a few years ago" said Johnny Bighand, a doodle with an enormous right hand topped with a giant thumb. Johnny has been living on the streets for six months now. "I used to work for a car insurance firm. All they asked was that I smile and give a big thumbs-up on their billboard. Then they decided to start using actual people in their ads instead." Johnny isn't bitter, though. "they offered me a job in data entry, but really... with my hands? I didn't stand a chance."
some are still able to find legitimate employment, such as Mr. sketchy, or Sticks McShovel, internationally famous as the "construction sign stick figure". Mr. McShovel said in a statement that while he felt for his fellow cheap illustrations, and wished he could help them out, "there simply aren't enough signs to go around"
Johnny Bighand still remains hopeful, though. "maybe I can go back to college, meet a new illustrator, maybe get a different facial expression. But right now it's day to day. I'm just trying to avoid getting erased"