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joiachi — Sebastian
Published: 2010-12-13 01:17:22 +0000 UTC; Views: 613; Favourites: 29; Downloads: 4
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Description
Art Trade with::EDIT:: I added the eyebrow and makeup (I can't believe I forgot to draw in the eyebrow =_
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Comments: 11
Here are some things that could be changed or done differently that would have greater impact and make your work look more realistic.
1. i think the most detailed part of this entire painting is the hair, and while the character is the main focal point, my eyes wander to the top of his head-not his face. Your hair suggests harder light and shadow while the skin and arm do not.
2.The neck is not aligned to the head. If you can compare each side to the man's jaw bone and see that on one side the neck comes out further than the other. By putting a small gap between the arm and the neck, it would make it more proportional and tie in the background more. (at least i think so)
3. The shading on the arm is more complex and detailed at the bottom of the arm but as the shading continues upward, it basically goes flat. It simply makes it look like you got bored and decided not to finish with what you started. e.deviantart.net/emoticons/x/x… " width="15" height="15" alt="
4. The ties on the arm/glove should be curved. It would give a sense of realism and make a more relaxed shape to the character.
5. the hands, i give you kudos for actually putting a hand in the picture and choosing a rather difficult position to paint it; however, using reference would help. Even if its your own by doing simple glances at your hand will help you> The one touching his lip for example, the thumb has the right curve but take your hand and have the same position. You'll notice the line extending down from the index finger is not continually straight. It curves due to the bone in the hand and the pressure applied to it by the thumb.
6. The last two things- the hair and the eye. I dont understand the hair? is that a highlight or a band? if it is a highlight then it should not be so smooth and flat. The shading of your hair suggests that pieces are sticking everywhere and up, but the highlights are not broken up and suggest that its all flat. I wouldn't use a highlight so 'bright'either. Using a lighter tint of the hair color itself will make it look more believable and match the rest of your shading. Lastly, the eyes- perhaps this is personal preference, but i do not like it when eyes are hidden but you clearly know that it would be seen given the circumstances. Painting in the eye would again make it look more realistic and give you a chance to have more depth. It would be painted in shadow which would better help in locating the lighting source for both you and the viewer.
While i'm not sure exactly what 'vision' means, i think you have a good focal point, use of color, and details. This could be more original but i do not know the character so i can't exactly say if it or isn't e.deviantart.net/emoticons/s/s… " width="19" height="19" alt="
e.deviantart.net/emoticons/w/w… " width="15" height="15" alt="
While this is an art trade, i am here to critique a picture that could look much better if given the time and chance. You may have worked hard on it, you may not have. Either way i hope this will help you. I am no expert, but i know it takes practice, patience, and determination to make a piece the best that it can be.
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Thank you for the critique! It's very helpful and I will keep these things in mind for next time. I knew this piece wasn't perfect, but I couldn't pinpoint all the possible improvements on my own. Thanks so much, this was extremely helpful ^-^
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well i hope so 
good luck with the rest of your work
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So, this is.. interesting. to see Sebby in someone elses Art form XD Okay first off, he would have been wearing makeup, he's a makeup whore, specially with eyeshadow and such, Secondly, where is his eyebrow? OAO Everything else you got pretty good :3 the skin color is perfect and the look on his face screams 'im innocent', which half the time he isn't HAHA. xD Well, I think minus missing the eyebrow and the makeup, you did pretty well. Although, one side of his hair is made to be longer then the other side :3 just saying <3 But this looks wonderful other then that, good job!
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I added the eyebrow and a bit of makeup, hope it's *slightly* better.
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I drew the eyebrow in the original sketch, but I guess I painted over it and then forgot =_= my bad.
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