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May 8, 2006

Dear Manager Person Of Chuck-E-Cheese,

I recently ate with my children at your chuck-e-cheeses restaurant, and when I arrived home, I was surprised to realize that Adam (my toddler) had grown whiskers. I quickly rushed over to the doctor’s office, but by the time I got there, Adam’s ears had migrated to the top of his head, and turned round, grey and furry.

This alarmed me.

As I rushed to the emergency room door, I saw-before my very eyes-his nose reshape into a conical muzzle with a pink, round dot at the end.

As I waited in the waiting room, Adam bristled hair all over his body, and grew claws. I brought him into the doctor’s office, the doctor yelled, grabbed a cross and began praying to Jesus. A nurse ran in with a shotgun, and shot my son in the face.

The doctor stopped whimpering, and said that the Adam had a hideous disease that can be passed from those plastic ball thingies in the ball pool into the toddler’s mouth.

I demand a $10 gift certificate to your store.

~Cosmo Comett

Description
May 8, 2006

Dear Manager Person Of Chuck-E-Cheese,

I recently ate with my children at your chuck-e-cheeses restaurant, and when I arrived home, I was surprised to realize that Adam (my toddler) had grown whiskers. I quickly rushed over to the doctor’s office, but by the time I got there, Adam’s ears had migrated to the top of his head, and turned round, grey and furry.

This alarmed me.

As I rushed to the emergency room door, I saw-before my very eyes-his nose reshape into a conical muzzle with a pink, round dot at the end.

As I waited in the waiting room, Adam bristled hair all over his body, and grew claws. I brought him into the doctor’s office, the doctor yelled, grabbed a cross and began praying to Jesus. A nurse ran in with a shotgun, and shot my son in the face.

The doctor stopped whimpering, and said that the Adam had a hideous disease that can be passed from those plastic ball thingies in the ball pool into the toddler’s mouth.

I demand a $10 gift certificate to your store.

~Cosmo Comett